How to let go of CRINGE from past self?

[Panteranegra]

Sometimes, I get cringe about my past ego experiences, masks and self deceptions. I guess is part of growing. Is it a normal human experience or is just me?

How to transcend Cringe?

 

Edited August 13, 2022 by Panteranegra

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbb_0qNdjjo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NK-rIVi4nLI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsyP80BydV4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVqANXVTLN4

http://happinessbeyondthought.blogspot.com/2012/05/surrendering-i-letting-go-of-suffering.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MU1Rp184IT4

 

 

Edited August 13, 2022 by Raze

[Panteranegra]

On 8/13/2022 at 3:41 AM, Raze said:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbb_0qNdjjo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NK-rIVi4nLI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsyP80BydV4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVqANXVTLN4

http://happinessbeyondthought.blogspot.com/2012/05/surrendering-i-letting-go-of-suffering.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MU1Rp184IT4

 

 

Interesting resources. I'll take a look at the,

I appreciate if you come up with your own insights.

Is it possible summarize it in a sentence pretending I would understand?

Thank you. 

Edited August 14, 2022 by Panteranegra

[BipolarGrowth]

This is completely normal. Not only normal, it is incredibly beneficial if used correctly. See the cringe as your sign to course correct away from the path which produced that behavior. 
 

I can assure you that I have most likely been far more cringe than you were, and I came out just fine once I recognized the degree of the problem and moved in a better direction. Example of my cringey past: 

 

 

Edited August 13, 2022 by BipolarGrowth

[kag101]

welcome to the club lol

i struggled with that as well. if you feel comfortable, could you elaborate more on what type of memories you cringe?

 

anyway, i've come up with three different strategies to deal with that:

1) just let it pass

i guess the worst approach is to react to the memory and start ruminating about it

so one thing is to simply let the memory go through its course with as least interference from my part as possible.

2) if the wave of cringey memories is too intense, i might do an affirmation such as: 

• in the big-picture of my life, those moments are like a grain of sand.

• it's been a long time, i was confused and lost back then

• it could've been worse

3) use humor

finally, i might exaggerate the situation.

[Loba]

I get that, too.  Sometimes I will look at a post on here that I wrote like a year ago and wonder, "Why did I say that?  Why did I react in that way?"  And then I get this feeling in my gut of disgust in relation to certain habits, egoic dramatic reactions and so forth and try to work through it.  I realize that we are all on a path of growth and everyone has acted in a cringe way at some point in time, no one is completely perfect.  Some people do it more often, some do it less often.  The point is, the fact that you can look at your past self and see where things went wrong and that you've improved are a testament to your growth as an individual.  We are works in progress, we aren't built complete.

Personally, I experience self-cringe often, even just looking at myself from a month ago, I try to improve on my reactions, esp. when it comes to the ego and it's little dramas.  I would view it as a positive thing, it means that you are self-aware and want to improve.  People that don't experience cringe or don't self reflect never grow as people, they remain stuck doing the same stupid stuff and never growing from it.

Have you ever met someone like that, someone that basically just keeps hitting their head against a wall over and over and won't take two seconds to look in the mirror and ask themselves why they are doing that?  Well, you're not like that, if you experience regret for an action you once had.  It's a good thing.

Hope that helps.

[King Merk]

BY LOVING YOURSELF!!! (: 

Everytime I think back to something cringey in the past I give my past self a mental hug. Because that’s what he needed. Love and understanding.

I also show gratitude for how far I’ve come. If you’re not looking back to what you were doing a year or two ago and cringing a little then that’s a sign that you’re not growing.

Cringey reflections = evidence of growth 

[Eph75]

@Panteranegra

It's human, and it can be changed, by focusing on self love.

Understanding and frequently repeating mantras e.g. below is helpful, and relevant:

"I'm sorry, please forgive me, I thank you and I love you."

It's about accepting what we think/feel/do, and who we are and who we've been,  including those moments of cringe as you mentioned. 

Your past is the investment into your current self. Without it you would not be you. And whta happens in near time is the investment into a future self. 

The mantra helps with being grateful for those moments that challenges our ability to self love, and the awareness of them, accept that you've done them, be thankful toward yourself that they have helped you in ways, into awareness and insight, and ask yourself for forgiveness for whatever they might have meant, for yourself and others, but also for the humanity of experiencing the feelings related that make it show up as cringe in this moment.

There's a letting go here, of the past, to be able to focus on the present. 

Further explore self love, and introspect into your experience of "cringe" [and related feelings] to learn where/what you need to forgive yourself about, so that you can truly learn to let it go. It's not about forgetting, it's about accepting, and letting go of the fixations we create in our minds. 

There was a thread on Hoʻoponopono some weeks ago, might be interesting to look it up. 

Edited August 13, 2022 by Eph75

[Tyler Robinson]

Your past self is no longer you. Without all your past experiences you wouldn't be who you're today. That past helped you grow and become the developed version today. 

So basically you are just an iteration in progress. 

So understand that this is how growth works and embrace reality instead of rejecting it. 

Reality is dysfunctional. 

[The Mystical Man]

I've struggled a lot with this, and I'm still struggling with this. I cringe everyday.

Cringe is a physiological and emotional response to foolishness, inauthenticity, and falsehood. You cringe at how out of sync you were with reality. 

I think the key is self-compassion. Treat yourself with dignity. You didn't know any better.

Adyashanti always says, "Treat yourself like someone you care about."

Edited August 13, 2022 by The Mystical Man

[caspex]

Transcending cringe requires understanding cringe.

Cringe is just disgust but more physical in nature. Disgust is a type of hatred which specializes in avoidance. If you cringe at something, you want to avoid it at all costs. When it comes to cringing at behaviors of other humans, that happens because you are too self centered. When you see those actions, instead of compassion, you feel disgust as you'd never want to be like that. The same is true for cringing at behaviors of your past self. Since you never want to be like that, but you were like that, it connects you to being that person, you feel even more disgust and an urge to get away from that reality of you once being like that. This makes you cringe even harder.

In reality, you don't need to, and shouldn't, cringe at your past self to signify your growth to yourself. You can easily see that you have grown without feeling any disgust. How this will happen is, when you look at your past behaviors you'll see the difference between you right now and you then. But that's about it. No cringe. 

 

Knowing all this, the method to transcending cringe is:

1: Be less self-centered by having more experiences that are humbling. 

2: Whenever you catch yourself cringing, dissolve the hatred and attempt to love.

[Thought Art]

1. Totally fine expect that to happen as a given for personal development 

2. more self love

3. feel the feels 

4. let it go bro 

 

[yetineti]

If I were to look at my past and not cringe- it’d mean I’m okay with the same things and have not grown.

To cringe is to recognize you’ve grown.

[Zedman]

FORGIVE YOURSELF!

That's it. I cleared all of the past cringe this way and it doesn't come back anymore. Recent cringe I don't forgive just yet. The lesson haven't set in. Just take your time and do it with full heart. Don't use any arguments! Just forgive yourself out of love.

That's why it comes up. Your mind needs resolutions to these past experiences. Once its resolved and settled its gone. Just be prepared that it will start coming up at larger volumes. I was surprised how many of these I had piled up.

[The Mystical Man]

 

[NoSelfSelf]

By realizing nothing that you do cant change the past, you cant go back and change it,when you get this there will be no point in cringing...