Ask A Girl Where You Went Wrong If She Rejects You?

[Peace and Love]

@electroBeam

Also keep in mind that relationship experience and training doesn't stop at pickup.  I'm sure you know that just picking up a chick/ aka asking for her number doesn't make you a master at finding the right girl.  There is much to learn when going on dates, and having a relationship, sex, good conversation, etc.

Episode #2!!!! lol And my TERRIBLE ADVICE!!

I wanted to share some dating experiences with you about why I personally decided not to go out on a second date with certain men.  I also wanted to tell you about something that recently happened.....my mom broke up with Mark!!!  (The Salad dressing technique guy!!! and it's for good!!!)

My mom and Mark... I was so sure they  were going to get married.  My mom was very happy, but I learned something really important when it comes to dating.  You really have to love yourself and be comfortable with who you are.  That is so very important.  Mark was not comfortable with who he was.  He didn't have BALANCE in his life.  He was overworked and he had a 21 autistic son that he took care of part of the time and he refused to ask for help with his son's care so he was consistently worn out. (Tommy is on the opposite side of the spectrum, very low functioning, complete opposite of Aspergers, he has been permanently stuck at a 5 year old mentality and learning curve for many years!) Mark suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from being in the military.  He also ended on a really bad note with his previous marriage.  He never forgave himself or other people.  He never let go, and held grudges and had anger issues.  He didn't do the personal development inner work to heal and start feeling confident about himself again.  My mom and I wanted to be apart of Mark's life, and most of all my mom and I really wanted to help his son, Tommy.  My mom and I already had made plans on how to improve Tommy's well being and with the little exposure we had to his son we had already seen significant changes.  My mom and I are both devastated by the turn of events, but we know it was for the best because my mom deserved so much better.  Because Mark was not feeling good about himself, he sabotaged his own happiness and a relationship that should have never happened in the first place.  Mark mastered pick up, but he didn't master his own heart!  He destroyed the very thing he wanted!  To be with my mom!  How fricken sad!!

My dating experiences.......  The guys that never made bf status.  What did they do wrong??     Names have been changed to protect the innocent and the really stupid!

1.)  2 years ago I graduated with my hypnosis certification and attended this big social networking event with my instructor.  It was held at this really nice 12 story Condo, in their activity center that was at the very top of the building.  It had a gorgeous view of the entire city and the local shopping area.  While I was there, I met this guy named Greg.  He happened to live in the condo and he was visiting the activity center with his 7 year old daughter to show her the beautiful view and the stars.  This guy introduced himself with his daughter and gave me his business card.  He was friendly, engaging, and we talked for a few minutes.  I'm usually not interested in men that have kids, especially since I'm single and have none of my own.  He was definitely one of the exceptions to the rule.  And seriously...this guy was pick up master level 100!  He had his fricken kid and I was interested! lol  So I went on this date with this guy Greg.  And he was absolutely amazing.  He was attractive, he knew how to dress.  He wore form fitting clothes, and he smelled wonderful  He also was bald!!  I wanted to mention this because I've seen a few men on this forum that are insecure about their receding hair line. I've found a video showing that the shaved head look is one of the top attractive hair styles for men!   Anyways, Greg and I  met at this Japanese restaurant, and come to find out he had a PHD in Physics!!  I've always had a thing for extremely intelligent men, so me and him completely hit it off.  (And this guy wasn't even a gamer!!  And I usually go for gamer men! lol)  We talked at the restaurant for a few hours and then we walked outside window shopping and in the park.  He was just absolutely amazing.  He was the very first man that I dated when I came back home to Virginia to be with my parents.  He was romantic, he held my hand, we had great conversation.  His attractiveness level was definitely a 10 out of 10.   He was literally the perfect guy all in one package! 

But.......I chose not to go on a second date.  WAIT.....WHAT?!?!?  Are you NUTS???? 

Red flag #1:  He had his ex wife's name tattooed on his hand.

Red flag #2: He wasn't looking for a serious relationship.  In fact he was into having open relationships, with multiple women! lol Yes I kid you not, this really happened. He was just like Mark....he allowed his ex wife to completely mind f*ck him and didn't do the inner  work to start trusting again.  His ex wife was in love with another man, and was having an open relationship while she was still married to Greg!  And he allowed it! It totally screwed him up big time, so he was stuck in this "I'm never ever going to love another woman again" BS.   We are what we believe ourselves to be.


Last year in the summer I had a free 7 day trial of match.com, so I decided to go on a bunch of dates that week as much as I could and see what happens! lol  These are my experiences.....

1.)  The first guy I met was Jared. He was a professional Chef and I met him at this nice restaurant.  I decided I really wanted to prove that I do look like my pictures since so many dating sites complain that nobody puts actual pictures of what they look like anymore.  So I dressed up nicely.  I curled hair, put on this nice dress, etc.  So I met this guy, and first off he was completely intimidated by the way I looked.  Which was a red flag for me.  I wanted someone that was confident.  And I was surprised because he was a bit older than me, early 40's.  He was shy, so we didn't have that connection like I did with Greg that I so desperately wanted to recreate.  After dinner we went bowling and played at the arcade.  We acted like kids and it was very liberating and something I look for in a guy, but the connection wasn't there that I wanted.  The lack of confidence and communication was such a big turn off.  Of course the guy wanted a kiss at the end of the day....lol let's say he didn't get one and I never called back.

2.)  The second guy  I met was really cool.  His name was Ryan and he was a professional indie Game designer and had just released a game for the PS4 that he had worked on by himself for the last 2 years!!! We talked on skype for 8 HOURS STRAIGHT!!! lol We just totally clicked online.  He looked HOTT in his pictures!  He was definitely my type!  However when I met him in person, it was a very different story.....He didn't look like his pictures at all.  His face was puffy, he had gained weight and he wasn't taking care of himself.  He told me that he had just recently recovered from kidney cancer, and he almost didn't make it.  This was very hard for me to swallow, especially since my dad had stage four terminal colon cancer.  I could see by the way he was eating he probably wouldn't have lasted very long, and we definitely would not have a good sexual relationship if I pursued anything.  He definitely would not be able to satisfy in bed! lol  HEALTH is VERY IMPORTANT!!  Also besides the gaming stuff unfortunately we didn't have anything else in common!  There is this huge spiritual side that was untapped that he could not relate to or understand.  He wasn't into personal development, so I could see our conversations and chemistry would be based off of gaming interests, which wasn't enough for me.  Since gaming is not a primary thing in my life anymore. He got the kiss, but he didn't get the second date.

3.) The third guy I met Cameron, was actually from facebook.  He was friends with someone I went to college with.  We had a lot in common: he was vegan, he was a gamer/cosplayer, he liked art and was into photography, and he loved to kayak (which is something i love to do!)  So I added him on facebook, liked a couple pictures on his page, left a comment about kayaking....etc....he figured it out and pursued me after that! lol  So we talked back and forth on facebook for about a month, and then he invited me to his birthday party he was having at a Irish Pub with a bunch of his friends.  Of course he tried to entice me with vegan tiramisu for his birthday cake...lol I couldn't resist! So I meet this guy. I loved his friends.  These were the type of people I would totally chill with.   Unfortunately things didn't work out despite all the things we had in common and talked about online for over a month.  We definitely had established a good solid sense of communication.  Apparently I learned that talking online, and talking in person are two VERY different things!  You can be under an illusion of what the person is really like.  So I'm at the pub, and my date is getting totally sh*t faced drunk.  lol  Of course I naturally don't drink at all because of all my food allergies.  I had one, just to feel like I was part of the party but that was it.  Cameron was trying to force the whole kissing thing and was trying to get me drunk....lol...yeah right...good luck buddy! The major red flag was that the guy told me at the end of the night that the whole reason he wanted to get remarried (was divorced for over a year) and specifically have kids was because his dad wanted grandchildren and was going to pay off his school loans if he had kids!! Yes he really told me that! TRUE STORY.   I left, the guy didn't get the kiss, the end!

4.) By this time I was really getting annoyed with the types of men I was encountering.  I started to take things into my own hands.  So i did a refined search on match.com for specific types of men with very specific qualities I was looking for, including zodiac stuff, and putting in key words like meditation and enlightenment.  I ended up with like 3 or 4 guys in the results and I each contacted them.  Quality over quantity. Most of them were inactive which was a bummer, but I did get one!  His name was Derek.  He lived two hours away, but it was worth the drive.  We met up at a half way point and went bowling and had dinner.  Derek and I had a lot in common. He was into spiritually, and enlightenment, but was also a gamer.  I'll keep it brief out of respect for the guy, and of course I changed his name. In fact at one point he was somewhat of a famous celebrity and had gamer rap videos all over youtube.com.  Out of the guys I met on match he was the only one that I continued to date after the first initial date.  He was just perfect.... We dated for about a month, and we were both head over heals for each other. One date we went to a park during the summer time and meditated.  He also had the healing energy ability like i did, and we would send energy to each other.  It was amazing.  After having a really intimate experience with him one night, I did a hypnosis session for relaxation as well as reiki on him.  He wanted to do this, and he enjoyed it.  However this time, the reiki did something that I wasn't expecting....since it's spiritually guided energy and it goes for where the healing is needed most.... it effected him on a subconscious level, and lets just say I found out things that most women would not find out about a man unless they dated him for atleast a year or two ..my healing abilities literally saved me from wasting my time in an relationship with a man that didn't deserve me and my love....the following weeks after that instance i discovered who he really was.  I found out he lied about certain things.  Dishonesty is such a big NO NO.....  He was trying to be more spiritual to impress me, and played down his gamer side like it would keep me attracted to him.  He tried to manipulate things.... I gave him several chances, which is pretty rare for me to do with any guy period...because i thought he was worth it....he screwed up big time, and he even came after me several times to try to win me back (after his final last chance) and he has been permanently placed in the the "friend zone" arena.


Like i said in my original first post to you, Men make things harder and more complicated than it has be.  Just be a friend and be yourself.  Love yourself, and take care of your body.  Dress well (with form fitting clothes) and smell good (take a shower!)  it's surprising how many men don't realize how much smell plays a big part in attraction.  I have placed men in permanent friend zone status based off smell alone! You can't force or manipulate someone to love or like you.   And that goes both ways with the sexes, men and women. Love comes naturally on it's own from being yourself.   And if things don't work out it's for a very good reason, and sometimes you won't understand at all and just have to trust it for the better!  And sometimes it's not your fault at all and has absolutely nothing to do with you, but the other person has some mentally mind f*cking issues in his head that prevent him and sabotage himself from having a loving relationship.



 

[Peace and Love]

@electroBeam  @Shin @Steph1988 @Leo Gura @Elton @Principium Nexus @Space @ElenaO

Oh I wanted to mention something about my previous comment I left last night...I completely forgot.  (My Episode 2 advice)

The guy I went on a date with 2  years ago, Greg., he did in fact ask me WHY I didn't go on a second date with him on facebook about a week later.  And I did tell him the truth, no lies, no bs, no coverups.  I felt because it was an instant messenger conversation rather than face to face or by phone it was a lot easier to be honest with him. Plus he was such a great guy.  He had mastered pickup and dealing with women.   I didn't feel threatened or uncomfortable talking about it.  We had established good communication in person when we went on our date. He was non judgemental, easy to talk to, and he was very emotionally developed. I just told him I wasn't into having multiple relationships, or an open relationship.  I was looking for a serious committed relationship with one person. I wasn't mean about it.  I was kind and understanding of his situation and why he had gone down this road.  We stayed good friends on face book.  And he just recently moved to San Francisco to start a new job! 

My mom and I also recently talked about this thread.  And she could not agree more with me, about talking about why things didn't work out.  And as I'm typing this I'm thinking about other examples that are popping into my head...lol I think I'm going to need to write an episode 3 at some point!  Communication is key in any relationship.  It's how you carry and handle yourself.  If you're calm and collected, why wouldn't someone not want to be honest with you? 

 

[Shin]

17 hours ago, Peace and Love said:

If you're calm and collected, why wouldn't someone not want to be honest with you? 

 

It is more a matter of being honest with yourself.

Plenty of people want to be honest, they are just afraid to be vulnerable/rejected in doing so.

Edited February 25, 2017 by Shin

[Peace and Love]

@Shin @electroBeam  True that!

Just now, Shin said:

It is more a matter of being honest with yourself.

Plenty of people want to be honest, they are just afraid to be vulnerable in doing so.

 

[electroBeam]

@Peace and Love  but whats the point of doing pickup if love is just something you cant control? There is literally no reason for it if that's the case. That's an entire industry down the drain. 

[Toby]

It's like marketing. You can make some people buy certain things with certain tricks but it doesn't mean they need or actually want the product. Even if before buying they were excited about it.

[Shin]

3 hours ago, electroBeam said:

@Peace and Love  but whats the point of doing pickup if love is just something you cant control? There is literally no reason for it if that's the case. That's an entire industry down the drain. 

Eliminating a part of your anxiety around women.

It won't solve everything, because the need for love isn't about not being good with women, it is about not realizing that you aren't a separate entity from the whole, which is what spirituality is about.

Quote

George Santayana said, paraphrasing, that we are not in love with the person but in our projection of the person

Yes, and this is why spirituality is important, because it is only through this that you can see that everything a reflection of you

Edited February 25, 2017 by Shin

[Morten]

@Shin Perfect description!

Many of their advice can assist you to relax around them and when you are relaxed conversation flows naturally, like with your buddies. "Shit tests" are completely ignored and passed when you are relaxed.

For example, take into the account difference between chatting with a girl online or via text messages and chatting in person. I personally can chat over internet a lot, relax them, make them laugh and get them to a date. However in person it is a completely different situation. Perhaps it has to do with their projected image of me. Just to clarify, they could see my picture

George Santayana said, paraphrasing, that we are not in love with the person but in our projection of the person

[sweater]

?

[Flare]

Really bizarre thread here. Many difficult believes flying around. 

@electroBeam You gotta be able to distinguish between love and attraction. Your love for your partner is the same as for your mother (maybe not as intense or even more intense), but hopefully your attracted to your partner (or girl you just met etc.) and not your mother. First is about spirituality and your own being, second can be achieved trough pure skills, even though it's a hell of a lot easier with inner game and it's way more healthy.

By the way, that it would be a whole industry down the drain is not an argument. If the industry was shit and good at selling shit, it would still suck, even though many would fall for the trap. Example: McDonalds. Would you argue McDonalds is healthy then? Otherwise it would be down the drain.

Pick up does work. You just have to see it for what it really is (for).

Edited February 25, 2017 by Flare

[Peace and Love]

@electroBeam @Elton @Principium Nexus

15 hours ago, electroBeam said:

@Peace and Love  but whats the point of doing pickup if love is just something you cant control? There is literally no reason for it if that's the case. That's an entire industry down the drain. 

Pick up increases your ability to attract the right girl and keep her by TENFOLD!  I can recall numerous men that I've been attracted to that are usually not my type at all.

Here are some examples.....lol  Episode #3

1.)  A few years ago when I was living in south Florida I met this older man named Robbie.  He was 50 years old, 6ft 4,  but he had the face and body of a 35  year old,  and a full head of dark thick hair!  He was vegan and because of his diet and taking care of his body, he reversed and slowed down the aging process.  Well atleast I can say it worked for him.  I'm usually not attracted to older men at all, and he was certainly the oldest man I've ever been attracted to.   And I met him when I was 29. He was one of the most influential men if not the most in my life.  He has a very special place in my heart, that no man has been able to replicate.  He was my superman.  When I met him, I was very sick, and overly medicated.  He helped educate me on vegan dieting and helped me to reverse my serious health issues that I had, including my ovarian cysts which could have made me permanently infertile.  He was extremely intelligent and was always teaching me new things.  He taught me to research, and read things before i made decisions.  We had the most incredibly intense sexual chemistry.  And this man wasn't even a gamer or my type!  A lot of the attraction we had was emotional, and was built over time.  He was one of the most interesting people that I ever talked to or met.  It was a shame that we had met at the wrong time.  Even though he asked me out nearly 4 times in a span of 3 years, the universe deemed that we were not meant to be together!  There was a fine line between being incredibly in love with this man and lusting.  After I moved back home to live with my parents and spend time with my dad while he was still alive, I literally pined over this man.  I even secretly contemplated for a while on dropping my career in hypnosis and running away to be with him! lol.  Love and lust makes you do crazy things!   And he certainly beat the odds! 

2.)  2 years ago when I was taking my Masters in Hypnotherapy I met this guy on my facebook named Kris. If there is such a thing as the term "soul mate", this man was definitely it.  We could literally complete each others sentences, and we had so much in common it would make anyone puke.  We would talk for hours upon hours online, laughing and giggling.  We were literally two peas in a pod.  I've had a lot of wild spiritual things happen in my life involving birds and there was something going on there between me and Kris.  We even had shared some identical dreams which made me contemplate if we had met in a past life or astro-planed, etc. Unfortunately Kris lived across the USA in Washington State.  He was a game designer that worked in the industry for many years, including with big companies like Bungie Games, and Microsoft. He even worked on my all time favorite game Kings Quest 6!!!  Kris was going through a lot in his life.  His best friend passed away on vacation in another country, his dog died, and his ex wife that he was married to for ten years left him and moved to Puerto Rico to live with an 18 year old man.  (We're talking about someone that's in their late 30's early 40's here!)  Because of all these series of unfortunate events Kris gained a ton of weight, and was sporting this ugly straggly beard that turned a 30  year old man into a 50/60 year old man!.  He literally had aged from all the stress.  And it was very hard for me to swallow.  I wanted to make things work, and see healing take place with this man.  He needed time, but unfortunately he lived too far away to make things work. 

3.) Greg from episode 2, was definitely another great example of someone that is usually not my type.  I think many of us have a tendency to get into dating patterns.  I've always been drawn to men with dark hair and dark eyes, not to say I wouldn't be attracted to anything else, I just think it was just natural for me because my dad had those very same features.  Greg was bald, and had pretty light blue eyes.  He also had a 7 year old daughter.  Usually I refuse to date men with kids, because there is a possibility that I might have to take on that "mommy role", and I haven't personally come to the decision in my life on whether or not I really want to have kids!  He made me seriously consider that! lol

4.)  One of my ex best friends was another exception to the rule.  We never dated because he was in a serious committed relationship with someone else the majority of the time we knew each other.  This guy was a bi-sexual man, that was in a gay relationship.  He was also very influential in my life because he taught me how to be more feminine and dress attractively.  I grew up not knowing how to put on makeup, and how to really take care of my hair and look beautiful.  I grew up as a nerd, and was considered the nerdiest kid in the 6th grade!  This man changed all of  that for me.  And I started getting all this masculine attention I never really received before.  He would make me laugh so hard, and we would make the craziest jokes with each other.  We almost had like this brother, sister close relationship.  If my friend was not in the relationship he was in, we most likely would have dated.  He had more of the sporty/rocker look.  It's not that he wasn't attractive, it's just that he wasn't physically my type, or someone that I would normally go for.  He wasn't a gamer dude, but we both had a strong interest in personal development and making ourselves better.   (He was a close "runner up" with Robbie and the influence he had on my life.)


I will be honest.  The majority of men out there I'm not physically attracted to at all.  For men physical attraction is a big deal, but for women we need things to be a lot deeper on a an emotional level.  Physically unattractive men that I do have a connection with can easily become my type by doing simple things to improve their appearance- dressing better, putting on some nice cologne, and a good hair style, and facial hair shaping.    Men that are emotionally stable and balanced can go from a 2 to 10 instantly with the right clothes and hair cut!  Pick up is most definitely worth your time and effort!  And most importantly the inner work that it will create within you is priceless.

Edited February 26, 2017 by Peace and Love
grammar

[Colin]

@Peace and Love  teach me oh relationship guru, for I am very ignorant in this area of life.

[jse]

[Peace and Love]

@I_Like_Thing

1 hour ago, I_Like_Thing said:

Peace and Love is an eloquent writer, and she is super knowledgeable on the subject. Have you considered having a Love and Relationship channel? There are some of those, but few as well spoken and knowledgeable as you obviously are.

@Colin

 

22 hours ago, Colin said:

@Peace and Love  teach me oh relationship guru, for I am very ignorant in this area of life.

Awww you guys are too kind!  You're making me melt!!!  I honestly don't consider myself a guru. LEO is the guru!!!  (Besides I haven't even met Mr. Right as of yet! lol)  I've been through a lot in my life, and I discovered that many people seem to benefit and appreciate when I share my personal experiences (both dating, and non dating related).  I feel, sympathize, and understand a lot of men's pain that I don't think a lot of women can comprehend because I worked in adult entertainment for several years.  I've had a ton of exposure to many different types of men and I always felt that I was playing the "sex therapist" role for men.

I may be by no means a dating expert, but I can tell you what I do know...  Episode #4!!  

Step 1:  Before you start getting into dating, I can not strongly emphasize how important it is to love yourself!  I mean this is REALLY a BIG DEAL!   You really can't love another person unless you fully and unconditionally love yourself.  Yeah...of course you can be a in a long term relationship, and things can work, but you really won't have that satisfaction you are looking for until you fulfill your inner self.  Self love changes you.  It gives your life, and it gives you PASSION. You're not even the same person anymore.  And when you love yourself you won't put up with anyone else's crap.  It helps you avoid abuse, and alleviate repetitive negative dating patterns.  You feel a sense of peace and awe with yourself.  You are comfortable in your own skin and people are drawn to you like bees to honey.  When you love yourself you have something called BOUNDARIES.  Boundaries are actually a form of self love, and lets other people know what is ok and NOT ok.  How you should and shouldn't be treated. Boundaries need to be created to promote respect in a relationship.

There are a lot of LONELY people in this world.  They feel that they NEED someone to fulfill them.  To make them feel whole and complete. Love doesn't work that way.  If you're life is like a beautifully baked cake, the loving romantic relationship is like the cherry on top.  A loving relationship doesn't make you complete, but enhances who you are. What makes up the cake is the rest of you....your hobbies, your talents, your life purpose, friends, family, your health and how you take care of yourself, etc..  All those beautiful things put together make up your beautiful CAKE OF LIFE!  And to create this beautiful cake of life you need something called BALANCE.  Balance is so important.  Yeah it's nice to focus on meditating and enlightenment all the time, but we all know that we need to LIVE.  What many people don't know is that when we crave to be in a relationship, it is actually a sign of being UNBALANCED.  We are using the relationship to fill a void in something we don't feel adequate about.   Ask yourself...are you using relationships as a form of a security blanket?  Some people use relationships to feel better about themselves (SELF ESTEEM) others use it to feel validated and feel wanted and needed (which could mean they don't love themselves enough, or don't have enough friends, or hobbies, or things to keep them busy).  Romantic relationships should never be sought out for emotional comfort.  ASK yourself...where can I create more balance in my life???  And make it happen!  It is worth the time and the wait to work on yourself.  You will not regret your decision if you put in the hard work and the effort.

I firmly believe that relationships are for us to help enhance spiritual growth.  When you are in a relationship it's not about satisfying you...it's about satisfying and serving the person you are with!  You become selfless!   My goal as of right now is to balance myself out, and discover an even deeper love within me....our real true selves.....from a higher consciousness and an enlightened perspective.

STEP 2:   After you have found and attained SELF LOVE.... this is what I would do NEXT!

I've listened to and watched a lot of Leo's videos on dating and sex.  And I'm not here to kiss his A$$ and get "brownie points" but he does seriously know what he's talking about.  (PLEASE WATCH HIS VIDEOS)  There are quite  a few books on Leo's book list that would be beneficial in helping one to have a healthy, passionate, and balanced relationship. I would read all of them, and become a MASTER of that knowledge.  There is also another book on his list under his "emotional master section" that talks about unconditional love.  Although I have not personally read this book as of yet, (I'm planning too soon) but I think there is a missing link here.  I think many of us really don't understand what real LOVE is.  We all need a firm grasp and understanding of what Love truly is.

This is a time to become excited about YOU! To have a life purpose and passion. Changing your thoughts and how you perceive life!  You need to start thinking:   "I love my thoughts.  They are my best friends"   (No really I'm serious...become your own best friend for REAL!!)

                    "I am on a path where positive thinking and an optimistic attitude guide all of my choices".   (Positive Emotional Mastery)

                      "Every moment presents a wonderful new opportunity to become more of who I am!"  (Living in the present moment, always seizing the day)


If you want to find, seek and acquire knowledge of  spiritual relationships this is what I've found so far.  
Book:  "Spiritual Partnership, The Journey of Authentic Power"  by Gary Zukav

Video:  The Nature of Nondual relationships  -  TRUST ME, It's worth the $10 bucks to watch this entire video!!!

http://shiningworld.com/site/shop/index.php?route=product/product&product_id=133


Once you have a solid idea of what kind of relationship you want, it's going to be a lot easier to attain it.



STEP 3:  You could also do this while completing step one and step two... Start taking care of your looks and your body.  But DO NOT do this to impress someone else, do this to impress you!  This is about feeling good about you.  Don't worry about the girl part, when you take care of  you, they WILL NOTICE.

Top 10 Most Attractive Men's Hair Styles:  Pick the one that looks most attractive on you.  One is not better than the other necessarily.  It's a matter of taste and style, and what makes you feel like YOU. 

What if I am going BALD?!?  What if I have a receding hair line???   Well.....the shaved head look happens to be one of the top 10 most attractive hair styles!!  Leo totally pulls it off!  And then to bring it over the top, get artistic and creative with the facial hair if needed. Grow a goatee!  Sport some side burns, mustache, beard, etc... It can really help to shape your face and give it more structure and angle.  This can really help you ALOT!

Sorry Leo, but you're such an awesome example!  (Maybe he'll just stay in the Enlightenment Section of the forums like he normally does, and will never see this post! lol quietly tip toeing......)

Like if you look at Leo's face, he has more of the round look, but he enhances his handsome facial features by his facial hair.  It like literally transformed his face.  He has the more chiseled look now because of his facial hair.   Keep in mind....Usually.....Women are enhanced by curves, but men become more attractive by angles and a more chiseled look.   This works really well for Leo! 











Top 10 Colognes Women Love:  Maybe I'm simple, and I'm a little biased but I like Gio, Georgio Armani Cologne. lol  Both of my long term bf's wore it.   Find one that you like and test it out!!!  Have fun with this!

WHAT TO WEAR??
How you dress is really important.  Look for clothes that are form fitting and enhance your body.  Do your RESEARCH.  You don't have to break the bank to look good! Look at what Leo is wearing in this video...it works really well for him!!  And the color is very flattering.  Wear colors that enhance your skin tone and your eyes!!!    Find out what colors look most flattering on you!!

 

Intimacy and SEX.... 
I'm keeping the words PG in here, because I really have no idea what kind of audience is looking at this....lol
Here is my ADVICE...
Trust me when I say this....DO NOT worry about the size of your anaconda.  It REALLY doesn't matter if it's a pencil or a soup can.  What matters is how you use it!!!  Master the art of the bedroom and keep both of you happy!  I cannot not over emphasize how many men I've met that are clueless when it comes to pleasing women, especially the younger generations.  It's really sad how selfish they can be.  Please don't be one of them, because in the end one of you will be dissatisfied and end up leaving.  No really....I"M FREAKING SERIOUS....don't worry about the size of your light saber. What matters is the intimacy.   Leo's videos really hit the mark here.  HIS TECHNIQUES DO WORK.  Learn to balance the masculine dominance  and the soft gentle playful side.  Women like that!

 

 

[Falk]

On 15.2.2017 at 11:34 AM, electroBeam said:

Has anyone been successful in figuring out how to ask a girl for dating/attraction feedback when she rejects you? I went cold approach today and found a girl, but she said she was too busy, so I asked her frankly in a playful way, where did i go wrong, and she didn't want to tell me and just kept laughing. This was on the phone btw. 

Has anyone else been successful in asking out girls who rejected them on where they went wrong? Like how will you improve if you're not entirely sure on what you did wrong in the first place.

Get ready bro!!! ...i´m going to brainstorm some crazy mofokin wisdoms on ya ass ...READY????  

1. Abundance mentality! She is NOT the one! She is one girl of many beautiful girls you will have in your life... don´t put her on a pedestal, don´t be needy. Scarecity leads to neediness, playing-safe-mode and weirdness!! BE ABUNDANT say it: there are 100s of girls for me in the next year alone, and this one is just one of those, i live in abundance!

2. It is a numbers game! Rejections are a necessary step to success! Always trust and stay in the abundant mindset and always review your interactions and learn from them!

3. Go get her! Be agressive, show clearity of intent!! Don´t be afraid to escalate.

4. Your life purpose is higher than any women! In general don´t let the women itself be the purpose or hope that she will be or that she will do things for you ...that´s just lazy and passive and castrated!! Don´t do this shit!

5. Be playful and free!! Show her she has no sexual power over you at all ...that will make her chase you! Set the right tone within the first 30seconds.

 

Also deepen your voice, talk slow and breaking raport

Eye contact – never be the first to look away (meditation helps)

Body language – alpha posture / lean back enjoy , you feel safe !

THESE are all honest signals that you are alpha, that you are high value and that you have gotten social proof in your life!!

if you take anything away from what i write here then it should be this!!!

 

6. Always be a leader, Trust yourself, Noone will trust yourself for you! Noone will give you the permission to love yourself and noone can validate that your life purpose is a good one ...you have to find that stuff in yourself! that´s what personal development is there for!!

 

7. Stay calm , when she wants to shit-test you with problems and objections just stay humorous and calm, ignore her shittest or misinteprete the shittests as sexual intent ...8 of 10 cases she will LOVE!!! this

 

8. Be authentic be honest. This doesnt mean you have to tell her your deepest fears and insecurities .(acutally NEVER DO THAT!! FORGET that shit when your mother told you to be open to a girl she didn´t gave you the advise you need to fuck her!! HAHA you know what i mean?) ...because you should not do that!! you have to resolve those problems on your own, because they are only in your head and in your body...BUT! Be honest and authentic in your actions and your intent towards her!

 

9. Stop taking value !! Give value !! you are the MAN!!

Happiniess is what you want , and counterintuitively Happyness doesn come from what you get! (the girl, the validation, the money, approval, status) but from what you can give to others!! Think about that!! What can you give??!!

 

10. self esteem

Is a product of an abundant mentality, beeing able to trust yourself, beeing active instead of reactive, leading her! Never be passive or dependent on her , that includes asking her what she thinks of you!! Don´t ask her what she thinks ... Make her think you are are higher value than her but display of confidence, social proof, self-esteem, beeing able to stfu from time to time and ability to show your sexuality and escalate ( in optimal chase you do invisbile escalation ...check out "todd valentine" for this one)

 

11. A women should, will and can not be the reason why you are happy in life!

WOW!!! this is a huge one for me, the women in itself is not the goal she is just the enabler to force yourself to become the best version of yourself.

 

You only get her if you don´t need her!!

You only get what you are willing to loose!!

 

 

NAMASTÉ MOFOS !!  

[Shin]

Quote

Intimacy and SEX.... 
I'm keeping the words PG in here, because I really have no idea what kind of audience is looking at this....lol
Here is my ADVICE...
Trust me when I say this....DO NOT worry about the size of your anaconda.  It REALLY doesn't matter if it's a pencil or a soup can.  What matters is how you use it!!!  Master the art of the bedroom and keep both of you happy!  I cannot not over emphasize how many men I've met that are clueless when it comes to pleasing women, especially the younger generations.  It's really sad how selfish they can be.  Please don't be one of them, because in the end one of you will be dissatisfied and end up leaving.  No really....I"M FREAKING SERIOUS....don't worry about the size of your light saber. What matters is the intimacy.   Leo's videos really hit the mark here.  HIS TECHNIQUES DO WORK.  Learn to balance the masculine dominance  and the soft gentle playful side.  Women like that!

This is the most important ^^

It doesn't matter how much sexy, smart, or funny you are, if you don't make the effort to please her in bed, it's all gonna fall down one way or another (unless she's a carpet).

Now if you're a virgin or have very little experience, that might be a problem, but not because you don't have any experience.

It's mostly because she's gonna wonder why, why does a guy that attracted me is still a virgin/have little experience ? Is he asexual/gay, or is he faking confidence ?

The trick is to know that you'll probably fail, but not because you're not sexually experienced, but because you'll be needy and won't be grounded in yourself, you'll see her as the women that finally saves you, you'll put her on a pedestal (you won't fuck her like you should because of that), and she will hate you for that.

So meditate and do personal developement like a motherfucker, THEN FAIL, realize that you don't need a women, meditate and do personal developement like a MOTHERFUCKER, and then if you feel like it, search an another woman.

The kind of women you'll be attracted and that you'll attract will be very different, and the relationship will be way much more interesting and satisfying.

WHY ?!

Because the relationship will be a bonus (you'll already be happy on your own), because you'll stop being fake, because you'll see the woman in front of you like a full fledged human being, and not some goddess without any flaws.

 

Hope that helps

Edited February 27, 2017 by Shin

[jse]

On 26/02/2017 at 9:11 AM, Peace and Love said:

Pick up increases your ability to attract the right girl and keep her by TENFOLD!

I'm so outta touch... Is this what pick up is about?

 

[Ajax]

On Wednesday, February 15, 2017 at 3:34 AM, electroBeam said:

Has anyone been successful in figuring out how to ask a girl for dating/attraction feedback when she rejects you? I went cold approach today and found a girl, but she said she was too busy, so I asked her frankly in a playful way, where did i go wrong, and she didn't want to tell me and just kept laughing. This was on the phone btw. 

Has anyone else been successful in asking out girls who rejected them on where they went wrong? Like how will you improve if you're not entirely sure on what you did wrong in the first place.

Hello electro,

My dear friend, I  don't believe female psychology  works like that. In fact I generally don't even trust my female friends about attracting women... sure they can give you pointers on the external... and that is great but it is not enough it is the internal game that get you results. You can look like Adonis but if something doesn't feel right to the woman then you won't attract her.

To be honest, just the fact that you asked that question shows that you really don't understand the female mentality which can be a handicap. The one thing I think is good to know is that they operate on feelings and feelings are not words... so that can be a problem.... Hell, it sometimes takes my wife between 10- 60 mins... to explain to what I did wrong and how she felt about it and I am actively digging out of her....it would be time well spent review the way of superior man...the section about dealing with women.

In short asking woman for feedback after hitting on them isn't going to be that helpful, bad idea imo it would probably will make them uncomfortable. 

Maybe if you make a survey and ask women questions about men in general and what the do wrong when they approach them. That way you can learn without the awkwardness.

 

[Shin]

2 minutes ago, I_Like_Thing said:

I want to share a fail-safe pickup technique Leo showed me the last time I visited him in Vegas. He drove me well out of the city, which made me nervous because I thought there might be a hole just my size pre-dug out in the dessert someplace, but my fears subsided when he drove into the parking lot of what looked like some dive bar in the middle of nowhere. I followed Leo inside; he had the swaggar and stride of someone who had tread this ground many times.

Girls recognized Leo, and smiled when greeting him. They looked me up and down, and finally lined up and Leo told me to pick one. I had a difficult time choosing, but I picked the one girl who seemed like she might like me. After this, and here is the pickup technique I want to share, Leo said, "I got this covered, bro," and he pulled out his credit card. 

<----- Literally my face when I read the last 6 words.

 

[Toby]

@Falk That sounds like the "best of" of pickup community platitudes.
----
Other than that, there is nothing weird about asking a girl where you went wrong if you have Asperger / Autism. That is something which is an expression of the condition. (I guess someone mentioned that @electroBeam has this condition).