Black girlfriend rejected by family

[Manny]

Hello,

In in a 1,5 year relationship with a black girl from Ghana. I'm a white male from Belgium i met her and since then it all just worked out. She met most of my friend and family and she is accepted by everyone and they are mostly just very happy for us. I never met her parents or family because she said that in her culture is not that easy to just go with an white man from on other country. Her family lives here in Belgium for 23 years now. I told here many times that i want to meet her family buth she just waited and waited and waited. Just Yesterday she graduated from University so i wanted to come to her last day in school. I met her parents there for the first time so i tried to introduce myself to them.. Pretty much they let me know that they are not happy with me and let me feel like i dont exist and rejected me and dont wanted to talk to me. I just said that i understand buth that i dont want to ignore them.. We planned a vacation next Monday two months ago to Kroatië. Now im a little bit disappointed and "mad" because her family doesnt even know me and she said almost nothing to here parents or family about me. My girlfriend doesnt want to cause any drama so she did nothing. I really dont feel respected or welcome by both her family and my girlfriend because she did almost nothing to introduce me to here family. After this evening i dropped her at home and we almost said nothing. I really want to go on vacation with here because i really adore here buth after yesterday i really doubt if she is serious with me. If she cancel the vacation on last minute i really think that is the end of the relationship because i dont realy now what else to do. Should i give her more time? Or just give up and leave. I dont want to bother here or make here life difficult. I just dont know what to do. Any tips please? Thank you!!

[Manny]

Feels like every move a make at this point is the wrong one.. buth when i do nothing then nothing gonna change

[petar8p]

Your relationship seems cracky. Do you truly love her? Or are you in a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship?

Obviously she know her parent's stances on white males so anything more she says to them about you is insufficient. 

 

You cannot change this and you don't have to be liked by her family. Make a family with her and create good boundaries. 

 

Where do you go in Croatia?

[Manny]

@petar8p off course i love her 

[LSD-Rumi]

@Manny Dude, what do you want with her family? She told you her family are  regressive and won't accept you, so why do you want to get know them? Just ignore them all together and focus on your relationship with your girl. 

For me, I would be happy if I never meet my gf's parents, who wants to waste time with old people, lol 

Edited September 18, 2022 by LSD-Rumi

[Tyler Robinson]

You shouldn't have to worry about the family. Do what you like. You like the girl and the girl likes you, I don't see why there should be a problem. 

 

[nowornever21]

tough one, she may be wasting your time. 

my advice would be to tread with caution. Did she come with you on holiday?

I am assuming you are still young so that can work in your favour. Continue on with the 'relationship' but just know in the back of your head that it is very possible she can leave you at any time. 

 

[Razard86]

On 9/17/2022 at 2:31 AM, Manny said:

Hello,

In in a 1,5 year relationship with a black girl from Ghana. I'm a white male from Belgium i met her and since then it all just worked out. She met most of my friend and family and she is accepted by everyone and they are mostly just very happy for us. I never met her parents or family because she said that in her culture is not that easy to just go with an white man from on other country. Her family lives here in Belgium for 23 years now. I told here many times that i want to meet her family buth she just waited and waited and waited. Just Yesterday she graduated from University so i wanted to come to her last day in school. I met her parents there for the first time so i tried to introduce myself to them.. Pretty much they let me know that they are not happy with me and let me feel like i dont exist and rejected me and dont wanted to talk to me. I just said that i understand buth that i dont want to ignore them.. We planned a vacation next Monday two months ago to Kroatië. Now im a little bit disappointed and "mad" because her family doesnt even know me and she said almost nothing to here parents or family about me. My girlfriend doesnt want to cause any drama so she did nothing. I really dont feel respected or welcome by both her family and my girlfriend because she did almost nothing to introduce me to here family. After this evening i dropped her at home and we almost said nothing. I really want to go on vacation with here because i really adore here buth after yesterday i really doubt if she is serious with me. If she cancel the vacation on last minute i really think that is the end of the relationship because i dont realy now what else to do. Should i give her more time? Or just give up and leave. I dont want to bother here or make here life difficult. I just dont know what to do. Any tips please? Thank you!!

Question are you the type that likes to be liked by everybody, and believes if everyone gives you a chance they would realize how much of a swell guy you are? If this is the case I got some bad news for you, no matter what you do in life some people are not going to like you. They don't even need a reason. Some people won't like you because of your nose, your ears, your eyes, your personality, your clothes, your race, your accent, your country of birth, your religion, your political party, the way you walk, what street you live on.....you get where I am going with this?

So yeah man...in the words of one my closest friends "You ain't shit to somebody." 

Edited September 22, 2022 by Razard86

[Javfly33]

On 18/9/2022 at 3:17 AM, LSD-Rumi said:

@Manny Dude, what do you want with her family? She told you her family are  regressive and won't accept you, so why do you want to get know them? Just ignore them all together and focus on your relationship with your girl. 

For me, I would be happy if I never meet my gf's parents, who wants to waste time with old people, lol 

exactly

[JJfromSwitzerland]

46 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

Question are you the type that likes to be liked by everybody, and believes if everyone gives you a chance they would realize how much of a swell guy you are? If this is the case I got some bad news for you, no matter what you do in life some people are not going to like you. They don't even need a reason. Some people won't like you because of your nose, your ears, your eyes, your personality, your clothes, your race, your accent, your country of birth, your religion, your political party, the way you walk, what street you live on.....you get where I am going with this?

So yeah man...in the words of one my closest friends "You ain't shit to somebody." 

Best advice!