How to compliment women in a way that makes her feel good?

[Vercingetorix]

Yesterday at my job There was a girl (that looked 15ish) with her mom and she was really beautiful! I couldn't help but admire her looks. during the interaction with her and her mom I found out she was even younger - not even 13.  On the one hand I want to express myself freely and Not to feel that I have to repress my admiration of her looks. On the other hand It feels  weird to tell a 13 years girl that I find her beautiful. 

I know That the important thing is my intention - If the compliment comes from an honest and sincere place , with a fun vibe and smile and not from neediness It will tend to work but still I find it weird to be said to a young girl.

That's open up a bigger question for me - Is there a general Formula for complimenting? I see that it's better to talk about myself: when I look at you I feel inspired, I find you cute/beautiful rather than "you are beautiful" or "you have beautiful eyes". 

Your thoughts?

 

[Pavement]

It’s not complimenting a woman, it’s about a little girl. I would suggest you don’t try and compliment a female child on their good looks. 

[Yarco]

It's not worth the risk. Even if you are sincere with no bad intentions, the vast majority of people who would compliment a 12 - 15 year old in front of their mother are unhinged, and you're going to get lumped into that group by default. When it comes to survival and wellbeing of your offspring, you don't mess around and take chances.

A few scenarios where you could maybe get away with it:

• If you're clearly a dad with your own similar-aged daughter beside you
• A really flamboyant gay guy
• A guy clearly so attractive and successful that there's no threat of him being attracted to a 12 year old. Basically, a gigachad. Ideally with an attractive woman beside him for additional cover because even being a gigachad might not be enough.

Even a super sweet elderly old man, it's about 50/50 and could go either way.

When you DO compliment a woman (ideally 18+), try to focus it around stuff that she chose, rather than stuff outside of her control. She didn't pick her eyes or do any work to earn or develop them. Focus on complimenting a hairstyle, outfit, or ideally something smaller like a bracelet or shoes that really stand out.

The only time I've sincerely complimented a woman in public (outside of situations with an ulterior motive like pickup) was this woman I saw with super vibrant rainbow-colored hair. I've never seen anything like it before or since, and it was so awesome that I felt compelled to go up and say something just to make her day and encourage her. And when you're sincere about it, the amazement and appreciation will come off in your vocal tonality, in a way there's no way to fake or hide another intent behind. It's pure.

[Raze]

Compliment something that she has done, like her fashion sense. And walk away right after you compliment so she knows you were just giving a compliment and don’t want anything from her.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMChZC2fopI&t=23m0s

Edited August 25, 2022 by Raze

[petar8p]

You're 35 man, don't do it, it's weird as shit. 

 

Practice expressing yourself freely with women your age or more towards the legal side haha. 

 

Love

 

[Leo Gura]

15 hours ago, Vercingetorix said:

I found out she was even younger - not even 13.  On the one hand I want to express myself freely and Not to feel that I have to repress my admiration of her looks. On the other hand It feels  weird to tell a 13 years girl that I find her beautiful. 

Yes, that is the definition of creepy.

Don't flirt with 13 year olds, for fuck's sake.

[Devin]

He didn't say he was flirting with her!!!! Or that he was attracted to her!!!! You people are projecting

She was pretty, girls love being called pretty, so long as you're not creepy about it. If you're attracted to her, get help.

Edited August 26, 2022 by Devin

[RendHeaven]

53 minutes ago, Aleister Crowleyy said:

The highschool girls are the worst. They stand right next to me, follow me in groups, whisper how hot I am. Or if I walk behind them they will bend over to "grab an item" exactly when I am behind them. It's insanity. I usually try to avoid them at all costs after that happened more than once. I feel watched. 

boohoo woe is me LOL

[hoodrow trillson]

[Roy]

The key to complimenting women successfully is these two things;

- Pointing out really subtle or seemingly insignificant things, that show you're being thoughtful and observant of them.

- Doing it spontaneously, or during an off-time when she wouldn't normally expect a compliment. It will spike her emotional state.

[Vercingetorix]

Guys, Thanks for all the Funny replies, it made my day  
Will answer later.
 

[Ulax]

I get you have a certain desire to do that.

However, living in civil society requires resisting our desires when it would be inappropriate to fulfil them. I think this would be one such instance.

I don't think you should compliment random girls on their attractiveness if they seem below the relevant age of consent.

Edited August 26, 2022 by Ulax

[Vercingetorix]

@Judy2 Thanks. 
I work at a thinking puzzle shop and I give people puzzles to solve so I thought a good line cold be "Wow you really pretty, let's find out if you're smart as well and give her a puzzle to try )

@Pavement why not?

@KH2  Children are people too, why ignore them? I'm not talking about pick up, just common curtesy and having an enjoyable time with people.

@Yarco Where I live I don't feel there is problem complimenting a girl (in a non needy/creepy way...). I feel more creepy If I have to hide my thoughts.
Thanks for the reminder that Non look related compliments are great.

@RazeI actually do it sometimes, that's cool
In the situation I'm talking about it's people who I interact with for some time .

@petar8p I agree that it's weird in a way. But it's also weird to hide something positive you have to say to someone. Also, maybe it helps me that no one believes me when I tell them my age, People think I'm 25.
And I do practice with older women, Thanks

[Vercingetorix]

@Leo Gura Like Devin said, It's not about flirting

 @Devin Thanks 

@hoodrow trillson  best response. Thankfully I don't live In America. 

@Ulax  I don't think admiring someone beauty equals wanting to sleep with them. Although It's interesting to see what the parents think about it. I think I will try complimenting in the best way I can find and see if the  girl / Parents responses are positive or not. If I see negative responses I will keep my thoughts to myself.

[Ulax]

@Vercingetorix Okay dude. I think this is going to create an uncomfortable situation for all parties involved if you do it. I think this is a pretty unsocially calibrated thing to be intending to do.

[Max_V]

Though supposing it comes from good intentions, I don't think complimenting her is worth it. Why? because it will be misunderstood and cause discomfort 9 times out 10. Better to just keep it to yourself and if you do want to practice complimenting people, find situations that are less open to misinterpretation.

[Tyler Robinson]

You can't admire someone who is 13 years old. 

You're low on EQ and social awareness. 

Try understanding that this is socially not okay even if you logic your way through it. 

You're looking at it very dryly. In a socially awkward illogical way. 

She won't be able to respond to your compliment because she won't get it. 

Worst case scenario is if she develops an infatuation for you, is what happened to me when I was 13 and got infatuated with a 24 year old guy always staring at me, he was my neighbor.  

That wasn't healthy in hindsight but I had zero clue about sexuality at 13.

Let children be children. 

Whats the point of even complimenting when it's not in a flirty context anyway? I mean what boost are you getting out of it? 

Why even get into situations that are toxic where you have nothing to gain? 

I don't think that you're doing this with bad intent. But you're acting socially uncalibrated and pushing the envelop to see if it's okay just for the heck of it. 

Which is kinda okay as long as you don't anything harmful but even then it can come off as super weird. 

Imagine if you shared this with your friends if your age and they will give you super weird wtf looks. Would it be worthy risking your reputation for something petty and silly like that? 

This is not a matured act. Try to grow emotional and psychological maturity. 

In other words, grow up. Stop acting childish. 

 

 

[petar8p]

If you really wanna do it, perhaps the best thing would be to casually mention it to her mother, but it also might get creepy and it's best to keep yourself out of this. 

 

Freedom doesn't necessarily mean to do whatever you want, whenever you want, but to feel free to express yourself within the confines and rules of this world.

 

A girl probably wouldn't know how to respond to that compliment, especially coming from an adult man, in front of her mother.

[Leo Gura]

7 hours ago, Vercingetorix said:

Like Devin said, It's not about flirting

If you are telling a girl she's beautiful, you are flirting with her!

For fuck's sake.

[Leo Gura]

4 hours ago, BenG said:

@Vercingetorix

Tell her that you have candy to give her, but that she needs to follow you outside to your windowless van.

I've actually said this girls in a dark parking garage. She was over 21 though.

Lol