Embodying Decisiveness

[Realms of Wonder]

@Razard86 shared a thread. 

And it really struck a chord with me, the idea of tracking/logging the embodiment journey of specific videos/wisdom. Brilliant.

 

Recently watched the video: How to become Decisive: https://www.actualized.org/articles/how-to-become-decisive

 

Before even watching that video, a choice arose, do I continue down the path I am on, or choose to go to Massage school, a 15 month course, preparing me to become a licensed massage therapist. 

 

Why?

 

1. To grow, expand, experience more, be pushed outside my comfort zone.
2. I love massage, always have, being with peoples knots and blockages, paired with a great rapport/connection, questions, wisdom.
3. A stable, well paying career to continue building my Independent music career on.
4. Less stressful, fewer hours.
5. Fulfillment at work, knowing I am actually HEALING and HELPING people, seeing people grow and get better because of my work.
6. To learn how to Learn.
   1. To learn how to study effectively.
   2. How to make distinctions.
   3. Experience, failure, trial and error and experimentation.
7. Relaxing, calm work environment, with kind and caring co-workers, also health professionals there to help others.

 

After watching the Video, I made a clear decision. I will do it, and have been taking steps to follow through.

• Touring at a the best college in my city, East West College of Healing arts.
• Detailing my goals, Vision, and Why.
• Applying for FAFSA
• Attending a free massage class put on by E.W College. (Tomorrow)

 

The costs of this decision are as follows.

 

1. Will Be difficult, the classes are not easy and are condensed to shorter amount of time to allow graduation in 15 months.
2. Will continue to work during, to pay bills, minimize student loan debt, etc... Meaning I will be stretched.
3. Will give up quantity of music creation during school. from the 10-14 hours per week currently, to 4-5 during school.
4. The challenge of learning to study effectively.
5. The free time I have right now.

Edited July 22, 2022 by Realms of Wonder
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[Realms of Wonder]

Second Decision.

 

To take good care of my body Via Nutrition and food.

 

I have been letting my nutrition, what I have been putting i my body, and my standards around food, slide, a LOT over the last few months. to the point where at work, I will be snacking on anything Gluten free and dairy free, Vegan ice-cream, GF cake, French fries, Fried fritters, Almonds, salami, pepperoni, and so on. 

 

I feel it, my body heavy, the nausea, the lack of energy, the crashes, the lack of alignment with my Values.

 

So last night, as I lay there, wallowing in the consequences of my unconscious food decisions. I choose. I will take goo care of my body.

 

What does that mean?

• No more snacking. (unless I bring them from home)
• No more added sugars.
• Continue being gluten free and dairy free.

As I lay there, and this morning on my walking, thinking and reflecting on how this decision aligns with my values. It aligns with every singe one in one way or another. I have been betraying myself, my values, and my Vision for my life by putting this in my body. There's nothing wrong with me, I still love myself, just realizing what I am doing has been sobering.

 

The cost.

• The pleasure of sugar, snacking, eating.
• To face the underling stress and emotional turmoil causing me to look to food to numb it.
• the work to prep more food, and be more conscious of what I put in my body.
• To say no when my mind tries to convince me "Just this once."
• To say no to others when they offer it.

 

[Realms of Wonder]

This is just the beginning, saying all this means little, the follow through, the struggle, the eventual success, is where this journal will focus on. Plus any more decisions made along the way.

[Realms of Wonder]

Applied to East West College of healing arts. 

[Realms of Wonder]

Day one actually living through the decision to treat my body well. 'Twas a long day at work, stressful, and instead of using the GF cake, or eating some coconut whip, or snacking on fries to cope, I just focused on the work, and allowed myself to feel how I was feeling. A successful day.

[Realms of Wonder]

A major hurdle is building trust with myself, that I will follow through, do what I said I would, and continue to take action aligned with my choice, which ultimately is aligned with my top ten values and vision for life.

[Realms of Wonder]

Day Two: Not an easy day, but proud to know I followed through. No deserts, no fried foods, just salad, chicken, veggies, watermelon, almonds, some bacon, and stevia sweetened cold brew with coconut/oat milk.

 

This is not as hard as I thought it would be. I keep re-committing. This is a choice that aligns with EVERY single one of my values.

[Realms of Wonder]

Admissions interview set for tomorrow, 10:30 A.M, requested transcripts from my old highschool.

Attended a free, 3 hour massage class put on by the college. AMAZING!

[Realms of Wonder]

Yesterday, an easy day to keep my commitment to take care of my body, being at home, with the food I have there. There are no unhealthy options, so nice.

[Realms of Wonder]

Admitted into East West College of healing arts! A 15 month, 800 clinical hour course, meeting all the criteria to apply for and pass the license exam.

[Realms of Wonder]

6 Days since I made the decision to take care of my body, no added sugars, no fried foods, no dairy, gluten or processed foods. 

 

I am surprised at how easy it has been, 99% commitment is a bitch, 100% commitment is a breeze.

[Realms of Wonder]

8 days, going strong, eating veggies, high quality meats, mostly chicken, healthy fats (olive oil, coconut oil, avacado oil,) Fruits, dried and fresh, nuts and seeds, and that.s it.

[Realms of Wonder]

11 days into the diet cleanup. 
 

feeling clean in body, clearer headed, more connected to my body, my congestion has lessened.

 

Staying devoted to my decision, no gluten, dairy, added sugars or sweeteners (aside from stevia,) no fried foods, processed or unpronounceable foods.

[Realms of Wonder]

Day 14, two weeks since I have eaten 

 

Added sugars or sweeteners (aside from stevia and a bit of agave)

Fried foods

processed foods (salami, sauces, etc..)

 

Gluten its been around a year and a half

Dairy its been about 4 months.

Edited August 6, 2022 by Realms of Wonder

[Realms of Wonder]

Today I got confirmation of my class schedule!

Wednesday I will talk with my boss to make him aware of what is happening, and how my work availability will be changing.

[Realms of Wonder]

Still on track with my diet, still no added sugars, gluten, dairy, fried foods, or processed junk. The closest I came was eating Thai food with my family. its been almost 4 weeks since I started, since I made the decision. 

[Realms of Wonder]

35 days since I have eaten added sugars, fried foods, gluten, dairy, or any type of processed food (outside of gluten  free flour.)

 

I though it would be harder than it has been, once I made the decision, clearly defined WHY I wanted to, and the payoffs of the old food habits I would let go of, its been a breeze.

 

"99% is a Bitch: 100% is a Breeze. The 1% can make a world of difference." -Jack Canfield

[Realms of Wonder]

Still holding strong with these decisions.

 

Massage therapy school starts in 24 days! Very excited to begin.

 

Have been eating cleanly (No added sugars, gluten, dairy, fried or junk food) for 48 days now. I feel amazing, still having dips in energy here and there when I over consume carbs, but no judgement, excited to carry this awesome lifestyle change with me into this 15 month marathon of working fulltime, and fulltime school!   

[Realms of Wonder]

One month later. Still on track!

 

Week on of school down, maintaining walk in the morning, and meditation habit (20-30 minutes day do nothing)

Continuing with Diet, now been 77 days since I made the decision, still going strong.

[Realms of Wonder]

Well, its the beginning of a new year, am I still on track?

 

Yes!

 

Aside from thanksgiving and a run in with a white chocolate bar and three uber processed "granola bars." I have continued to eat gluten free, dairy free, no added sugar, and no processed food. Energy levels are consistent and amazing.

 

Today was day 1 of term two at school. Very excited to continue