Need quick advice: "dating" at work?

[Tyler Robinson]

Mixed signals are like burgers from Macdonalds. They are cheap but give you stomach problems later. 

Relationships that started with mixed signals almost never end well. They are fantasies of immature minds. 

And always avoid men women who give mixed signals. They are generally players. 

 

[King Merk]

3 hours ago, Uncover said:

And face to face I have no place to meet new girls. Since I come from work then I go in my 3 square feet room and spend the rest of the evening alone there, like, day by day. It's a small city, with very little to do. I went to a gym 3 months ago, I got an accident and I stopped going. However, after gym I would still come back my empty cave. So the gym was just a little "refresh". 

You’re throwing a Hail Mary to a coworker who’s obviously not interested in you (because your game sucks)

You need more experience with women. Stop trying to squirm around that. 

What’s the population of this small city? I call bullshit that there is no place to meet new women.

I used to live in a small town of 3,000 people and had multiple sexual partners there. Your excuses are invalid.

And I get it, it certainly is harder to game in a smaller city but that doesn’t make it impossible. Besides, if it is truly important to you then you can always move to a more populated area. (Which might be necessary if you fuck things up with this work gal) 

I make these comments because I don’t want your next 2 years to look like your last two years… you sitting alone in your room masturbating to porn.

Yea fuck that.

You’re capable of making big changes in your life. Best of luck bro. 

 

 

[Tudo]

14 minutes ago, Tyler Robinson said:

Mixed signals are like burgers from Macdonalds. They are cheap but give you stomach problems later. 

Relationships that started with mixed signals almost never end well. They are fantasies of immature minds. 

And always avoid men women who give mixed signals. They are generally players. 

 

Yes, exactly. Follow these advises, buddy.

[Jannes]

You need to get out of your introvert mindset and socialize more. Preferably in groups with lots of women. You also might want to look into microdosing. It definetly helps me and others with social anxiety. 

[Devin]

3 hours ago, Uncover said:

Well, I felt the fear and did it anyway. It felt great, and it went quite well, but we only talked about work. Today was the second time we talked at work (half an hour face 2 face), I was less anxious.

However, I don't see it going somewhere. We don't talk by texting, she ignores my texts if I write her. We only talk face 2 face over lunch break and I don't understand why. I get the impression that she doesn't want anything with me, but I also see her interested somehow; I can't understand her. Idk what to do.

After lunch break I texted her on the work chat (hangouts) if she wants to go out after work. She simply replied "I can't today". I said: "how about sunday evening? Or whenever you are free" (alongside 3 more sentences which she saw and ignored, I deleted them all). Tomorrow I'll ask her again if we can talk over lunch break. Most likely she will say yes.

Even though, I don't like talking over lunch break because we don't have privacy and we can't talk personal things. Like today.. after 10 mins alone another colleague came and joined our table, It seemed that this new colleague was the center if attention now, the conversation revolved around her mostly somehow. So yes, we kinda lost contact at that point, I felt her like wanting to leave. Well, I'll see tomorrow, but I'm not very optimistic.    

Don't try to understand her signals too much, if you like her, talk to her, if nothing else it will give you experience with women. She may want to be friends first, she may be an introvert. If you want to talk to her do it, when you no longer want to then quit

Edited September 15, 2022 by Devin

[Thought Art]

Lol, well whatever you do you'll learn.

[NoSelfSelf]

@Devin Why not rob a bank to get rid of fear of not having money ? 

[Devin]

@NoSelfSelf that's destructive, she's invited him to spend lunch together multiple times, yeah she doesn't wanna message, I hate messaging too, they see each other everyday why use messenger? I didn't say rape her or harass her, that goes without saying

You moderators are trolls

Edited September 16, 2022 by Devin

[NoSelfSelf]

@Devin im trying to speak in a way that makes you think but its flying over your head ✈

[Chives99]

if shes blowing hot and cold I wouldn't bother, shes blowing hot and cold and using you as a maybe option if things dont work out with another guy. Another thing I will add is stop searching for  a girlfriend just be casual get to know them have fun and ask them out later, you dont want to be on a date and not click

[Devin]

1 hour ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Devin im trying to speak in a way that makes you think but its flying over your head ✈

I don't think he's harassing her, it sounds like he's going to stop messaging so I don't think he's completely socially uncalibrated, I think he'll stop if it gets to harassment

Edited September 16, 2022 by Devin

[NoSelfSelf]

@Devin You dont listen ever, im not saying he's harrasing her my point flys over your head, that's the thing and you dont think about new perspectives you are in self confirming bias then you attack when its not going your way getting all emotional.

You are defending that weak position he put himself in shows me how much game you have so before attacking someone check yourself...

[Devin]

6 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Devin You dont listen ever, im not saying he's harrasing her my point flys over your head, that's the thing and you dont think about new perspectives you are in self confirming bias then you attack when its not going your way getting all emotional.

You are defending that weak position he put himself in shows me how much game you have so before attacking someone check yourself...

Definitely flys over my head, I have absolutely no idea what your point was.

My answer to your question is; because it's destructive and wouldn't get you over the fear of not having money

Are you saying he should be okay with not having a woman before pursuing? Well I think he's decided otherwise so far and i don't believe in trying to turn people around on their path, he asked "how" not "should i"

Edited September 17, 2022 by Devin

[NoSelfSelf]

@Devin  answer should be:the way hes going about getting money is not good for him...somebody has alot of money how did he get it someone gets laid often how is he getting it...

So if someone decided to rob a bank you would tell him how and not tell him the risks first?

I mean do whatever you want go buy her a house to be with you if how is not important...

Nobody should listen to me btw do you! But im just sharing my best insights...

Edited September 17, 2022 by NoSelfSelf

[integral]

On 9/15/2022 at 2:07 PM, Uncover said:

After lunch break I texted her on the work chat (hangouts) if she wants to go out after work. She simply replied "I can't today". I said: "how about sunday evening? Or whenever you are free" (alongside 3 more sentences which she saw and ignored, I deleted them all). Tomorrow I'll ask her again if we can talk over lunch break. Most likely she will say yes.

Even though, I don't like talking over lunch break because we don't have privacy and we can't talk personal things. Like today.. after 10 mins alone another colleague came and joined our table, It seemed that this new colleague was the center if attention now, the conversation revolved around her mostly somehow. So yes, we kinda lost contact at that point, I felt her like wanting to leave. Well, I'll see tomorrow, but I'm not very optimistic.  

This is what is happening, you want her and because of that your unable to behave properly and make intelligence decisions. Its the most common trap, its an altered personality change that happens when you want a girl. 

If you had any other mind set you might have a chance. Talk to her like she is a guy friend and things will go better then this. 

Edited September 17, 2022 by integral

[Devin]

2 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Devin  answer should be:the way hes going about getting money is not good for him...somebody has alot of money how did he get it someone gets laid often how is he getting it...

So if someone decided to rob a bank you would tell him how and not tell him the risks first?

I mean do whatever you want go buy her a house to be with you if how is not important...

Nobody should listen to me btw do you! But im just sharing my best insights...

I wouldn't tell him how, I'd call the police, it's destructive. But I think you mean he may get hurt or in trouble, I don't think he will

[NoSelfSelf]

@Devin You are too logical and literal ?

[Arcangelo]

Don't go looking for meat where you make your bread.

However if she is in an another department, it might be OK to pursue. I try not even looking or talking to my hot colleagues. Some times my testosterone betrays me and I tell them something.

Idk where do women get the idea that if a man talks to them he wants sex...

[Tron]

On 9/16/2022 at 6:10 PM, Chives99 said:

if shes blowing hot and cold I wouldn't bother, shes blowing hot and cold and using you as a maybe option if things dont work out with another guy. Another thing I will add is stop searching for  a girlfriend just be casual get to know them have fun and ask them out later, you dont want to be on a date and not click

so casually get to know them how? by asking them out on a date or something??

[Devin]

@Tron talk to them at lunch once in a while