Fallen Off The Path Of Meditation

[ArabiaNytes]

Leo had touched on the idea that the Ego can be very distracting when it comes to meditation in that if a person becomes entranced with the motivation to meditate, then the Ego is threatened for fear of falling apart --- as it does when practicing meditation and self-actualization on the path to enlightenment.

Yup ... I've felt my Ego get in my way and it's disturbing. I LOVED meditating and truly felt like it was getting me somewhere. But once I felt this eager to dedicate my life to this work, a strange thing happened. I would plan on meditating or think of doing it in the moment ... but then, I wouldn't. WHY???

How could I truly want to practice and not have any reasons to hold me back from doing it ... and yet, I don't do it. 

Do I not want to do it as badly as I think I do? 

This goes for my studying, too. I LOVE my major and dream of practicing it professionally ... and yet, lately ... I'm cramming for tests jus to get a low B. 

*sigh* I don't understand why I jus feel so frozen.

[Christian]

Stop thinking and start again, but this time, make it a 100% commitment

[Shin]

Don't let your mind rationalize anything, you have 3 seconds top until your ego finds a good excuse, and you will believe it, everytime.

[ArabiaNytes]

Funny how when I post about my dilemmas, I scroll down in the forum and find an answer in someone else's post. I just watched Leo's video on laziness and it spoke to me, saying exactly what you said: Stop thinking, jus do it! 

My mind is blocking me through maladaptive habits that occur in my roller-coaster cycles. Being an over-achiever sure has its perks ... but also it's curses. 

[Nahm]

1 hour ago, ArabiaNytes said:

Leo had touched on the idea that the Ego can be very distracting when it comes to meditation in that if a person becomes entranced with the motivation to meditate, then the Ego is threatened for fear of falling apart --- as it does when practicing meditation and self-actualization on the path to enlightenment.

Yup ... I've felt my Ego get in my way and it's disturbing. I LOVED meditating and truly felt like it was getting me somewhere. But once I felt this eager to dedicate my life to this work, a strange thing happened. I would plan on meditating or think of doing it in the moment ... but then, I wouldn't. WHY???

How could I truly want to practice and not have any reasons to hold me back from doing it ... and yet, I don't do it. 

Do I not want to do it as badly as I think I do? 

This goes for my studying, too. I LOVE my major and dream of practicing it professionally ... and yet, lately ... I'm cramming for tests jus to get a low B. 

*sigh* I don't understand why I jus feel so frozen.

Will power is highest when you wake up and gone by sunset. Use this to your advantage. 

Also, prime yourself. Listen to a video about how great meditation is for 5-10 minutes and you'll be much more inclined to then do it.