Is marriage a scam?

[axiom]

13 hours ago, Roy said:

I'm pretty sure there are rules and protections for non married couples that are similar to marriage anyways. They are called "Common Law".

In the UK this does not apply. Not sure about the US.

I think that those of you suggesting all household income should be split equally should ask yourselves why. 

There are many situations in which a partner is unwilling to work, and unwilling to contribute very much in other ways. They think that their contribution is simply to exist. 

The providing partner will often stay in a situation like this for years even though it makes them miserable, because they hope that with enough encouragement (and eventually desperation) the parasite will realise that without sharing the workload, the host is going to die.

Years roll by, and eventually the host is so energetically depleted and so miserable that they decide the only way they will survive is to divorce. 

… and then they have to divide everything 50/50.

This makes marriage a little bit pointless in my opinion. The alternative is fairer to both parties - as they can only take away what they brought in.

Over the coming years people are going to be suffering significant hardship. There may be war, but there will certainly be severe recession and relationships are going to be tested. The prospect of marriage will become increasingly risky for a person who has worked hard to build up resources, as losing 50% could quite literally mean the difference between life and death.

Inflation in the UK is predicted now to reach over 18% next year. The hyperinflationary curve is only just beginning. People will be much more risk averse over the next decade.

[Leo Gura]

JP actually has a pretty good take on marriage: it's a commitment. The commitment is the most important part. It's like tying yourself to a sinking ship. You don't do it for the fun. You only do it if you're a serious sailor. If you treat it like that, it's not a scam, it's a test of your resolve and it matures you.

[something_else]

14 hours ago, Devin said:

True, I was sloppy, most people on here won't likely take it as black and white but some will, thank you.

 

ifstudies.org

Does Marriage Really Make Us Healthier and Happier?

Nov 6, 2019 — The cautious answer to this question is, yes: married people do appear to be happier than people who are not married, including people who are ...

https://www.apa.org › married-happy

Are married people happier than unmarried people?

WASHINGTON - In a large longitudinal study that sheds new light on the association between marital status and happiness, researchers have found that people ...

https://www.psychologytoday.com › ...

Does Marriage Actually Make People Happier? - Psychology Today

Dec 17, 2021 — Married people are generally happier than singles, but psychologists debate whether marriage causes or selects for happiness.

https://www.marketwatch.com › story

Married couples are happier than everyone else, especially in middle age

May 23, 2019 — Married couples are happier than everyone else, whether they're single, divorced, widowed or separated, according to a new study published ...

https://www.aei.org › articles › does...

Does Getting Married Really Make You Happier? - American Enterprise Institute

Feb 7, 2022 — Getting married significantly increases happiness within a 2-year time frame, and while the effects at the 4-year window are somewhat diminished

Fair enough, well played  Although, most of those do talk about their pretty heavy limitations. The biggest one is that this is so difficult to measure because it could easily just be that happiness causes people to get married rather than marriage causing happiness. Or as one of those studies put it:

Quote

but psychologists debate whether marriage causes or selects for happiness

And it is also really difficult to measure happiness in the first place which is another issue. Especially over a long period of time.

[Devin]

1 hour ago, something_else said:

Fair enough, well played  Although, most of those do talk about their pretty heavy limitations. The biggest one is that this is so difficult to measure because it could easily just be that happiness causes people to get married rather than marriage causing happiness. Or as one of those studies put it:

And it is also really difficult to measure happiness in the first place which is another issue. Especially over a long period of time.

Yeah, I don't think marriage makes unhappy people happy, I think it's a next level sort of thing. My emphasis in the post that started our conversation is meant to be spending your life going as deep as you can with one person rather than multiple shallower relationships. It's just my view, marriage isn't for everyone.