Mondsee

Help Me Make My Grandma Happy Again :)

5 posts in this topic

My Granny is an 87 year old woman, she was super active her entire life and a great example for me. Right now tough, every time I go to visit her, she only tells me about all her worries. She worries for my grandpa (91 y/o in a declining state of health), worries that their savings are quickly declining because they spend so much in medicine, worries that my mother (her daughter) will have so much to arrange when they die, worries to die before my grandpa because without her he won't be able to manage anything, worries too that he dies first because what is she going to do all alone... etc. She seems to get anxious very easily for any little detail.

Although all this reasons might seem legit, it's all just a bunch of useless worrying about the future. As of today, she has enough delicious food to eat every day on the table, she has all the medicines she needs, and my grandpa too, she has us, her family, and also a nurse to take care of them, she has a nice house, she is even pretty healthy! ...and I could really continue to make the list longer.

How can I make her see that?? I don't want her to spend the last period of her life being miserable worrying about everything. First I thought I should listen to everything she had to tell me, because sometimes you just need to speak out, but I'm now realizing it's actually only getting worst. Every time I'm there she has some new worry to tell me about. I want her to notice that for today she can be happy and feel grateful, and if some obstacle comes up in the future, we'll figure it out together. Don't think I haven't told her this already, I have, but... she needs to move into the present! She keeps her mind in an obscure and terrifying imaginary future.

Any ideas? Thank you so much! :)

Edited by Mondsee

"Es gibt die Wahrheit, mein Lieber! Aber die ,Lehre', die du begehrst [...], die gibt es nicht. Du sollst dich auch gar nicht nach einer vollkommenen Lehre sehnen, Freund, sondern nach Vervollkommnung deiner selbst."

- Herman Hesse, Das Glasperlenspiel

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Do something nice for her what will keep her in the present. :)

Edited by clytaemnestra
typo

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5 hours ago, clytaemnestra said:

Do something nice for her what will keep her in the present. :)

Hmmm yeah... I'll go with her to get some ice cream or something...


"Es gibt die Wahrheit, mein Lieber! Aber die ,Lehre', die du begehrst [...], die gibt es nicht. Du sollst dich auch gar nicht nach einer vollkommenen Lehre sehnen, Freund, sondern nach Vervollkommnung deiner selbst."

- Herman Hesse, Das Glasperlenspiel

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1 hour ago, Mondsee said:

Hmmm yeah... I'll go with her to get some ice cream or something...

I was thinking like, make a family gathering for example, so she's surrounded by her family and sees how much everyone loves her and doesn't think about future. 

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@clytaemnestra oh! she's very very often surrounded by her family. Most of her closest family members are almost neighbors.


"Es gibt die Wahrheit, mein Lieber! Aber die ,Lehre', die du begehrst [...], die gibt es nicht. Du sollst dich auch gar nicht nach einer vollkommenen Lehre sehnen, Freund, sondern nach Vervollkommnung deiner selbst."

- Herman Hesse, Das Glasperlenspiel

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