Did You Pick Your Roles?

[eskwire]

Re: Dropping Your Roles. Were you able to see your own? I wasn't. I may have to ask someone close to me. I don't know how I'm bullshitting. 

[Nahm]

35 minutes ago, eskwire said:

Re: Dropping Your Roles. Were you able to see your own? I wasn't. I may have to ask someone close to me. I don't know how I'm bullshitting. 

It's entirely possible that you aren't bullshitting. Perhaps you don't think in terms of roles to begin with. You probably think about the action someone does and you don't characterize them as that action. Like someone helped someone or hurt someone, vs, that person is a bad or good person.

[eskwire]

@Nahm I considered that, but thought I may just be blind to it. People frequently tell me I'm weird, which means there is authenticity there. Thanks!

[Guest Annetta]

Yeah.

I got: diseased person, spirituality, victim, good girl, and starving artist

I don't understand though, like... ok... I see these roles but... now what?  They're automatic.  

[Nahm]

2 minutes ago, Whywolf said:

Yeah.

I got: diseased person, spirituality, victim, good girl, and starving artist

I don't understand though, like... ok... I see these roles but... now what?  They're automatic.  

Now, let them go. It's an exercise in realizing you think of yourself as those things or those "roles". Realizing and letting them go helps you liberate, so you can know that you already are anything you want, because you are free.

[Leo Gura]

@Whywolf Can you see what's underneath them?

[Principium Nexus]

But would pursuing a role you like be considered wrong? As long as they don't obstruct you then what would be bad about it?

[Guest Annetta]

@Leo Gura Not really.

[Leo Gura]

@Whywolf Try using your imagination, for starters. Imagination is a powerful tool.

[eskwire]

19 minutes ago, Captain Flint said:

Now. Imagine your mom sees you talking to your chief. Would she see some "different version of you" or "the same you" she always known?

Ah there you go, that's another way to frame it.

[ItsMeIA]

56 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@Whywolf Can you see what's underneath them?

Probably the authentic self

After looking at some roles i played in my life i realized that the way these fucked me up is that i justified actions which didn't serve the authentic me but the ego (which of course made tons of problems down the road). 

[xudbux]

The lone wolf role really resonated with me and gave me that "oh shit, this is me" moment. I realized that I acquired this role sometime during the beginning of middle school where I felt that I didn't fit into any specific group or clique, so I started to associate myself as a loner. I also see that it plays into my introversion and the need to work and spend time alone.

[eskwire]

1 hour ago, Whywolf said:

Yeah.

I got: diseased person, spirituality, victim, good girl, and starving artist

I don't understand though, like... ok... I see these roles but... now what?  They're automatic.  

Did you do the worksheet? 

[Truth]

@Leo Gura Can you rephrase this question --> "How does each role feed into your sense of being a self?" don't really understand what you mean.

[eskwire]

@Whywolf Maybe think about it this way. Your roles are the popsicle sticks of your identity. They make a little bird house that is "you," but it is a construction. All structures get damaged or fall out of use at times...when the birds fly away in winter, the bird house is not necessary.  

Clinging to and protecting this identity structure that is "you" causes suffering. It is automatic to acquire and sustain these roles while unaware; however, the exercise is shining awareness on the phenomenon so that you won't continue automatically participating in a suffering-inducing activity. 

[Nahm]

1 hour ago, Whywolf said:

Yeah.

I got: diseased person, spirituality, victim, good girl, and starving artist

I don't understand though, like... ok... I see these roles but... now what?  They're automatic.  

Imagine you're watching a movie, and a man is at home with his wife and kids, cracking dad jokes, telling them to have a good day. Then he goes to his job at where the fuck ever and tells his boss he's going to get that big client account closed today. Then on the way home someone cut's him off and so he gives them the finger. Then he gets home and tells his wife it was a long day, and she gives him a hug, etc.

Then later, that night, that guy sits straight up in bed out of a deep sleep and realizes he's an actor, in a movie.

Upon realizing this, he is free. 

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, Truth said:

@Leo Gura Can you rephrase this question --> "How does each role feed into your sense of being a self?" don't really understand what you mean.

Yeah... that's sort of an advanced question. You're not going to understand it well unless you've done a lot of self-inquiry or actually experienced reality without a self.

[Truth]

37 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Yeah... that's sort of an advanced question. You're not going to understand it well unless you've done a lot of self-inquiry or actually experienced reality without a self.

yeah that makes sense, thinking about it more that sounds like a good question to re-frame roles from the root that is identity. hook it up wit suma dat 5-MeO :D? 

[Leo Gura]

@Truth 1g of mushrooms is enough to show you all your roles.

[Guest Annetta]

@Nahm I've had two experiences with that, but the realization didn't stick, as I have an addiction to over conceptualizing things, so the ego came back with trying to understand what the experience was telling me.  Which I know deep down what it is telling me, but the reality is I don't feel comfortable 'feeling' anything in my body - because it isn't working right.

It makes me nervous and I'm avoiding dealing with the fact that things are happening outside of my control by attaching to my stream of thoughts.

Normally I could control this, but anxiety is making it very difficult.  Reality isn't ever going to be pleasant.  But thoughts can be.  There's not a lot of contentment in the here and now.

@eskwire Not yet, brain fog all day - when it clears up I'll need to complete it.

@Leo Gura Yeah, maybe like a fluidity with whatever happens - being ok with it, without a label.
Have you ever been plagued by repetitive thoughts, that just will not stop?
How long did meditation work for you to help clear them?

"Am I human or am I dancer?"