Leo's video on socializing

[trenton]

Firstly, I would like to compare Leo's video to my experience. I have seen many times throughout my life that socializing has lead me to mimicking people's behavior in unoriginal ways. I will make a few.

Laughing about sex as a kid. This was a way to score cheap laughs and make other kids want to be my friends. In fact I deliberately planned jokes in advance to make a good first impression when I was in school. My best joke was the admission that I am not really funny person with original jokes. I was just memorizing jokes I heard before so you would think I'm funny and want to be my friend. This was my Most original joke and my Most hilarious joke. This lead to more authentic friendships after a few weeks.

Another one is how I pretended not to like girly music because I didn't want people to think I'm gay. Actually I like Justin Bieber. Noticing conformity is all about being more authentic. I see a lot of conformity starting when we are children especially in gender roles. The battle of the sexes starts with cooties.

As I got into middle school I became more skeptical of conformity. First of all my parents were a terrible example because they were drug addicts and dad fled the state to avoid paying child support. I decided that I needed to think for myself and decide what was right and wrong or good and bad. My parents were not an option for understanding life and reality unless I wanted to become a drug dealer. This lead me to becoming more conscious of self deception. Even so I still made all kinds of mistakes with ideas like suffering is wrong. These misguided ideas have lead me to the constant struggle for self understanding which continues to this day.

Today I look conformity in spiritual communities. I know that a question people are encouraged to ask is "who am I?" I am skeptical of these practices because people are following all the same questions in self inquiry. Therefore, they would reach similar conclusions. I think it is better to ask questions which we are most interested in and then expand from there, otherwise you will just be copying some other spiritual teacher. A question more interesting to me is "why do I want to understand myself?" Why am I so interesting to me? What do I feel I am missing by not understanding myself? I am observing my thoughts and emotions constantly because I am seeking self understanding. Why is self understanding so important? Maybe if I frame my questioning this way I will make better progress than if I copy the inquiry of others. Sometimes sitting there asking "who am I" doesn't do anything.

 secondly, I liked Leo's interesting decision to skip criticizing religious fundamentalism. I am not very vocal about my criticisms, but I see them happening in my thoughts when I see how foolish this behavior is. To me something feels off about criticizing religious fundamentalism. I have a few ideas why. Maybe although my criticisms are correct, it is not the direction I want to take in my life. It makes me feel heated on the inside and maybe many of these people will never change anyway. I have checked myself several times for hypocrisy surrounding religious fundamentalism to make sure I'm not projecting. Another interesting question is why does it feel dirty and off somehow to be criticizing people like these?

Maybe my energy is better spent elsewhere just like in fruitless political arguments that change nothing. In my case I am actually careful to avoid heated arguments with my family and I instead share my relevant research in a non judgemental way. This actually stops a lot of arguments and clears up misconceptions while bringing my family closer together. I have done all but get my grandma to admit that Biden won because she is close minded to any evidence I show her that Trump did something wrong. She has admitted many of her biases and false beliefs though as my research chips away at her angry rants.

I have taken action. I picked up more journals because I ran out of space in my other journals for contemplation. I also typed my questions into YouTube and I was stunned by the results. One question I am interested in is "what is a good education?" I have a lot of radical ideas about what education could look like. It should teach children how indoctrination works and the history of white washing history to legitimize pre existing power structures. The goal should be open mindedness, creativity, original thinking, critical thinking, and more.

The YouTube channel I stumbled into by doing this search talks about raising our consciousness, ego development, ego death, non duality, and how psychedelics can change your life. It talked about all the same things I heard from actualized.org.

https://m.youtube.com/c/EvolvedTeachings

I think asking the questions we are most interested in and pursuing them is the key to personal and spiritual growth. I think this might be the best way for me to live my life and discover the beauty of reality. Conformity provides us with a false sense of comfort because it keeps us on the trodden path with an incomplete understanding of life. This curiosity and our desire to know is what pushes us outside of the box. When people lack the desire to know, they fall into conformity and they hand wave these things away as mere philosophy. 

Sometimes my sister gets annoyed with me because I am too abstract. Seeking truth and becoming abstract can make it hard to socialize if most people lack the desire to know. I get bored of small talk fast so I ask a lot of questions and my family gets annoyed by all of these questions. Sometimes strangers have a lot of fun with me by asking a lot of questions and wondering about reality as we become curious. We talk about how the definition of insanity changes over time and how only an insane person would never question their sanity.

Good video

[Leo Gura]

Good work.

23 minutes ago, trenton said:

Another interesting question is why does it feel dirty and off somehow to be criticizing people like these?

One day you will realize that all criticism of reality is delusion.

See my video: All Criticism Is Untennable

 

[Matthew85]

16 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

One day you will realize that all criticism of reality is delusion.

It's interesting to read this from you considering many of your blog posts and video's. I guess it's part of your integration process. 

[Leo Gura]

7 minutes ago, Matthew85 said:

It's interesting to read this from you considering many of your blog posts and video's. I guess it's part of your integration process. 

All criticism is a relative matter.

At the Absolute level, reality is Perfect. At the human level, criticism has a survival function. Criticism can be used to make relative improvements to things.

For example, critizing Trump can help prevent him from getting re-elected and screwing up the government with his narcissism. When I criticize a thing, it's usually for a pragmatic outcome, like slapping a kid who is about to stick his hand on a hot stove.

Edited September 13, 2022 by Leo Gura

[gettoefl]

don't criticize them pity them for how hopelessly deluded they are that not one word you could utter could penetrate them

the word compassion means to suffer with ...why not  try to sit down and break bread with such people

[trenton]

8 hours ago, gettoefl said:

don't criticize them pity them for how hopelessly deluded they are that not one word you could utter could penetrate them

the word compassion means to suffer with ...why not  try to sit down and break bread with such people

@gettoefl in my heart I do feel that way. I see the profound tragedy taking place and my mind is trying to find way to stop this horribly depressing thing from happening. Maybe most people don't value independent thinking and they are happy without this freedom. It is painfully sad and no matter how long the list of criticisms it will not make this sad reality go away. I'm grateful for my freedom and my heart goes out to the less fortunate.

This is what lies beneath my apparent dislike. I wish nothing but the best for them. Of course I never hold these things against individuals. They were indoctrinated And they do what they were taught. It is a collective issue and no individual is to blame.

"Forgive them father for they know not what they do." This describes religious fundamentalism perfectly. The criticisms my mind comes up with prevents me from fully surrendering to the sad reality that not everybody can be helped. 

By the way I have met these people in a nearby church. They were giving out soup to the poor. Clearly they mean well and they are doing their best to be good. I understand that everybody is good no matter these tragic limits.

[gettoefl]

15 hours ago, trenton said:

@gettoefl in my heart I do feel that way. I see the profound tragedy taking place and my mind is trying to find way to stop this horribly depressing thing from happening. Maybe most people don't value independent thinking and they are happy without this freedom. It is painfully sad and no matter how long the list of criticisms it will not make this sad reality go away. I'm grateful for my freedom and my heart goes out to the less fortunate.

This is what lies beneath my apparent dislike. I wish nothing but the best for them. Of course I never hold these things against individuals. They were indoctrinated And they do what they were taught. It is a collective issue and no individual is to blame.

"Forgive them father for they know not what they do." This describes religious fundamentalism perfectly. The criticisms my mind comes up with prevents me from fully surrendering to the sad reality that not everybody can be helped. 

By the way I have met these people in a nearby church. They were giving out soup to the poor. Clearly they mean well and they are doing their best to be good. I understand that everybody is good no matter these tragic limits.

there but for the grace of god go i

the latest video makes clear the key is to focus on yourself, this is your dream your time your rules

others are incidental and merely vehicles to enjoy more fully