Identity after decounstruction!

[NoSelfSelf]

I have spent almost a decade deconstructing ego and basically everything in between ?...

That left me with not very developed identity which makes you not have a real compas in your life so having solid one is really important...

Tough to present yourself to others so they can see who you are etc.

My queastion is for people who found themselves as ego....

How did you find who you are?

What components does identity structure has?

Any pointers for information or how to go about building an identity?

If someone has big picture overview would be awesome!

Where to start from? the self image or what? it feels like overwhelming task to map or create ?

 

 

[Razard86]

2 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

I have spent almost a decade deconstructing ego and basically everything in between ?...

That left me with not very developed identity which makes you not have a real compas in your life so having solid one is really important...

Tough to present yourself to others so they can see who you are etc.

My queastion is for people who found themselves as ego....

How did you find who you are?

What components does identity structure has?

Any pointers for information or how to go about building an identity?

If someone has big picture overview would be awesome!

Where to start from? the self image or what? it feels like overwhelming task to map or create ?

 

 

 

[NoSelfSelf]

@Razard86 That video poped up in my mind actually thinking about this...i should rewatch it how did it help you find or construct your identity?

[Nilsi]

3 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

I have spent almost a decade deconstructing ego and basically everything in between ?...

That left me with not very developed identity which makes you not have a real compas in your life so having solid one is really important...

Tough to present yourself to others so they can see who you are etc.

My queastion is for people who found themselves as ego....

How did you find who you are?

What components does identity structure has?

Any pointers for information or how to go about building an identity?

If someone has big picture overview would be awesome!

Where to start from? the self image or what? it feels like overwhelming task to map or create ?

 

 

You know, I don't think you can ever truly find your real identity.

Go and take some time to think through what you actually want out of this life. Allow yourself to dream and really explore what a meaningful life would look like for you. Maybe you always dreamt of having a wife and kids but told yourself that this is not compatible with your spiritual pursuits; or maybe you always dreamt of living alone in the woods, writing novels; or perhaps you always wanted to travel the world with nothing but your backpack.

You see what I'm getting at? Just follow your dreams and that will turn you into the person you were always supposed to be.

Much love my friend

[NoSelfSelf]

@Nilsi Yes i get it spent aloot of time thinking about what i want and it left me with hobbies i do and few new things i wanna explore...

It seems my dream is creating something that hasnt been created yet so it leaves me with nothing to lach on nothing i can truly express as ?

[Salvijus]

Identity is something u identify with.

If u like pizza very much, peaple will say, "oh it's that pizza guy"

Whatever u like or dislike becomes your identity.

Edited July 25, 2022 by Salvijus

[Nilsi]

1 minute ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Nilsi Yes i get it spent aloot of time thinking about what i want and it left me with hobbies i do and few new things i wanna explore...

It seems my dream is creating something that hasnt been created yet so it leaves me with nothing to lach on nothing i can truly express as ?

Well then just follow those things you want to explore. But come on man. Nothing? Really? Don't think about these things logically. There is no good reason to do one thing over another. But you must have something that you dream of, even if it's just something as small as "I dream of having a great girlfriend and I see us lying on the beach looking up at the stars." That's something worth striving for right there.

[NoSelfSelf]

@Salvijus i get it but its like i need more depth than that ? 

@Nilsi thats the thing how can a girl see who i am show her depth of me when i dont have sense of myself? When i cant see clearly who i am i could show her anything and seeing if something sticks thats horrible ?

 

[Salvijus]

5 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

Salvijus i get it but its like i need more depth than that ? 

Lol. Maybe you're a guy who doesn't not know who he is ? 

Not knowing who u are is what u are ? 

"Look, it's that guy who doesn't know himself"

Edited July 25, 2022 by Salvijus

[Nilsi]

9 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Salvijus i get it but its like i need more depth than that ? 

@Nilsi thats the thing how can a girl see who i am show her depth of me when i dont have sense of myself? When i cant see clearly who i am i could show her anything and seeing if something sticks thats horrible ?

 

Well you aren't really anything more than anything else, are you? You don't have to worry about that so much. All you have to do is get out of your own way and let that which wants to express itself, express itself.

This obviously doesn't help you get there but I don't want you to worry about your identity so much. Just do what you love and get out of your own way, that's really the key to a fulfilling life. As you follow your dreams you will naturally accumulate so many experiences and memories that will shape you and act as a reference from which spontaneous self expression can emerge.

Edited July 25, 2022 by Nilsi

[NoSelfSelf]

@Salvijus Great found my identity ?

@Nilsi you are saying it from pov like someone who has identity if you know your dreams and what experience you should have you have placed an identity before it...

[Salvijus]

@NoSelfSelf

 

[Nilsi]

6 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Salvijus Great found my identity ?

@Nilsi you are saying it from pov like someone who has identity if you know your dreams and what experience you should have you have placed an identity before it...

I'm just trying to help you. I have struggled with this so so much aswell. But what I have found is that there are certain things that I consider meaningful for whatever reason - be it because of past life's or conditioning or whatever - which are pretty robust and have stood the test of time; like having a great girlfriend and travelling and working for something beyond myself and learning about science and philosophy... I know, very original stuff, but that's really all you need to know. The rest is pure spontaneous unfoldment and self-expression and you never know what actually comes next. That's the whole point of it.

Edited July 25, 2022 by Nilsi

[NoSelfSelf]

@Nilsi thing is i dont want to have normal life but dont yet know what life im looking for...dont want a gf and helping humanity means you are developed in your identity if you want to have bigger impact like me because i know that im idealist but dont know in what?

Great life doesnt come spontaniously thats why i made this thread what will come next is more of the same you had in my experience..

[Nilsi]

14 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Nilsi thing is i dont want to have normal life but dont yet know what life im looking for...dont want a gf and helping humanity means you are developed in your identity if you want to have bigger impact like me because i know that im idealist but dont know in what?

Great life doesnt come spontaniously thats why i made this thread what will come next is more of the same you had in my experience..

Hmmm, I prescribe you a movienight and a nightwalk around town

This song always comforts me when I feel lost. Maybe you enjoy it aswell.

 

 

Edited July 25, 2022 by Nilsi

[undeather]

1 hour ago, NoSelfSelf said:

I have spent almost a decade deconstructing ego and basically everything in between ?...

That left me with not very developed identity which makes you not have a real compas in your life so having solid one is really important...

Tough to present yourself to others so they can see who you are etc.

My queastion is for people who found themselves as ego....

How did you find who you are?

What components does identity structure has?

Any pointers for information or how to go about building an identity?

If someone has big picture overview would be awesome!

Where to start from? the self image or what? it feels like overwhelming task to map or create ?

 

 

Think of the great yogis, saints and sages from Moses to Christ to Padmasambhava. They were not feeble-mannered milquetoasts, but fierce movers and shakers-  from bullwhips in the temple, radical acts of selfless love to subduing entire countries. And they did so not because they avoided the physical, emotional and mental dimensions of humanness and the ego that is their vehicle, but because they engaged them with a drive and intensity that shook the world to its very foundations.

Even hardcore neo-adveita teachers do exhibit a strong sense of personality or idendity. 
There is a certain pattern that wants to emerge through you - it shows in your interests, your likes, your dislikes, your aversions - in everything that isnt a concious thought, but an expression of your heart and intuition.

Go out into nature. Start moving into a direction in your life and observe how it feels. Dont try to think this through.
Drop the deconstruction work, do stuff in the real world. Meet friends, play an instrument, look at art. 
Inquire into your psyche - is there an unfulfilled longing for something? 
What is the thing that wants to express? What is the activity that makes you feel alive?
 

Quote

I prescribe you a movienight and a nightwalk around town 

This is great advice as well.

[StarStruck]

Leo already had and has a strong identity. So deconstruction meant that his ego reconstructed fairly fast. If you have a strong identity Leo’s teachings are good for you. If you have a weak ego I suggest you find a different ghuru. I would recommend a gnostic teacher.  They really hammer on this topic of identity. 

[Brittany]

4 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

Tough to present yourself to others so they can see who you are etc.

My queastion is for people who found themselves as ego....

How did you find who you are?

What components does identity structure has?

Any pointers for information or how to go about building an identity?

No one will ever see who you are.

Whatever they see, is not actually you. It can never be.

Not to sound scary. haha But on a metaphysical level, no one can actually see who you are.

Also, you don't "create" who you are. Because who you are never changes from the day you were born. It doesn't ever change.  We all have the same identity ....... in the ultimate truth of things. We share the same identity.

However; you can shape an identity to engage in the human world haha with I AM statements.

 

How do you currently see yourself, right now?

I AM ___________________

(Ex: I am an avid reader.  I am loved. I am whole. I am beautiful. I am caring towards others. I am anxious but take risks. I am good at math. etc.)

 

Who do you want to be in the future?

I AM BECOMING ____________________

(Ex: I am becoming a great chef. I am becoming a parent.  I am becoming a more patient person.  I am becoming more aware.)

And then be proactive on your goals.

 

However; none of this is who you are. This is more changing the human conditioning..... than changing the human identity.

The human identity can not actually be changed from birth. We just usually identity as a million things that we are not.

[NoSelfSelf]

@StarStruck how that has anything to do with my post ??

 

@Brittany can you give an example of your i am and how it helps you in the world and why you chose or have it?

@undeather how can doing things make me form an identity thats what i would be doing not what i am...?

[puporing]

@NoSelfSelf You can also embrace being a shapeshifter depending on the situation to an extent or another... I mean not many options, we're all actors when facing egos, just some realize it some don't.

Just have fun with acting when you can't be "yourself" !

Actually wait... why can't you just be yourself anyway? Well "yourself" is kinda infinite so the options are endless... but you might have some natural tendencies.

Edited July 26, 2022 by puporing