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Awakening is not what I thought it would be

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First of all, thank you Leo, you've helped me on this journey so much, and second of all - awakening is just pure math equation , don't know how to explain it, most importantly don't know why I need to explain it, but basically it's just math that goes beyond infinity.  Is it the greatest feeling I ever had and is it everlasting? Yes and yes

One thing that I see all teachers miss is schizophrenia , or negative dimension , I call it the negative ego, it's not the type of ego that tells you negative things, it's like the negative numbers, or the space that bends inside out on itself, where the ego is located , basically reversed ego, but if ego is already reversed in its nature that would make it a positive ego, where you feel suffering but you think that you feel pleasure at the same time, it's impossible to explain but it is a thing I had to fall in love with too, and I straight up had to imagine infinite hopelessness  and fall in love with it lol 

Also love is not an embrace of things, I wouldn't call it love, it more so works that if some feeling is under your field of consciousness it can't harm you, but if it's above you then it will literally have power over you, so it's not really love it's more like having power over a thing

I could go on and on but to summarize it, I'm really excited for my future, because this whole spiritual journey was started to just be myself , but for me it's a much, much broader notion than you could realize, not just going to psychotherapy or whatever. And lastly, the meaning of life is indeed 42 , thank you 

 

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Well, I'm grateful my awakening experiences have nothing to do with math because I'm terrible at it. Hah

So long and thanks for all the fish.

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On 9/15/2022 at 6:28 AM, dj_img said:

First of all, thank you Leo, you've helped me on this journey so much, and second of all - awakening is just pure math equation , don't know how to explain it, most importantly don't know why I need to explain it, but basically it's just math that goes beyond infinity.  Is it the greatest feeling I ever had and is it everlasting? Yes and yes

One thing that I see all teachers miss is schizophrenia , or negative dimension , I call it the negative ego, it's not the type of ego that tells you negative things, it's like the negative numbers, or the space that bends inside out on itself, where the ego is located , basically reversed ego, but if ego is already reversed in its nature that would make it a positive ego, where you feel suffering but you think that you feel pleasure at the same time, it's impossible to explain but it is a thing I had to fall in love with too, and I straight up had to imagine infinite hopelessness  and fall in love with it lol 

Also love is not an embrace of things, I wouldn't call it love, it more so works that if some feeling is under your field of consciousness it can't harm you, but if it's above you then it will literally have power over you, so it's not really love it's more like having power over a thing

I could go on and on but to summarize it, I'm really excited for my future, because this whole spiritual journey was started to just be myself , but for me it's a much, much broader notion than you could realize, not just going to psychotherapy or whatever. And lastly, the meaning of life is indeed 42 , thank you 

 

Interesting perspective, I hope to hear how your perspective changes with each new experience.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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