HELP! I wanted to read fiction for social reasons but I think I can't do it

[Rasheed]

I want to read literature aka fiction books because it will make it easier for me to socialize I guess because many people are into literature and non-fiction. Thing is I like to read psychology, philosophy, religion aka non-fiction and reading fiction for me is tough.

Right now I am reading Virginia Woolf's 'to the Lighthouse' I am halfway there, I don't like it even though Virginia Woolf is one of the greatest fiction writers of all time. I don't like fiction because it is impractical, it does not teach me anything valuable like non-fiction reading of psychology, spirituality, personal development does. 

Another thing I discovered about these fictions books: They are way too long. For example Tolstoy's main book is like 50 hours. Dostoevsky's 'Brother Karamazov' is 40 hours. His book 'Idiot' is 30 hours long. James Joyces's main book is 30 hours. (I am listening to them as audiobooks that is why I am writing hours here) (so right now I realized I probably won't be able to read this, it is way too much.) Imagine that!!! These books are super, super long.  I have no problem reading huge books because I have read super complex, super long books. for example Ken Wilber's 'Religion of Tomorrow' is 40 hours long. I read that book and loved it. Thing is I can read Ken Wilber for 40 hours without any problem. I can read long non-fiction book because it is non-fiction but I can't read 40 hours of Dostoevsky or Tolstoy i.e. fiction...That is my problem. That is why I am talking about length. If non-fiction is long, that is great but for fiction...Hell no. 

So my question is: WHAT TO DO?

• Can reading summaries of these books be enough? Probably summaries will be shorter but at the same time, I don't want to be faking like I read these books when I only read summaries of them. That is because main reason I want to read fiction is to help me socialize, to become what Mark Manson calls in his book Models: "a man with artistic taste"
• Should I read summaries? What should I do? Are summaries enough for me to understand these books?

 

Edited November 9, 2022 by Rasheed

[Yarco]

If you want to fake it, then yeah I'd read summaries / "Cole's Notes" condensed versions of books. Or listen to a video summarizing the main points on Youtube.

I question whether people are really into reading fiction, to the point that it's a vector for starting conversations. Can't remember the last time I heard someone talk about reading a book.

Unless you're specifically in a book club where you're guaranteed to be reading the same book as a bunch of other people, there has to be a more valuable way to spend your time for starting conversations.

You spend 50 hours reading some Tolstoy book, ask someone "Have you read X?" They say no, you just wasted 50 hours.

Find people who read and talk about non-fiction, or people who don't read at all lol.

Go watch some Marvel movies if you want to connect with normies, that'll get you way further than reading a bunch of literary classics. Every time I'm around people they're talking about superhero crap.

Edited November 9, 2022 by Yarco

[Rasheed]

My goals are from doing this:

•  to connect with people on social level, like friend to friend
• Also, to connect with women on man to women level.

————

So @Yarco you are telling me that reading literature for those goals is stupid and I need to watch movies instead? 
Right now, I am contemplating reading summaries of those literature books, but at the same time I don’t want to fake it but will that be considered faking? Come on, I can’t imagine most people reading 50 hours of Tolstoy, they probably are faking as well…Who knows. 
 

[Yarco]

Yeah, if you don't enjoy reading fiction, then why would you want to fake it to be friends with readers?

Find people with common interests instead. If you like sports, there are lots of people who will talk to you about sports. Same with video games, and pretty much every hobby.

If you want to find people who are interested in spirituality, psychology, philosophy... then try to think of where those kinds of people hang out, and go there. Yoga class, a workshop or book signing, a retreat, look for groups on meetup.com, etc. Then you don't have to fake it, you can find people to talk to about things you're really interested in.

[r0ckyreed]

Listening to audiobook isn’t the same thing as reading!! 

Maybe that is the problem. Reading a physical book under a tree in nature is so enjoyable. It is much harder to listen to books on technology. Consider that.

Edited November 9, 2022 by r0ckyreed

[Rasheed]

15 minutes ago, r0ckyreed said:

Listening to audiobook isn’t the same thing as reading!! 

Maybe that is the problem. Reading a physical book under a tree in nature is so enjoyable. It is much harder to listen to books on technology. Consider that.

I don’t know bro about that, when it comes to fiction I love both so that is probably ain’t the reason…

[Rasheed]

1 hour ago, Yarco said:

Yeah, if you don't enjoy reading fiction, then why would you want to fake it to be friends with readers?

Find people with common interests instead. If you like sports, there are lots of people who will talk to you about sports. Same with video games, and pretty much every hobby.

If you want to find people who are interested in spirituality, psychology, philosophy... then try to think of where those kinds of people hang out, and go there. Yoga class, a workshop or book signing, a retreat, look for groups on meetup.com, etc. Then you don't have to fake it, you can find people to talk to about things you're really interested in.

Do you also advice watching movies in order to connect with more people rather than literature?

[Rob06]

If you don't like to read fiction at this point, don't force yourself into it, especially if your aim with it is to make friends. Read fiction if you enjoy it. Many people are into non-fiction books, and these people can be your friends too. 

On making friends: this became way more easy to me when I learned to just listen to others and be genuinely interested in what they have to say. People tend to judge you as a good conversation partner when you're in fact a good listener.

[Rasheed]

4 hours ago, Rob06 said:

If you don't like to read fiction at this point, don't force yourself into it, especially if your aim with it is to make friends. Read fiction if you enjoy it. Many people are into non-fiction books, and these people can be your friends too. 

On making friends: this became way more easy to me when I learned to just listen to others and be genuinely interested in what they have to say. People tend to judge you as a good conversation partner when you're in fact a good listener.

Dale Carnegie advises in his book: How to Win Friends and Influence People to focus upon becoming a great listener and be genuinely interested in other people’s opinions…

[Mohammad]

Well, I think "Fiction" is a broad category. For example I personally don't like Virginia Wolf's books, and I will probably get bored while reading those, but this doesn't mean I don't like fiction books.

I recommend try different authors, with different writing styles, and probably from different countries.

Read Murakami books. "Kafka on the shore" is one of his bests, although it is pretty long.

There are many fiction books that are not long.

Just don't expect to like every fiction book even from great authors. I've read  lot, and I believe most fiction books are useless and boring. Find the good ones that fits your mind and personality.

And to be honest, I never thought of reading fiction books as a means for better communication! Interesting that you see it that way. I recommend reading non-fiction books that are about this topic(better communication and making friends) instead of reading fiction.

[caspex]

Enjoying fictional books is pretty hard for those of us who see books as a source of knowledge not entertainment. It feels like you are wasting your time. Well, read it when you are wasting your time then. When you'd have wasted your time anyways for example watched a movie/show/youtube video, just read that book. Although if you're goal is other than to enjoy the story itself then I don't see you finishing the book. I'd only read a fiction book if I believe it will connect to me on some level and resolve some karmic issue inside. But that's the case with any sort of entertainment.

[Epikur]

@Rasheed

Why don't  you start with interesting fiction like detective novels? They work for most people.

[Carl-Richard]

I don't get how you can do it.