Repitition

[Principium Nexus]

Sometimes it feels like that I have the same conversation over and over again. It's not the content but the way the protocol of talking/emotions/ego is set-up. Beforehand I already know my intentions or the ones other people are trying to satisfy and its like walking to the same psychological construct over and over again.

The thing is the psychology is really obvious and most people act like hoards since they all inherently want to fit in a certain group. Behaviour gets coppied and on top of that most people try to find their "unique" personality within that frame.

I like talking to people and learn a lot of new insights but eventually I always walk against a wall of knowing the person well that the new stuff that I didnt know declines. It like writing a character and eventually you completed the most important aspects and everything else are fine details.

I don't really know how to put it but I wonder if you guys understand what i mean. How do you handle this? 

I would love to know how you guys look at this.

[Trond]

What I think you mean is that you look at people as all the same and the only thing to make them apart are minor personality details, preferences/opinions etc? 

Because you are developed you are able to consciously see this. You see through the illusion easier, that is one of the reasons a lot of your conversations will "feel the same", because in a way they are. You interacting with you. Just another Ego version. If this is what you are referring to, I do understand you. Feel the exact same thing, more and more. 

Mostly I handle it by not talking to people, haha, but that is just me. When I do talk to people, its fine, because Ego handles it. The necessary mask is put on and I just let the conversation go. As I don't hold any strong opinions anymore and cling less to beliefs(at least try to) I just let it flow as the way it goes. Walk away or end it if the other part gets to defensive or resistant. In a nice way of course. I simply don't have that much of a reason to "get my voice heard" anymore. 

Let me know if I interpreted your situation correct  

[aclokay]

Try to not abstract life but look at it in detail.

If you abstract everything. Yes. Everything is the same and obvious. Conversation is a protocol. Words are constructing a sentence. Tones are conveying meaning and emotion. 

Try to understand why the person is saying what they're saying. Maybe they're repeating things just so they could connect with you and have nothing else to say. if it's still boring, well, I guess you're naturally not interested in that person.Look for another one. 

When things become repetitive in a relationship, I usually try to push it to different direction. Ask new things. Share those new insights I have and see if people give me insights about my insights. And sometimes I lose interest, and simply let go and focus on other things. 

Best of luck!

 

 

[Nahm]

I think I can relate. It is like the more beliefs somebody has, the easier they are to understand (their emotions etc) and they become a little predictable and repetitive? 

I would bet you don't hold many beliefs. That's why you can see more of the truth. 

 

[Principium Nexus]

@Tronds World Yes that's sort of what I experience, but it is mainly with people I have to be due to study/duties/attendance/ect. With good friends and family I don't experience it that much, maybe because I can relate better to them?

@aclokay I know abstracting things won't make things better, but I'm really conscious of what peoples intentions are and they are most of the time good and search for happiness. Talking to a few persons is okay because I don't only care about myself and are interested what the have to say. What bothers me is that long days can be really exhaustive and that it might feel more like people pleasing than genuinely participating in their chat. 

[aclokay]

1 minute ago, Principium Nexus said:

@Tronds World Yes that's sort of what I experience, but it is mainly with people I have to be due to study/duties/attendance/ect. With good friends and family I don't experience it that much, maybe because I can relate better to them?

@aclokay I know abstracting things won't make things better, but I'm really conscious of what peoples intentions are and they are most of the time good and search for happiness. Talking to a few persons is okay because I don't only care about myself and are interested what the have to say. What bothers me is that long days can be really exhaustive and that it might feel more like people pleasing than genuinely participating in their chat. 

I can relate to  "... long days being really exhaustive..". When you feel that it's getting exhaustive, I'm guessing it's because you prefer to do other things. Even if those things are staring at the wall, scrolling through the interwebs or whatever.  I say then, just do them. You don't have an obligation to be friendly every time somebody want to talk to you.

You can hint at them that you're doing other things. Or, my favorite, tell them the truth. "Hey, I'm tired of talking, nothing personal, we can chat tomorrow or something, I need some time to myself". They shouldn't take it personally. If they do, well then It's their problem" 

Maybe to repeat Leo's Mantra of "I'm completely independent of the good or bad opinions of others" it helped me a lot !