You can't be liked by everyone

[Kksd74628]

Without strong enemies you can't have strong friends

The point I am trying to make is that if you are too average in everything you won't stand out and people won't like you. While we are living in this mainstream society that says what we can't or shouldn't do it is extremely important still to be yourself. If people around you control what you do you'll lose your self-esteem in the process and you'll become sheep who follows. I'll say it as straight as possible; there is no fucking way that I'll ever be close friends with a sheep. That ain't gonna happen. You must have some respect in yourself in order others to respect you, period.

Consequence of being yourself truly is that you'll find enemies and fast. Many people think when this happens that they did spiritually something wrongly, but the thing is that you didn't. It just proves my point right. Do you really think that shapeless personality would ever be interesting? What makes you like someone is their strong personality and I've said it many times but self-expression is art and art is beautiful. That is what makes people really appreciate and love you, authenticity and self-respect.

You are too valuable to be a slave

Grow some balls and stop caring what others think of you, because as long as that matters to you, you're slave for them. Doesn't it bother you even a little that everytime you go socialize yourself you feel this incredible tension that others put on you without asking your permission. It's like you trying to play with your favourite toys and one big boy comes to make fun of you until you hide your toys to your closet. That's fucking unacceptable and disgusting bro ... ... ... OH just be quiet and they won't notice you and do some inner work and just let it go. What the fuck is wrong with you, really. That's not the right approach. That's bullshit.

I don't say that inner work is useless, because it is extremely important, but the thing is that you have to embody your values at some point. It doesn't give me any respect for you if you say that oh my biggest value is this and that if you're living in the complete opposite. It would even be better that your value would be the opposite so you would at least be authentic and that's very much worth a respect from me. How does it feel that your favourite life is in others' hands and they don't give it to you, because it is not something they accept.

Learn to take the L in order to win

What is highly counter-intuitive is that if you try to resist taking lose at micro level you'll take big L of your whole life. Is that what you want? Think about how much others would laugh at you failing your whole life in comparison to making some cringe mistake publicly which others wouldn't even remember after 5 minutes, max. At some point of your life you must bite the bullet and start doing things knowing that it'll be cringe at first. There won't be time in life when things are easy. Right time isn't thing which is offered, but which is made by you.

I mean after reading this post you can continue doing things normally and nothing changes ever. Don't become sad of this fact, but act according of what you want and maybe that doesn't need to be your future. Stop accepting the shit that people drop to you. Say NOW IT IS ENOUGH. Finding fighter inside of you is so empowering feeling that after you find it you wouldn't watch back to your life thinking that you were cringe. It just doesn't matter to your future self or to others so why do you care? Why do you care too much?????

-joNi-

[Sincerity]

Great post!

More people need to hear this.

[Kksd74628]

@DefinitelyNotARobot

How I writed it was just the way it came to my mind, but I agree on the nuance difference for sure. It's not others' fault not to know better. I believe in geneuine friendships where you don't need to be certain way and that's why I have always said that drop the social masks, because otherwise you'd just be inauthentic. By enemies I just meant person who won't accept you and therefore (s)he dislikes you. Usually from these people you get all possible negative junk and I guess no one needs this to their life.

@Sincerity

Thanks for reading it and pm me privately if there is some topic you'd want me to cover.

[hyruga]

Even Jesus cannot be liked by everyone. He saved 10 person but only one came back to thank him.

[Kksd74628]

@hyruga

Good fucking point.

[Loba]

The way I see it, I don't really like most people either, so why should I expect them to like me?  Being liked, unliked, it's all the same to me.  I used to worry about it when I was a young girl, but I found that most of the reasons that people didn't like me for didn't really have to do with me or they were superficial judgements that I couldn't change or didn't feel the need to change.  I've learned that the world is full of selfish egocentric assholes who think that life revolves around them, and I find the human race to be somewhat hideous in their approach to how they deal with one another, so I do myself and the world a favour and just avoid most of them and it works out well for me.

You can't be liked by everyone.  In fact, you can't be liked by most people.  The reality is, most people don't give two fucks and that's life.  The nice thing is that as long as you don't cause a scene, you can blend in with most of them and they'll treat you pretty neutrally.

 

Edited August 7, 2022 by Loba

[Kksd74628]

@Loba

It's all about what cost that blending takes. If it doesn't require you to change your self-expression, values or who you are then yeah you should do it that way, but if it does then I wouldn't do it, because people around you have to understand where you stand or otherwise no one will ever respect you. They'll start to think that they can talk over you, walk over you and tell you what to do. Living life that way drains your self-esteem and after that it's also harder to accept and love others so it all circles back to where it started. Fight, drama and scenes aren't actually too bad if they come from right reasons.

[Loba]

@Kksd74628 Yeah, I can see that and I agree.  I used to be less of a fighter when I was younger as well, but if someone oversteps my boundaries, I have grown up enough to let them know.  It's not my strong suit, I mean, I'm much more vocal about myself online as it's easier to do behind a screen, but in the real world I'll usually give people chances, I won't step out of line for the most part and try my best to get along with others.  But I have had people step on my boundaries before, and granted, I've done it to them as well, it's a learning curve to know when and where to speak up at the right time.  I've spoken up before not knowing it wasn't my place to speak because I thought that my values and opinions were more important than social harmony and have been learning as I am getting older that sometimes social harmony is indeed more important than always sticking true to who you are.  It's a bit of both.

[Kksd74628]

@Loba

Again this is a great example of why everyone should know their top values so well that it doesn't matter what situation it is, beacuse it's always effortless to choose the best option possible. It's all about where you want to go with your life and what alternative leads you here. Sometimes you the situation is pretty much 50/50 and when that is in the case, just do something, because the big picture is what matters. Make right decision 95% of the times and you'll be okay. Also making mistakes grows you so even that's not problem.