Terror of letting go. Feels like pure death

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

I am afraid and really terrified. It takes a lot of loving trust and surrender to life's intelligence.

I did other posts about my kundalini situation. As the energy awakes within your system the body starts performing spontaneous body movements that are designed for clearing your energy system from accumulated imprints.  In my case the body starts whirling and  spinning like a dervish very fast. 

I have come close where the speed would take over completely over the body but shortly I stopped willingly because it scared the hell out of me. I feel very good after but still not able to let go completely. I feel it would be the end. I am afraid of the void I am scared like a child that has lost his mother in the woods.  It's a turning point where one can't go back. 

It's just about trust and trust. But damn god it's brutally challenging. Facing the fear of one's death and dissolution .... I am afraid 

[Carl-Richard]

On 1.8.2022 at 3:43 PM, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

It's just about trust and trust. But damn god it's brutally challenging. Facing the fear of one's death and dissolution .... I am afraid 

I know exactly what you mean.

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

4 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

I know exactly what you mean.

Thanks brother. Could you tell me something more about it

[Carl-Richard]

8 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

Thanks brother. Could you tell me something more about it

 

[Panteranegra]

not an easy task letting your ego die. 

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

It is said that before entering the sea
a river trembles with fear.

She looks back at the path she has traveled,
from the peaks of the mountains,
the long winding road crossing forests and villages.

And in front of her,
she sees an ocean so vast,
that to enter
there seems nothing more than to disappear forever.

But there is no other way.
The river can not go back.

Nobody can go back.
To go back is impossible in existence.

The river needs to take the risk
of entering the ocean
because only then will fear disappear,
because that’s where the river will know
it’s not about disappearing into the ocean,
but of becoming the ocean.

Khalil gibran 

 

[RickyFitts]

42 minutes ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

It is said that before entering the sea
a river trembles with fear.

She looks back at the path she has traveled,
from the peaks of the mountains,
the long winding road crossing forests and villages.

And in front of her,
she sees an ocean so vast,
that to enter
there seems nothing more than to disappear forever.

But there is no other way.
The river can not go back.

Nobody can go back.
To go back is impossible in existence.

The river needs to take the risk
of entering the ocean
because only then will fear disappear,
because that’s where the river will know
it’s not about disappearing into the ocean,
but of becoming the ocean.

Khalil gibran 

 

Perfect.  

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

On 3/8/2022 at 0:12 PM, Judy2 said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua

In my experience these moments of complete despair and weakness can be the most beautiful ones in life...because you have the opportunity to turn them into Love.

Can you recall situations in the past when you've dared the impossible, and then realised that it wasn't so bad after all? Where you were at your weakest, but then out of nowhere found the strength to let go and surrender?

If so, it helps a lot to remind yourself of these situations from time to time. You've done it once, you can do it again;)

 

Yes I agree. Beautiful 

[Eternal Unity]

@Giulio Bevilacqua

You are very close to awakening.

I had the same fear. Let go. God will prevail, the universe won't let anything unreasonable happen to you. 

Writing this, I remember that fear. Have patience, that's one more thing I'll recommend now, don't rush anything.

Peace, 

Greg.

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

18 hours ago, Eternal Unity said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua

You are very close to awakening.

I had the same fear. Let go. God will prevail, the universe won't let anything unreasonable happen to you. 

Writing this, I remember that fear. Have patience, that's one more thing I'll recommend now, don't rush anything.

Peace, 

Greg.

Thanks Brother. Yes its llike taking a jump into a black hole. Now swaying between resistance and surrender 

[Breakingthewall]

On 4/8/2022 at 11:39 AM, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

It is said that before entering the sea
a river trembles with fear.

She looks back at the path she has traveled,
from the peaks of the mountains,
the long winding road crossing forests and villages.

And in front of her,
she sees an ocean so vast,
that to enter
there seems nothing more than to disappear forever.

But there is no other way.
The river can not go back.

Nobody can go back.
To go back is impossible in existence.

The river needs to take the risk
of entering the ocean
because only then will fear disappear,
because that’s where the river will know
it’s not about disappearing into the ocean,
but of becoming the ocean.

Khalil gibran 

 

only the river is not going to become the ocean. It's already the ocean right now, it just doesn't realize it. nothing will change, what is, is. it is a simple matter of perspective.