How to give a girl masculine containment?

[Jacob Morres]

Apparently girls really like this, but I don't know what it is tbh? Or how to actualize this 

Recently I learned how to "see, and hear" people and I thought maybe I can learn this masculine containment thing next 

[Tyler Robinson]

Make her feel accepted. Be chivalrous. 

[Jacob Morres]

@Tyler Robinson 

 

Curious about what you mean by saying, making her feel accepted 

[Tyler Robinson]

27 minutes ago, Jacob Morres said:

@Tyler Robinson 

 

Curious about what you mean by saying, making her feel accepted 

An abundant man does not restrict a woman. He let's her play around like a child. He let's her use his body and mind like a playground. He might act tough by being assertive. Notice the difference between aggressive and assertive. Girls feel mortified by aggressive guys and girls feel proud of assertive men. 

Difference between aggressive and assertive 

 

Assertive 

Girl - Opinion A

Guy - Opinion B. I stand by my opinion. These are my values. I respect yours. 

 

Aggressive 

Girl - Opinion A

Guy - Opinion B. I don't agree with you. You're being stupid. You need to listen to me. You are wrong. I want you to follow my words. 

The second example is showing lack of containment. No space for her ideas or thoughts or identity. Basically the guy is trying to push his frame onto her without any consideration for her frame of mind. 

The first guy exhibits containment by showing respect for feminine thought/feeling. He accepts her for who she is meanwhile still preserving his Masculinity. He is not bowing to her yet he doesn't behave belligerent. 

The second guy is being dominant in an unhealthy toxic pushy way with zero containment. 

When women smell lack of containment and excessive Domination on the guy coupled with constant aggression, they lose all attraction for the guy. 

Relationships are intimate. You cannot relegate the other person to something stuck to the bottom of your shoe. That doesn't work. 

Most women feel off and smothered by men who lack containment. 

 

Relationship with a woman is about raising your value in her eyes as a man. If you fail to do that and exhibit your insecurity then she loses all interest in no time 

 

You have to be a man of abundance. This does not mean more women, what it means is the ability to express openness and flexibility to a woman, generosity rather than insecurity and fear. 

You have to make the woman feel that whatever she does has zero impact on you as a man. And not feel triggered by her actions or words.

 

Edited September 9, 2022 by Tyler Robinson

[eos_nyxia]

Wasn't this term from a Teal Swan video originally?

I found a transcript of her video here, and there is a bullet point list which might be worth looking at:

https://tealswan.com/resources/articles/masculine-containment-r443/

 

...I have to ask though, is it really actually that emotionally healthy for adult men to only be doing the containing, even if this is what works for a lot of women? Don't they have to get it from elsewhere somehow?

Isn't this horribly one-sided and a recipe for being emotionally retentive and dysfunctional? Like... are a lot of these points just human needs?

Because like the article says, traditionally, men are 'supposed' to not just hold it for their women, but other women. And probably on top of that, their children, and their community.

I can't help but wonder if this is a very common factor in men when they seek something emotional (as in, NOT just sexual) outside of their primary romantic relationship.

Edited September 9, 2022 by eos_nyxia

[eos_nyxia]

That said, I actually agree with a lot of what's on that list.

Valuing a lot of these things was especially important to me because I got jack shit from my family in terms of emotional protectiveness (and even physical protectiveness in some ways), openness, warmth, care and attention, understanding, etc.