I'm an alcoholic...

[EmergentUniverse]

My ego doesn't want me to stop drinking. My ego has something to prove by being stubborn. Learning how to not listen to my ego will take work. I can't do my own work on someone else's watch. 

[Breakingthewall]

you have to go deeper into yourself. the first step is daily meditation. You drink to calm your anxiety. your anxiety is the distortion between what is and what should be. This distortion is the product of the illusion of separation that manifests as a lack of love. You need love. You think you'll have love when things are as they should be. they are not, and the distance between those points is pure anxiety, a void of love that is filled with addiction. seeing all this is not something that reason can achieve, you have to get to the bottom of yourself

 

[Someone here]

YOU have to want it. Not your spouse, your family, government, whatever. Only when you, personally, have decided enough is enough, will you be able to quit successfully.

Decide. Tell yourself why you want to quit. See alchohol as your enemy. Hate it. Fight it. Man up, buck up. Who's in control? Are you a bitch? Get mad at it. F THAT.

[Thought Art]

@EmergentUniverse I love that you know and admit this. I was addicted to Marijuana for a very long time. I've gone about 3 months not smoking it and I feel a lot of self esteem and self efficacy improvements.

Try buying a book on addiction and or drinking.  Beat The Booze

Also here is an article on how the practice of Qigong can help with Addiction A Massive Spiritual Shift: how the mindful movement of Qigong can treat addiction

Here's a book on using Qigong to treat addiction coming out in a month : Recovering You: Soul Care and Mindful Movement for Overcoming Addiction

I think Qigong was one of the biggest factors in my current sobriety. It's helped me to regulate my emotions. Instead of reaching for a joint, I reach for my mat. 

My father was an Alcoholic. This is why I never really got into drinking.

Love, and be kind to yourself through this. 

Edited October 30, 2022 by Thought Art

[inFlow]

@EmergentUniverse Find another dopamine source to counter your alcohol addiction. Cold showers works wonders.

Also psychedelics would be great for you, because you would go upward in consciousness instead of going down with alcohol and seeing a obvious difference would make you stop using such a numbing/dulling intoxicant.

[hoodrow trillson]

How much do you drink OP?  Let's say in 1 week.

[Carl-Richard]

12 hours ago, EmergentUniverse said:

My ego doesn't want me to stop drinking. My ego has something to prove by being stubborn. Learning how to not listen to my ego will take work. I can't do my own work on someone else's watch. 

You should actually listen to your ego. It's trying to tell you something. What are you lacking? Fix it and your ego will shut up about it.

[tuku747]

 

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_dawQLA-mA

https://www.shinzen.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/art_urges.pdf
 

Read “Recovery” by Russell Brand

Read “the easy way to stop drinking” by Allen Carr

Edited October 31, 2022 by Raze

[EmergentUniverse]

On 10/30/2022 at 7:06 AM, Breakingthewall said:

you have to go deeper into yourself. the first step is daily meditation. You drink to calm your anxiety. your anxiety is the distortion between what is and what should be. This distortion is the product of the illusion of separation that manifests as a lack of love. You need love. You think you'll have love when things are as they should be. they are not, and the distance between those points is pure anxiety, a void of love that is filled with addiction. seeing all this is not something that reason can achieve, you have to get to the bottom of yourself

 

Thank you

[EmergentUniverse]

On 10/30/2022 at 9:11 AM, lxlichael said:

@EmergentUniverse

Best wishes. Can't suggest much else. I would look at learning to identify, discriminate between and understand your emotions + make a (private) drinking journal. Document the craving cycle, triggers, etc.

That will trigger your memory in response to the patterns.

You'll generate a reward cycle around self-discovery as opposed to say drinking to avoid the emotions you have to deal with when you don't drink (don't know enough about your personal situation though, cleaning up is so difficult for people). Question and engage with people here as well, it'll be good support. Ignore/related any people that don't empathise.

Identify the positive, you started off by saying "my ego...". So many people struggle to objectify, detach and analyse. Then there's the difficult part of really diving deep into any painful emotions that may be there that you need clearing, as minimum I recommend vipassana for a baseline. I don't know what you know or where you are with what you'd like to involve yourself with so I'll just leave you be. Peace.

Good luck.

On 10/30/2022 at 7:09 AM, Someone here said:

YOU have to want it. Not your spouse, your family, government, whatever. Only when you, personally, have decided enough is enough, will you be able to quit successfully.

Decide. Tell yourself why you want to quit. See alchohol as your enemy. Hate it. Fight it. Man up, buck up. Who's in control? Are you a bitch? Get mad at it. F THAT.

Thank you so much

[Raze]

Read recovery by Russell Brand

Join AA

get ifs therapy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_dawQLA-mA
 

https://www.shinzen.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/art_urges.pdf

[EmergentUniverse]

On 10/30/2022 at 10:25 AM, Optimized Life said:

Why? Theres so little to gain from alcohol. 

Become addicted to  sports, art, playing the guitar ... 

Becoming addicted to helping others, or competing professionally if that's your thing

Just transmute the addiction, the pleasure will be so much higher, with added fulfilment.

Have an animal like addiction to positive things. 

From your posts it looks like you focus on topis like politics, race and psychedelics. 

Sounds like all these things are a distraction, don't read or talk about this stuff, focus solely on becoming a healthy happy individual, but if psychedelics is a tool that gets you there than keep it, but be honest with yourself that it actually is helping.

My problem is precisely this.... I've been addicted to guitar, music, art, and helping others. All things I try to help suffer when I suffer. I hope you understand that I don't emphasize race in my thinking at all... but recognizing that race is real in this world, I felt reassured about being here after seeing how the company of those here dealt with a particularly racist thread. Nonetheless, I appreciate your words of encouragement, and I take them to heart. Thank you for being thoughtful. 

Edited December 10, 2022 by EmergentUniverse

[AncestorOfAisle6]

Do you have a loving support system In your surroundings?

[John Paul]

It has to do with control. Look at how you crave control. I’m the same way.