Obsession

[Gladius]

Hello guys!

I don't think this topic has been treated in any of Leo's videos. 

The thing is I'm overly obsessed with a girl for more than one year. We were office colleagues and I noticed she expressed some mild interest in me. I didn't feel really confident by then. I tried to get to know her going out in a non-romantic way, but it never escalated to anything else. Then she moved to another country but added me on the f***ing facebook, so I had excited again and didn't get over it.

Since then we have just been texting, she replies and occasionally she starts the conversation, but I can't see a lot of effort from her side. I don't think I'm being creepy yet though.

I'm doing my daily 20 minute meditation but still think about her every single day, no matter if I'm dating other people or doing anything else. Any recommendations? 

Thanks!

[Bodhi123]

Obsession is never a good thing. Let it go.

[ajasatya]

@Gladius let it go. it's a fantasy.

get healthy. presence is fundamental. be present in your own life first.

[Emerald]

On 2/14/2017 at 7:22 PM, Gladius said:

Hello guys!

I don't think this topic has been treated in any of Leo's videos. 

The thing is I'm overly obsessed with a girl for more than one year. We were office colleagues and I noticed she expressed some mild interest in me. I didn't feel really confident by then. I tried to get to know her going out in a non-romantic way, but it never escalated to anything else. Then she moved to another country but added me on the f***ing facebook, so I had excited again and didn't get over it.

Since then we have just been texting, she replies and occasionally she starts the conversation, but I can't see a lot of effort from her side. I don't think I'm being creepy yet though.

I'm doing my daily 20 minute meditation but still think about her every single day, no matter if I'm dating other people or doing anything else. Any recommendations? 

Thanks!

I've had two intense romantic obsessions in my life, and both had deeper causes than I was aware of while in the midst of them. I share my personal insights on obsession in this video. I hope that it is helpful.

[Gladius]

@Emerald Wilkins thank you very much, it was really helpful. The problem is that now I'm obsessed with you (just kidding!).

Actually a few months ago, when I definetely lost her I finally took action to change my life. The obsession was still there though, but I'm beginning to understand now the real causes of it. 

[Emerald]

On 2/16/2017 at 4:08 AM, Gladius said:

@Emerald Wilkins thank you very much, it was really helpful. The problem is that now I'm obsessed with you (just kidding!).

Actually a few months ago, when I definetely lost her I finally took action to change my life. The obsession was still there though, but I'm beginning to understand now the real causes of it. 

Haha  I'm glad the video was helpful. It can be difficult to spot the underlying causes. But I can clearly see now, in retrospect, how my life circumstances were setting me up for obsessions to occur. 

[jse]

@Gladius the infatuation stage of romantic love normally occurs in the early months of a healthy love relationship (falling in love), and plays an important biological role:  attraction -> procreation -> genetic immortality.  The problem happens when the process is interrupted through separation, such as in your case.  I've been at both ends of obsession, and I feel for your suffering.

Lookit that, they've even named a cologne after our suffering:

Edited February 21, 2017 by jse
edit: words failed me

[Nahm]

Even Pam Anderson is some dudes occasionally bitchy wife. 

You love the fantasy, not the woman.

Grow.