Interracial And/or Intercultural Relationships

[SFRL]

What are your experiences from dating someone from a different race or culture?

How does your environment react?

Do you run into any differences of opinion or perspective from your partner?

Is it ego driven?

Has who you are attracted to shifted?

 

 

Edited February 9, 2017 by STC

[clytaemnestra]

Excellent. For me personaly it works better than with the men from the country of my origin (South Europe). I like shy, submissive and respectful blondes and in my country men are protective, approaching women and have macho attitude what repells me.

About environment I don't give a shit. It's me being with him, not my environment.

[Annie]

@STC I can't say I was or wasn't attracted to men of my country of origin. We just met one day and fell in love, it just happened. To me nationality/race/culture isn't important as long as we get along. I don't think there are more differences in opinions than in any other relationship (however I do know of couples with different cultures who do have issues with that, it all depends on the personalities I guess).

Absolutely agree with  @clytaemnestra! Who cares what others think as long as you're happy.
 

[Key Elements]

Although people do ask me this question when they find out that my husband and I are from different places and "look" different, the truth is, we are just a husband and wife couple. It's just one world. We don't feel any difference just because. 

[ElenaO]

I am more attracted to guys from a different culture. There was no weird reaction from the environment or at least I haven't noticed one. My parents and the other persons parents both were fine with it. But then again, we are both from Europe, even though come from a different background.

I think we've both grown to understand better other cultures. I really enjoy learning new things (including languages) and people's perspectives. Maybe that's why I am actually attracted to guys from a different environment. Talking in your mother tongue with your boyfriend seems kinda boring to me.

[GeorgeLawson]

This is a particularly interesting question to contemplate for me because I'm British, grew up in the UK and met my Chinese girlfriend at University there. Now I'm currently living in China with her and about to start work here as a TEFL teacher. 

I have to start by saying that this relationship has been a truly positive, growth-inducing experience so far. It has given me the opportunity to develop compassion for human beings regardless of cultural background and race. Not that I was particularly closed-minded beforehand, but having been raised in a generally middle class, white, conservative British background, I feel as though I've been thrown in the deep end and out of my comfort zone by moving over here. The thrill of the experience has really lifted my mood as well, and my girlfriend has been caring and understanding every step of the way. 

Yes, we have our conflicts, and the main one is, unsurprisingly, to do with language. She's pretty amazing at English, (our relationship is based on this language as I'm only beginning to speak basic Mandarin), but we still encounter a few issues when trying to have 'deep' conversations. Sometimes she gets quite upset because she's trying to explain complex emotional feelings which simply doesn't have the language for. I hope that one day I can develop my Mandarin to a point where I can communicate with her complex emotional feelings and attitudes through language...

I've also discovered that the Chinese have deep-rooted Confucian values (similar to the traditional Christian values I experienced in the West). These seem to either consciously or sub-consciously run people's lives here and show-up most boldly in their group-mentality. The Chinese, in general, therefore seem to want to do EVERYTHING together, which is great if you're an extrovert I suppose - but I'm not; I am and always have been an introvert. I sometimes worry therefore that I have less time for solitary activities I enjoy like meditation, reading, writing, contemplation, etc. because I'm constantly being invited now to gatherings for extended family and friends (which my girlfriend's family seem to have every night)! I don't mean to criticise their culture in any way - they're incredibly loving and welcoming people - but sometimes I feel as though I lack to the time to enjoy one of my highest values in life; solitude. Luckily, though, I've discussed this with my girlfriend and she's more than willing to give me space whenever I need it. 

As mentioned by others, I agree that it's not really a good idea to look for a partner based on race/culture, whether they're from yours or not. Just find someone based on their qualities as a human being and go from there. And if you really want to avoid a relationship with someone from your own culture, my best advice is to go travelling. 

[Toby]

The only women I am not open to date are muslim women that have a fundamentalistic family and would threaten to kill me or her. And I also would not date a woman that has criminal friends which is also a "culture". Other than that I am ok with different "races" or "cultures". I only dated one girl so far that was of a different "race" (black), it didn't work out well, but it had nothing to do with "race".

[Shin]

I don't know, I'm not dating Natasha yet !

*sneaky winks*

Edited March 20, 2017 by Shin