advice on Making a girl invest in a relationship

[Vercingetorix]

I have a female friend (the one I posted about a month or two ago) that her and me are getting closer in our friendship. I do like her romantically but even just being friends with her makes me happy.  I think that she likes me too but the thing which prevents her from feeling enough attraction for me to want to be together is that she doesn't invest much in the relationship - It feels as if it's a bit one sided - I mostly help and support her. The main reason for that is that she is going through a rough period  in life: she just started therapy recently and she is facing a lot of pain, anxiety, fears and traumas and in general I just want to be there to help and support her. I search for a WIN WIN relationship and if we stay just close friends - I'm happy about it. But I do think it's possible for us to have a WIN WIN romantic relationship and the thing that I Know from attraction theory is that It's important for a girl to feel she invests in the relationship to feel attraction. And I was thinking that this is the thing that is lacking. So I an wondering how to make her invest more in the relationship? I also think that this question is manipulative and one part of me doesn't like. 
So if I would like a relationship that we invest the same amount of energy and time in each other - how do I make it so from the place that I'm at -Which is more 70%-30% investment levels, in non manipulative ways?




 

[LordFall]

Do you have other women in your life that are showing interest in you and what value do you offer as a man besides emotional support? Sounds to me like she's not romantically/sexually interested in you and you're hoping to change her mind with being her emotional tampon.

Beware, that's how the most toxic relationships form even if you do manage to convince her to date you.

[StarStruck]

Being a beta orbiter won't get you what you want. It is nice that you are nice to her (being friends is being nice for being nice) but it sounds to me like you are nice to her to get something from her: sex, intimacy and other things. She can't read your mind. You basically have to play open deck with her and tell her what you told us in this thread and hope for the best. Because if you have beta orbited her for a while she might have forgotten you have a dick. The best strategy would be to not tell her out of the blue, but build it up with small indirect remarks that you like her.

Edited September 20, 2022 by StarStruck

[Vercingetorix]

@LordFall  I practice day game pretty regularly And I have a date or two per week but I kind of lost interest in other girls for now. I feel like I have to sort this thing with her first.
Why do yo think so? and what's wrong with supporting friends emotionally? There is a good chance she is not interested and that's ok for me. But in the case that she is - I would like  to play my cards right.

@StarStruck I did tell her a few times that's I'm interested in the past, and at those time she she was not. Since then the dynamics of our relationship changed - we got much closer - so I think there is a chance she is starting to develop feeling for me but I don't know. I'm pretty open with her and I think the best option is to seize the moment, next time we have an intimate moment I will test to see if she is attracted. 

[integral]

On 9/20/2022 at 4:26 PM, Vercingetorix said:

Why do yo think so? and what's wrong with supporting friends emotionally? There is a good chance she is not interested and that's ok for me. But in the case that she is - I would like  to play my cards right.

How do you support them emotionally? There is a masculine and feminine way to do it and the right special mix. 

Edited September 21, 2022 by integral

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPH7KnLviTw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnqOxQBdqc0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwtfDsZHY2g

 

[integral]

21 minutes ago, Raze said:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPH7KnLviTw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnqOxQBdqc0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwtfDsZHY2g

??????

[Razard86]

1 hour ago, Raze said:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPH7KnLviTw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnqOxQBdqc0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwtfDsZHY2g

 

I've not once every clicked on your videos...but your copy paste method is applaudable. You are like....I'm tired of even saying anything at this point!!! Copy Paste Send!!!

[Devin]

Invest less in the relationship, she's in a hard time and maybe not in a place for romance.

[Vercingetorix]

@integral Mostly listening to her, reflecting her, giving her my perspective and understanding on what she shares. Asking questions to guide her to the root of stuff. Helping her see the positive, her resources, her greatness. Hugging and caressing her when she cries. sprinkling a bit of humor when appropriate.
We also do things together for fun like cooking, going to the beach.

@Raze Thanks, I'm watching!

@Devin Possible. but even if that's the case I enjoy to invest in her right now. It does conflict a bit with other dating opportunities I have so I think If in the next 1-2 meetings the relationship remains platonic, I will open it up with up, make sure what she wants and if she is not interested in anything romantic or sexual - I think I will naturally start to invest more in other girls and less with her.

Btw I have an important update, She said she is gonna bake me a pie  level of investment over 9000! problem solved??