___ b_Tyler Robinson journal station 1

[Tyler Robinson]

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After that sweet conversation he starts another conversation that veers off into a very strange direction. This time he tells me that he can kill any person he wants to..at first  I was laughing it off. 

Then I asked him if he was planning to hurt me. He said no. That he would never hurt me. Then why was he telling me how physically tough he was ? That he could break my wrist into two halves. He proceeded to tell me that he could make 6 people bleed at a time. He was in the Navy, so I don't know, all I know is that he is physically strong. When I told him that I'm not worried, he said -"you don't know what I can do in anger." Wasn't this an indirect threat. Then he told me that he would skin me alive, dry my skin and turn it into an umbrella. Am I a Jew? Is this the holocaust? Wtf? (He had promised me that he would come to my country at some point and visit me. He had been saving money for that.

At some point in this conversation I had some fear that he would find me and kill me. I don't know why but it was a paranoia fueled by this conversation and deep down I complied to him only out of fear. He is deeply dominating and controlling and because of my trauma I'm deeply attracted to such men..he is very masculine too. )

So I began goofing to kinda play along and told him that I would take a knife and stab his arm a bunch. He laughed at it and told me to slash his throat instead. I was very offended because his neck was my favourite place and I got emotional. I never wanted to kill him, never even entertained such a thought, so I was feeling sick of his twisted fantasy of me slashing his throat. I wanted to abandon the conversation but he wouldn't let me. He asked me to rape him. I told him that I couldn't do something like that. Then he told me some stuff and I asked him if he was raping me. He told me that if he wanted to rape me I could do nothing to stop him. I was feeling a bit weirded out by all this but I complied to his every word because I didn't want to piss him off anymore. I'm a bit of a people pleaser because of my low self esteem and BPD so I did not resist him at all. I could have ended the conversation but like I said I didn't want to piss him off, I could already sense from his violent talk that he was very angry at me. The overall implied meaning  of that conversation was - ”if you double crossed me and slept with another dude, I'm gonna chop you off. " I could sense his possessiveness about me, he wanted me sexually to himself even after rejecting and dumping me. Like wtf. If this is not controlling then what is ? Plus all the indirect machoism and threatening is once again blackmail to keep me with him. Since I had been his girlfriend,I know how he communicates on an intimate level. He talks publicly in a clear logical lucid manner. But privately he talks indirectly, choosing to communicate in metaphors. I have to sit down and interpret all of his indirect talk. Like he doesn't directly say - I love you. He will first throw a hint and wait for me to pick on it. If I don't get his hint,he will then proceed to unpack it for me. He was a shy introvert before and after taking psychedelics he turned into an extrovert. 

Once the conversation ended, I slept off blissfully thinking  that I had complied to all of his demands and that I had cooled off his anger. 

He ended the conversation by saying that he would hold me tightly in his arms  and take a nap. 

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Entry11/3

 

Next day. He texted me again profusely apologizing for all the violent talk of wanting to kill me and the umbrella comment. I forgave him. He was also apologizing for wanting to rape me (as a form of punishment for flirting with other men). I said it was alright, it was his bipolar episode after all.  (Frankly I had no clue as to what part of his conversation was his real intent and what part was his bipolar delusion). Then he once again told me that he cannot continue a relationship with me since he had dumped me too many times and that he didn't really love me.

I was extremely furious. Because he kept switching between "I love you" one day and then "I don't love you" the very next day, driving me insane with his constant manipulation and hot and cold mind games. I had enough of his twisted games and then placing the blame on me instead of taking responsibility and simply using his bipolar as an excuse to emotionally abuse me.

I was fed up and I told him to stop simping and baiting me with his "I love you" games. This time I decided to have a firm boundary and told him to fuck off for good  and not get sexual with me again. He had zero opportunity to have anymore sexy time because I had put an end to it. This was the first time I was firmly rejecting him for good. On his end, this was his fourth rejection. I had enough of his rejections and baiting.

He said that he was jealous if I dated someone else or if someone else wanted to fuck me, and this jealousy is after he had dumped me, like what right or entitlement does he have to be jealous after breaking the relationship??? Am I not free to move on and date others once he breaks up with me ? 

Next day on the forum he made a thread indirectly calling me "low vibrational energy" that he shouldn't deal with, being condescending towards me as though I was some prostitute he fucked in an alley.  Like really ???? If anything, I was a virgin he was trying so hard to seduce, <he would put 3 hours into giving me an orgasm, a lot of hard work right?> and he was the one who was talking about raping me, he was the one who was talking about skinning me alive and turning my skin into an umbrella. And after I complied to everything, I'm low vibrational energy ? Wtf. Like I should take all of his unkind talk, his emotional blackmail, his constant rejections and dumping, his sweet talk and fake simping, his violent outbursts, his bipolar mood swings,  his fantasies of raping and killing and torturing me,his indirect threats,  his jealousy, his unfair possessiveness and after tolerating all of his unkindness I also get labelled as the "bad person" "low quality person" "low vibrational energy," and get psychologically degraded by him. So after tolerating all of his craziness I am being degraded as a human publicly and left to absorb all the humiliation from him. Tell me who wouldn't be absolutely and insanely triggered by this ?

The amount of mind games that anyone would typically play over the course of a year, he played all those games in just a month, driving me to the edge of insanity. I felt like I wanted to be admitted to a psychiatric ward because I was breaking down emotionally with his constant baiting and dumping. Nobody should ever deserve this, at least not an emotional BPD person like me, what had I done wrong to deserve this. All I ever did was open up about my emotional wounds in my journal. And he preyed on it like a shark would hunt a sardine. Totally predatory. He enticed me, baited me sexually, weaponized sex, acted like he was comforting me, abandoned me whenever he wanted to, basically he used me because he wanted to feel desired by a woman and then ruthlessly cut me off without having a care in the world about my feelings. Does anyone act like this with someone they claim to love and support ? Didn't he say that he loved me(multiple times) and that he would never abandon me(multiple times) throughout the relationship ? If he thinks I hurt him, he hurt me 10 times more.. 

Treating me like some prostitute really hit my dignity. This was my last trigger point. I broke down. 

I had taken enough humiliation from him already and he was continuing to add insult to injury. So I decided to call him out on his insane behaviour and told him to get help with some psychiatrist because he had been driving me nuts with his insane Paranoia and misinterpretation of me. 

I never wanted to kill him. And he was calling me a killer on the forum. Is this not insane ?? When in reality he was the one expressing the desire to kill me?

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

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i called him fake. it triggered him badly. well obviously I should call him fake because all of his love and simping was a mockery of my emotions. He had taken emotional advantage of an emotionally disordered, mentally ill, traumatized, abused,  woman  for his sexual needs in the name of helping her.  He wanted me as a temporary girlfriend so he could practice his pickup skills on me and manipulate me to see if he can win my affection. He even told me that he first started following Leo because he was desperate to pick up girls. I felt emotionally manipulated and played and dumped and then humiliated. Simping is never innocent, it's a form of manipulation too. Do you see how this can be manipulative? Just because you have your male agenda doesn't mean men can't be manipulative. 

 i began to act weird after that. This was May 17. I was losing my mental balance at this point, i was unable to deal with the mind games he was playing. i was severely addicted to him. he had gotten me addicted to him emotionally. he was on my mind 24/7. i couldn't break off my attachment to him. BPD has severe attachment issues. You have to abandon them slowly not quickly,  otherwise they become unstable. i began to suffer what is known as BPD dissociation. i felt like everything was unreal, i was sleepwalking. i kept saying his name  a million times to myself, even in sleep i was murmuring his name. He had quickly broken off with me, but to break off completely from him was incredibly difficult for me. i needed some time to slowly forget him. (but he was impatient and didn't give a damn about me) he wanted to quickly get over me and be done with it. So in order to not forget him,i copied his profile picture and his journal title. i was amused within me. My intention wasn't to stalk him. I was just trying to have something of him with me, some semblance, some symbol. So i took his profile picture. i wanted his shirt as a memory of our relationship but i couldn't get that. So I took his profile picture. This is like you love a puppy and then you abandon the puppy on the side of the street. And the puppy comes running back and latches on to your door because the puppy doesn't want to feel abandoned and you keep accusing the puppy of stalking. How awful is that !! If doing this to an animal is considered wrong, why is it okay to do this to a human ? Why is it okay to do this to a woman ?

Why is it okay to lead someone on, string them along and then break their heart? Just because he was bored ?  Am I not a human being ? Do I not have feelings ? Why tell me that he loves me if he wasn't really into me ? Because he desired having a girlfriend at the cost of my trust and emotions ????  If my lying hurt him, what about him hurting me with his manipulation? Why is that not sickening? What about all the days I cried over feeling used, played and dumped. 

He put a ton of effort in to winning my trust, and simping me and promptly abandoned me without giving a damn about my feelings. Playing with someone's emotions is okay?

How is his behaviour moral ? 

All of this while I told him that abandoning me could worsen my BPD. Yet he didn't give a single duck about me..why should I give a duck about him then ?

he told Leo that I was stalking him. i was only trying to hold on to whatever that belonged to him. In my mind he was still with me. Initially i didn't want to be his girlfriend and i lied about my age to ward him off. But later he got me hooked with all the emotional and sexual talk. I feared this the most, that's why I was reluctant to  being his girlfriend. I didn't want the consequences of being abandoned, i knew i would become insane if that were to happen.
if he had waited a bit and stayed patient, i would have eventually forgotten him,let him go and moved on..But he made a big fuss out of it and began gossiping and telling everyone that i was stalking him. i even sent a message to him through you to tell him that i never meant any harm. But his Big as a mountain ego wouldn't budge. Mr Egoic Psychedelic Prince that he is.. he kept whining and it was stressing me out. i was trying to cope with everything all at once - the breakup and abandonment, the consequences of his mind games,  BPD dissociation as a result of the abandonment and demonization and accusations of being a stalker. it was my breaking point.

To top it up you were constantly slandering me saying that I had a dozen forum boyfriends, when i had only two relationships of being here at least 3 years, i hadn't seduced any guy, they would simp me and use me as a temporary girlfriend because they never had a woman and I'm kinda submissive and easy to manipulate with sweet talk. it's not okay to emotionally manipulate someone and dump them once your needs are satisfied, its predatory. i was kinda happy with my imaginary boyfriends, there was no need to seduce me. And then hurt me. Those mind games hurt too.

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

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I kept telling him that he needed to relax and that i wasn't stalking him. He dragged it from mid May to the whole of June. i decided that it was best to leave the forum because he wouldn't stop complaining. i had stopped copying him long ago. But he started the same " she is stalking me " drama again on June 15. Its like he couldn't and wouldn't stop reading my journals. it was so simple. i had slowly began to dissolve my attachment to him. i succeeded and i had stopped thinking about him altogether. But he was still paranoid about me.

i made a post about Dragon. he thought it was about him. it wasn't about him at all. He was super paranoid at all times. i simply didnt have the freedom to write anything i wanted.

anything and everything i wrote, his paranoid mind thought it was about him.

 he simply couldn't stop reading about me. in some ways he was obsessed with me. he couldn't let me go completely. he rejected me so many times and kept coming back until i put a full stop to it. i mean that should tell you how much he thought about me .

Even in the relationship, he had put a massive amount of effort to keep me around. He kept me hooked on as much as he could. None of my exes put this level of effort in keeping me. 

although he did all that, he also gave me a hard time with his mind games, manipulative ways and destructive ways. 

I give him credit for getting me interested in psychedelics. They were good things about him like he taught me some spiritual stuff. He also helped me understand bipolar people better and cultivate empathy for them although I won't date bipolar people again because bipolar and BPD complicate one another a bit. 

The whole experience with his behaviour left me feeling bitter, vulnerable, played, betrayed, abandoned, hurt, fearful, weak, humiliated, demonized, frustrated, and unable to trust anyone again. He knows how to play victim and meticulously hide his own role in hurting others. It's almost like he just cannot see what he does. 

 

 

[Tyler Robinson]

 

 

On 9/1/2022 at 3:27 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

The essence of the idea of Karma-Yoga is to meet with unpleasant things equally with pleasant things. That is, in practicing Karma-Yoga, one does not seek always to avoid unpleasant things, as people ordinarily do. Life is to be met with non-identifying. When this is possible, life becomes one's teacher; in no other sense can life become a teacher, for life taken as itself is meaningless, but taken as an exercise it becomes a teacher. It is not life that is a teacher, but one's relation through non-identifying makes it become a teacher. Nothing can change being so much as this practice - namely, to take the unpleasant things in life as an exercise. (Maurice Nicoll, Commentaries, Vol. 1)

In other words, it's about learning how to not take occurrences in life in a negative way.

It's a process of purifying the heart.

 

On 9/1/2022 at 4:25 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

 

Chapter37 - compilation of my dreams 

 

Chapter38 - Good experiences

 

Chapter39 - High IQ and high EQ

 

Chapter40 - Angelic Energy

 

Chapter41- Eduoid - human NPC

 

Chapter42 - Completely naked

 

Chapter43 - Bullet focus

 

Chapter44 - A Lot of Drama

 

Chapter45 - Shame

 

 

 

 

[Tyler Robinson]

Chapter38 - Good experiences 

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Life is all about having a good experience and then piling them up to create memories. Life passes by anyway. 

 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 1:01 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

I made a ton of mistakes. Tons and tons and tons of mistakes. It was my naivete and innocence and my capacity to not be too skeptical that caused me to keep making more mistakes. 

Yet I've come so far, I have learned so much, I'm doing much better than before. My autism was a huge cause. But hopefully I will get over it. 

I tell myself everyday that I need to learn and grow. 

So many things I have to be good at. I still lack so much. 

One thing that always helped me is self honesty. I have never tried to do something that didn't align with who I was. 

 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 4:18 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

How to have good experiences? 

- I really don't know. I crave for wholesome and good experiences. I have been treated shitty for a very long time. 

Now I want to be around decent respectful folks who give me what I'm worth 

Then I want to feel good about life at least once in a while. 

I want to imagine the arms of a lover(I know I'm a die hard romantic) and I want to feel like I am completing this life and moving into another reincarnated form for my next birth. 

I want to spend a few beautiful years before going anonymous or into oblivion forever. 

I want to make good of my life, learn a new skill and then take the path of spirituality for the rest of my life. 

I want to have a short term career of an artist or writer. 

Make some money while I can. 

 

 

I have understood that the core component of life is basically having good experiences and then channeling ones energy towards something productive and worthwhile and settling into a beautiful routine of love, creativity, health, work, peace and freedom.

I was never given a fair chance. 

 

Having that integrity,consistency  that stability (that I craved), having that continuity, having that purpose and having that fulfillment. 

 

The key to life lies in its rhythm and its flow, it's simplicity and its beautiful exchange between the life and the liver. 

 

I wasted my teenage years in bad experiences. 

I'm so hungry for knowledge, for learning. 

 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 4:49 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

Learn learn learn. 

Berrylee 

NPC NPC NPC 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 5:05 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

24/7 monitor 

 

I need to keep a 24/7 monitor. 

So I know that I'm constantly in a healthy state of mind and only experiencing good things. 

 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 5:17 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

How am I productive Today? 

Ask that question. 

 

 

[Tyler Robinson]

Chapter39 - High IQ and high EQ

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Chapter39 - High IQ and high EQ

Entry1/39

 

 

Chapter40 - Angelic Energy

Entry1/40

 

 

Chapter41- Eduoid - human NPC

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Chapter42 - Completely naked

Entry1/42

 

 

Chapter43 - Bullet focus

Entry1/43

 

 

Chapter44 - A Lot of Drama

Entry1/44

 

 

Chapter45 - Shame

Entry1/45

 

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

Chapter37 - compilation of my dreams 

Entry1/37

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 6:11 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I woke up from a dream. In the dream I was imagining strange things. I was writing something. 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 6:43 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

So I saw this girl in the dream and she was somewhat bitchy towards me. 

She was my friend but she was quite passive aggressive most of the time. 

Throughout the dream I kept trying to talk to her. And sometimes she would be nice and sometimes mean. 

I showed her my flower collection. 

Then she slipped me a paper and I wrote a request order for more flowers. 

We went shopping later and she would complain and whine about every little thing. 

I also saw my sister in the same dream. 

 

  On 8/26/2022 at 6:45 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

When I woke up from the dream I was a bit sad and anxious.. Not able to make sense of things. 

 

 

  On 8/31/2022 at 10:48 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I had a bad dream again. A guy was throwing his semen at me in the dream. I was throwing up. I was too uncomfortable. Walking through corridors of an old university. There was this old lady who was following me around that building and she was being too stuck up and she told me a story about a couple. I got obsessed with that story. I wanted to know more. So I met that couple. But it's all blurred. Later I blame the same couple of stealing my story. I ran.... I don't know where. I can see myself walking with my relative to a nearby store and we buy a mattress, a Huge one. We lay it on the floor. It's a yellow mattress. I tell her that it's too rough and not good enough. We decide to get another one.. 

Dream ends abruptly. 

There were elements in the dream that made me excessively uncomfortable. 

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Chapter39 - High IQ and high EQ

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  On 8/24/2022 at 5:42 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

This is the only way. 

 

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 5:50 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

Eat eggs and yogurt 

 

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 10:32 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

So throughout my life I have observed that it's the low IQ low EQ kind of persons who always created the biggest problems for me. 

It's just a fact. I'm tired of dealing with such people. 

And a constant theme was either low IQ or low EQ. 

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 9:21 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I don't know what the world is headed to.. Again I don't think that this forum really matters or views expressed on this forum should be considered the worldview. 

Why are men this way? 

They're very forgiving towards men but completely unforgiving towards women. 

If a woman disagrees, whines or fights back, they immediately label her as toxic, yet when they see someone as pathetic as Andrew Tate, they still try to find something good about him. It's bewildering and sheer hypocrisy. 

Is society going to become more and more dangerous for women or are there good men still out there? 

I fear for the women now and for the women of the future. It's getting harder and dreadful by the day. 

A guy who says that men cheating on women is fine but women cheating isn't. 

A guy who has a video of him beating up a woman and yet we're supposed to assume it was simply a sexual kink. And give him a pass, Nevermind all the sexist stuff he says. Also there is no clear cut evidence to debunk the video. 

Most men said that they're okay with his misogynistic stuff. Why is it okay? 

Someone said that it's okay if he is seeing many women as long as the women are okay. Isn't this bad for a woman's emotional health? 

The views expressed here are mostly by insecure men and this could be a cesspool of them. That's why they support him. 

A man who really wants a great male role model who is secure in his manhood will never support someone as toxic as Andrew Tate, like Leo, he does not support him. 

I wonder where all the real men went, what kind of men are replacing these real men. 

I would shudder to think that every man thinks like Andrew Tate. Then I wouldn't want to be a part of this world.  

 

 

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

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  On 8/24/2022 at 9:46 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Before I go into a world of insecurity and bitterness,  I have to remind myself why things are the way they are. 

Once again it comes to IQ and EQ. 

In my opinion the people who act reasonable in life are the ones who have high IQ and high EQ.  Morality is not a factor here. Morality is only for stage blue dweebs.  

I don't wish to interact with anyone who is low IQ because they create drama and misery. Consistently. 

I don't consider Tate as high IQ and extremely low on EQ because he think women are just objects and refers to them as a bitch. 

So I already see signs of low IQ because high IQ people don't use labels.. 

I can see why he is so popular. He would be popular among low IQ men. Easily. 

Should I care about what a low IQ man has to say? Absolutely not. 

Because low IQ would only mean collapse of the planet in no time. It's like the whole world will turn into a trailer trash. Not an outcome you want. 

People say he is stage Red. No he is just an insecure hurt man, to be honest he gives out that small dick energy vibe and looks like a horribly insecure guy. I mean my first question was - who hurt you? 

Because it's so obvious he is trying so hard to compensate for something. 

I like men who are genuine and who don't care about money, who are happy with who they are, happy with what little they have but they know they worked hard for it and treat women with kindness. 

 

This whole forum has an incel-y energy and that's why they worship this guy. 

Now I get it. Well I know what I'm going to do. I will limit my interactions to only high IQ and high EQ people.. They will be my circle. 

Remember if you want to fight negativity and evil, and I'm not afraid to say that Andrew Tate is a force of evil because he tries to sow the seeds of division and make money off of it, then you have to draw your NPC circle where it's only you and some great quality friends. That's the only solution. 

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 9:52 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I found a helpful video on this Tate dude. I'm glad that there are still intelligent dudes who see through fake alpha man BS.. 

By the way as a side note, we are witnessing a fake alpha male blowhards  epidemic on the internet. 

Dismantling fake alpha male blowhards. 

 

 

Do not engage. Do not engage. Do not engage. 

#there are good men in this world. Don't worry. 

 

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 10:13 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I mean this Andrew Tate guy has to be a legit criminal. Someone below the video even hinted at this. I think he hides his criminal record by traveling to other countries. I constantly get this feeling that sooner or later this guy will have a criminal record because either he has already and masterfully hidden it, or he is going to be raking up stuff. 

Tate's fans will claim that this is all an act, that he is an amazing actor, he hasn't broken character in a decade. 

 

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Entry3/39

True. You could elaborate on his controversial principles. 

Do you think his treatment of women is fair? 

This is his ploy. He used social media to gain popularity by making his fans post his videos. It's sort of a grift. It's clever but it's not valuable. Another word for it is clout chasing. 

Meanwhile "experience is king" is very true, but do you really need a role model just to tell you that much. Leo tells you that everyday 

He wouldn't need to clarify if he wasn't impacted by the ban. On one hand he pretends that he doesn't care about what the internet thinks about him and on the other he releases a long video defending himself as a response to the ban. His claims that he is not impacted by anything are false as its clearly visible he is impacted by it. He also uses emotional music in his video to make people sympathize with him. Another clever trick. He is deeply insecure about the fact that he got banned otherwise he wouldn't need to make such a long response video. 

 

He is preying on vulnerable people by making it look like he cares for the concerns of young men, he saw that this would easily attract sympathetic men towards him like moths to a flame and people began to ride on his coattails. The only thing he is truly concerned about is fame and money and mostly fame that can be converted into money. More people talk about him, it generates more money for him. That's what social media influence is all about. He knows that if he talks about controversial topics it will easily attract frustrated men to him. He has deeply misogynistic views but he makes them look trendy. He is the epitome of the collective red pill shadow that most sexually frustrated men tend to share with him but don't have the balls to express it like he does so they're in awe of him because they have found someone who is resonating with their own shadow so openly. So they want to worship him. But he doesn't give two fucks about people because he is only using them for clout and money. He will not make anyone rich nor will he help these dudes get any girls, in fact he will end up achieving the opposite for these men, by following him, a lot of men will ingrain his toxic ideology on women and this will backfire and all these men will lose their girlfriends in apocalyptic ways and if they followed his rogue tactics of approaching women, these men would not even attract women in the first place,because his strategies are women repellant, and the only reason he gets a few low self esteem women is because those women themselves are clout chasers pretty much like Leonardo. Di Caprio's arm candy girlfriends, so the reason Andrew Tate attracts non holistic women is because he has money to spend on them and he gives them air time, lots of gold diggers would love that, this earns him even more money because guys genuinely believe that he attracts women, when in reality he could be paying Insta models to just hang out with him for photops that he could use on social media to create more buzz, more buzz means more money. 

That's Andrew Tate in short. 

 

 

 

An NPC response that I just love. Wish I could always be like that. 

 

Repeat - "I'm doing good, my growth is constant." 

 

 

Entry4/39

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 10:26 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

An NPC response that I just love. Wish I could always be like that. 

Repeat - "I'm doing good, my growth is constant." 

 

  On 8/24/2022 at 10:47 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Sadly I have realized that there are too many Andrew Tates out there. There's nothing that can be done but sigh at the ridiculousness of it all. 

 

Andrew Tate.... Connor Murphy. Same Same..

  On 8/24/2022 at 11:32 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Because the enemy would never know hidden reasons. 

 

 

  On 8/25/2022 at 1:36 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

Note to myself - don't take the forum too seriously. 

 

 

  On 8/25/2022 at 5:04 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

Was this like really high value? 

 I think you can probably get some stage Red stuff from him about success but much of it would be based on grifting, I don't know how far that would take you. Some people who are too desperate and don't care about morality as long as what they get might actually see the appeal with this dude.. But his success is not for the long term. Because long term success is based on something you build. Not on boasting. If you thought that life is totally meaningless then you might actually find value with his lifestyle because at the end of the day Stage Red focuses on getting what they want by any means. Although it can do collective harm, it is useful for the person who is doing it. I'm kinda confused when it comes to morality because it's very Stage blue and I don't like that, anything that contributes to everyone's wellbeing is good 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh wait, Andrew Tate should become my godfather lol

 

 

 

  On 8/25/2022 at 6:58 AM, Polymorph said:

Watch this. 

 

 

 

 

Edited September 24, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

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  On 8/26/2022 at 3:01 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

The kind of people that I need to be avoiding 

Too extroverted. 

Too unstable 

Bipolar. I don't get along with bipolar people. 

Girls who use the word - chick 

Stage Blue people who come from Mormon or religious backgrounds. Hypocrites all of them. 

Low IQ people - they're a big pain in the ass

Low EQ people - they can't empathize with someone's suffering. Either they are like robots or they are too insensitive assholes, or they moralize/judge/shame too much or they don't understand what's going on with you, they make a mountain out of petty nonsense. 

Guys whose philosophy aligns with Andrew Tate 

 

 

Policy updated

 

Edited September 24, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Chapter40 - Angelic Energy

 

Entry1/40 

 

  On 8/23/2022 at 3:17 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

I'm moving. 

 

  On 8/23/2022 at 3:36 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

I'm finally liberated after 4 years. 

All the evil we see in the world is the evil we ourselves create. 

All the evil is a product of lack of well being lack of angelic energy, its a product of a toxic environment. 

And there's nothing enticing about evil. 

Love, pure love, banishes any residual attraction to evil. 

 

 

  On 8/23/2022 at 6:43 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

What should you do when you face evil in life? 

You can't fight or beat evil. 

 

 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Chapter40 - Angelic Energy

Entry2/40 

 

I used to romanticize evil. I used to think that evil had some purpose in this world. That a lesser form of evil was needed to defeat a bigger form of evil.. In the sense poison beats poison kinda way. 

I contemplated on the subject of evil for 4 years and never received a clear cut answer or insight on this subject. It was most confusing part of my spiritual journey. I was still looking for answers.. I even starved myself for 3 days thinking that somehow I'll get some answers with pure focus. But no success. 

Then recently I just received this insight after a ton of contemplation that evil is not something manufactured by some outer space entity that we call the devil. Evil is real. Evil is created. I'm finally liberated after 4 years. All the evil we see in the world is the evil we ourselves create. It has nothing to do with that cosmic devil. 

I no longer fantasize evil.. That doesn't mean that I don't think about Satan. 

I will still do Satan med or Satanic Contemplations. 

I have UNDERSTOOD that for evil to really go away, certain prerequisites are needed - 

• Angelic energy 
• More NPC elements and less non NPC elements. Minimum non NPC elements. 
• A non toxic environment 
• Pure love 
• Well being 
• High IQ
• Simplicity 
• Peaceful 

 

What I found is that evil is not an opposition to good, its not a rival or a rival force fighting with good. Evil is a product. Evil is an outcome. Evil is a result. Evil is a consequence. Evil is a product of something. Therefore you can't fight evil. You cannot fight a product. You cannot punish a product. You have to see how the product was created. So shaming, punishing, demonizing, moralizing is absolutely pointless and even detrimental because it doesn't go to the heart of the issue and rather doesn't allow the resolution of the issue because we are stuck in punishment mode. The punishing makes us feel like we have solved the problem which is just an illusion. We actually haven't solved anything. In fact we have made it difficult to even get a solution. We cannot battle evil. We cannot fight evil. That's just not the right way about it. It's a temporary solution if at all. The real solution is to see how this product existed in the first place, what caused this product to be created. And as you dig deeper you realize that the product was created by a toxic environment. An environment that made a person choose wrong things in life. When you have a great environment  you won't have this product. 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

Entry3/40 

 

 

You can't fight or beat evil. 

You have to run away from it. Escape it. 

Evil is like dark black smoke. 

 

If you inhale this smoke, it's going to poison you. You can't beat or make this smoke vanish. It's impossible. Once you're engulfed by this smoke, you're unable to think straight, let alone fight it. You basically get drawn into it's negative energy and that energy messed with you. You're already weakened before you could attempt to do something. 

So what's the solution? 

The solution is to get away from this dark smoke, run away from it. Escape. Get as far as you can away from its toxicity and negativity.

 

That's where you see good things begin to come in life. 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Entry4/40

 

Go meta on love.

Question everything you believe about love.

Pretend like you don't know anything about love.

Treat love as the greatest mystery of life.

Treat love as magic, because that's what love is.

Love love for the fact that it exists.

Love love for the fact that it is so magical.

Love love itself, not any particular thing.

Love the fact that you experienced love at least once in your life.

Recognize the fact that love exists, and be grateful for it.

Love your existence unconditionally.

Be so grateful for your existence that not even hell can disturb you.

Love yourself for the fact that you can love anything at all, no matter how shallow are stupid that thing might be.

See the beauty in how profound your ignorance of love is, because that's how deep god's knowledge of love is.

See beauty in confusion and chaos.

See beauty in the fact that you're fucked.

See beauty in the fact that your life is fucked.

See beauty in the fact that the world is fucked.

See beauty in the fact that the state of being fucked even exists.

Feel proud of your future self for the fact that he can love something as bad as life.

Love the dance of the universe which is your experience, and dance with it.

Love the show of mankind because it is run on love and more importantly, the ignorance of love.

Love the beauty of sadness.

Cry more.

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

Chapter41- Eduoid - human NPC

 

Entry1/41

 

 8/22/2022 at 3:16 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I don't know what to say. 

 

  On 8/22/2022 at 3:18 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

I'm focused on what I'm going to do next. 

 

  On 8/22/2022 at 3:38 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Eduoid means you follow a set of instructions to navigate through the maze of uncertainty. 

 

  On 8/22/2022 at 3:57 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Reality is dysfunctional but you must live. You must survive through thick and thin. 

You need a twin flame who understands and truly loves you. 

 

  On 8/22/2022 at 5:58 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Yea maybe humanoid torture

  On 8/22/2022 at 6:22 PM, Tyler Robinson said:

Only imaginary forces can help me survive in this world. 

Only imaginary forces can help my spirit heal. 

Only imaginary forces can truly love me. 

 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Chapter42 - Completely naked

Entry1/42

 

 

Chapter43 - Bullet focus

Entry1/43

 

 

Chapter44 - A Lot of Drama

Entry1/44

 

 

Chapter45 - Shame

Entry1/45

 

 

[Tyler Robinson]

Chapter42 - Completely naked

Entry1/42

NPC, what's the point of saying something if it's not going to be happening, if it's not going to be reality. 

NPC yess. 

What are we doing other than hopelessly and selfishly trying to attain our respective agendas? What else is there to life? 

It's a circle. It's getting tighter. 

It's a tight circle. 

It's a tight circle

It's a tight circle. It's getting tighter. 

That's how I see it.

Life is all about agents and agency. We live in an agency. We did in an agency. 

It's a box. Everything is a box.. We are boxes chattering and wasting away our lives, our meanings mean nothing to the universe which is a giant space that keeps moving at infinite speed and doesn't care about what we love for ourselves. The desires of the universe has no relevance to who we are, we are narcissistic mortal beasts who have been bred time after time to occupy a space and eat it up to our heart's content.

Everything is imaginary and that which is loving is full of light and it grows and it shows. 

Rest is just white noise. 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[Tyler Robinson]

 

Entry2/42

 

  On 8/16/2022 at 2:31 AM, Tyler Robinson said:

 

Entry2

I changed. I completely changed. I unbanded. I disbanded. I truncated. 

I hollowed out. 

Entry3

[Verse 1: Simon]
Your honour, please, gotta believe what I say
What I will tell, happened just the other day
I must confess, cause I've had about enough
I need your help, gotta make this here thing stop

[Pre-Chorus: Lee & Antony]
Baby, I swear I'll tell the truth (Uh-huh)
About all the things we used to do (C'mon)
And if you thought you had me fooled
I'm telling you now, objection overruled (Here we go)
Oh baby

[Chorus:All,Duncan & Antony]
One for the money and the free rides
It's two for the lie that you denied
All rise, all rise (All rise)
Three for the calls you've been making
It's four for the times you've been faking
All rise (I'm gonna tell it to your face)
All rise (I rest my case)

[Verse 2: Duncan & Simon]
You're on the stand, with your back against the wall
Nowhere to run, and nobody you can call (Oh no)
I just can't wait, now the case is open wide
You'll try to pray, but the jury will decide

[Pre-Chorus: Lee]
Baby, I swear I'll tell the truth (Uh-huh)
About all the things we used to do
And if you thought you had me fooled (C'mon)
I'm telling you now, objection overruled
Oh baby

[Chorus:All,Antony & Lee]
One for the money and the free rides
It's two for the lie that you denied
All rise (All rise)
All rise (Oh oh, all rise)
Three for the calls you've been making
It's four for the times you've been faking
All rise (I'm gonna tell it to your face)
All rise (I rest my case)

[Bridge Rap: Simon]
So step back, cause you don't know this cat
I know deep down that, you don't want me to react
I lay low, leaving all my options open
The decision of the jury has not been spoken
Step in my house, you find that your stuff has gone
But in reality, to whom does the stuff belong?
I bring you into court, to preach my order
And you know that you overstepped the border (Uh-huh)

[Chorus: All,Lee & Antony]
One for the money and the free rides
It's two for the lie that you denied (Ooo)
All rise, all rise (C'mon)
Three for the calls you've been making (Yeah yeah)
It's four for the times you've been faking
All rise, all rise

One for the money (What'cha say) and the free rides
It's two for the (Can't you pay?) lie that you denied
All rise (What you've done)
All rise
Three for the calls (What'cha say) you've been making
It's four for the (Can't you pay?) times you've been faking
All rise (What you've done)
All rise (Where you've gone)

[Last - Chorus:All,Duncan & Antony]
One for the money and the free rides
It's two for the lie that you denied (Oh oh)
All rise (Oh oh)
All rise
Three for the calls you've been making
It's four for the times you've been faking (I said all rise)
All rise (I'm gonna tell it to your face)
All rise (I rest my case)

 

Entry4

Disorganized

Disordered

Dysfunctional 

 

. All in one. 

It's like I'm beating myself up with my own stick. There's love in hate I guess NPC. 

Because berrylee you were trapped among a bunch of cheapsters. 

And now you can't find your way out..Right??????? 

 

It's like Rob is screaming in my ears - I WON'T LET YOU GO. TRY THOUGH.... 

 

I have to stop being a nerd and feel the way I want to feel let it loose.. 

For some weird reason, everything is beginning to come together. 

I don't feel as much lost anymore, the way I used to be once. 

So when you hate me, do you love me too? 

I'm cold and frightened right now. 

Why am I always cold? 

I am trying to warm myself up with coffee. 

 

But nothing works. 

Now in this moment it feels like I already know too much about the universe.. I'm feeling sick and nauseous. 

NPC, first things first. 

My imagination is going helluva strong. 

• Jump onto something meatier 
• Cultivate the inner light 
• Build a tight circle 
• Everything is NPC 

 

I'm so cold right now I'm trembling. I just dont know. I need a boat load of blankets. 

There is absolutely nobody. There is absolutely nobody. There is absolutely nobody. And it doesn't even matter. There is absolutely nobody.. 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Tyler Robinson