Nothing seems to help my paranoia. I think I need professional help.

[ThePoint]

I have tried many well known self-help techniques, have tried CBT on myself, have studied philosophies like Stoicism, have tried journaling, and many more. 

Nothing is helping.

I think there is something wrong with my psyche, and the reason why I think that's the case is because, if I used these techniques 2 years ago, they would work fine. In fact I knew about a lot of these techniques & methods before my paranoia even started. 

It made perfect logical sense, that if something is out of your control, it is completely pointless and a waste of time and energy to be fixated on it. I was naturally able to think this way 2 years ago.

But ever since my paranoia started, it has felt like I lost my free will. 

Most of the time, I can't even pinpoint what I am paranoid and anxious about. 

It can be on the smallest things, where I ask myself "What is the worst that could happen?" and my mind won't be able to come up with an answer (because of how trivial the thing I am paranoid about is) and I will still feel like something extremely bad is about to happen.

Like I am talking the anxiety you feel when you are running away from an animal that is about to kill you. I feel that on a constant basis, 24/7, for seemingly no reason. I can't pinpoint the reason why I feel so anxious all the time. 

Are there any books I can read or information I can learn? Or what professional help can I get?

[Mesopotamian]

I am sorry to hear about your situation, and yes I used to have some of these anxiety episodes. 

you said you feel like this 24/7, but is that really the case? can't you experience some peace during your day? like when you first wake up from the morning..and such

[Bojan V]

@ThePoint You are suffering a lot?.I am so sorry.

I can only recommend you try a trauma informed, psychodynamic depth psychotherapy. Soon as possible. If necessery, maybe you will also need some medication prescribed by psychiatrist.

The other important thing to do is a healthy food and excersize too.

The techiques and methodes you've used in the past did not resolve the core issues of your difficulties. These are traumas, repressed, split off parts of your (relative) self. Their origin is in your childhood.

The main solution to that is the therapeutic practice facilitated by a professional psychotherapist or psychiatrist.

Also don't take any drugs or alcohol either.

I hope that helps a little bit. 

Edited July 20, 2022 by Bojan V

[Raze]

Try the ultramind solution and IFS therapy 

[ThePoint]

13 hours ago, Mesopotamian said:

you said you feel like this 24/7, but is that really the case?

@Mesopotamian 

Yes. At the very least, there always a sense of underlying anxiety. Even as I am writing this reply to you. I can feel it in my body. 

13 hours ago, Mesopotamian said:

can't you experience some peace during your day? like when you first wake up from the morning..and such

No. Quite the opposite. It's the worst when I first wake up.

As soon as I wake up, I get a rush of anxiety - like something bad is going to happen and I have no control over it. 

I also feel extremely exhausted every time I wake up, which adds to how hard it is to get out of bed. 

[Loba]

I relate to feelings of paranoia, there was a time when I let it take control of my life.  I would think people were thinking bad things about me and talking about me behind my back and I felt bullied and ostracized.  What helped me the most was starting a journal and writing about these experiences to see them in a clearer light.  Just putting awareness on where you are feeling paranoid can help you unravel why it is happening.

I am sorry you are going through this, it can be a very painful and miserable thing to go through, but don't lose hope!

[Carl-Richard]

What do you eat?

[ThePoint]

11 hours ago, Bojan V said:

I can only recommend you try a trauma informed, psychodynamic depth psychotherapy. Soon as possible.

@Bojan V 

This sounds very good. But the hard part is... where can I find someone like this? 

I have heard about IFS Therapy. What are your thoughts on that? Does it fit the description of "trauma informed, psychodynamic depth psychotherapy"?
 

11 hours ago, Bojan V said:

The other important thing to do is a healthy food and excersize too.

Ah... that's what I forgot to mention - I have also tried multiple diets; carnivore, ketogenic, paleo, autoimmune paleo, plant-based (did not work). 

None of them made any noticeable impact. I was so optimistic that at least one of those diets would work when I was experimenting with them, but to no avail. 

11 hours ago, Bojan V said:

Also don't take any drugs or alcohol either.

Never have, and probably never will. I'm grateful that I have never touched either of them because I can pretty much guarantee I would get addicted to them with what my life is like right now.

6 hours ago, Raze said:

Try the ultramind solution and IFS therapy 

Ah... there it is - Another IFS Therapy recommendation   

I've seen IFS Therapy being recommended so many times on this forum, it's time I actually try it. 

What is the best way to go about it? Read the books? Go to a IFS certified therapist? 

@Ulax What are your thoughts? 

@Raze Is ultramind solution the book by Dr. Hyman? 

[ThePoint]

12 minutes ago, Loba said:

What helped me the most was starting a journal and writing about these experiences to see them in a clearer light.  Just putting awareness on where you are feeling paranoid can help you unravel why it is happening.

I know about this and still do it. But there is something in my psyche that is stopping the journaling practice from "clicking", if you know what I mean. 

It refuses to be relieved. I just want it to get out of my head.

I want to live in the present moment. Its pull is just so strong... it uses arguments that trigger the survival aspect of my brain. My paranoia says "Noooo... you need to be on the lookout for threats. You need to survive." – PLEASE JUST SHUT UP!!! I BEG YOU!

7 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

What do you eat?

A healthy diet. No junk food, processed foods, no drinks other than water, nothing unhealthy. I've tried many diets (see my reply above) but with little to no success.

[Carl-Richard]

24 minutes ago, ThePoint said:

A healthy diet. No junk food, processed foods, no drinks other than water, nothing unhealthy. I've tried many diets (see my reply above) but with little to no success.

Literally what do you consume in a day?

[Bojan V]

@ThePoint I'm from Slovenia, so i don't know where you, in your country, can find a therapist. Here in Slovenia they are all online. We have different types of depth therapy - psychoanalytical, developmental analytical, jungian etc. I'm not familiar  with IFS therapy, so i can't say anything about it.

Edited July 21, 2022 by Bojan V

[Mesopotamian]

@ThePoint Upon reading your reply I feel like I remember a part of my life when I had this kind of anxiety, and I didn't know how to describe it or what it is actually, and I used to feel annoyed by that.

The source of my anxiety was the fact that I am living in Iraq, where things get out of hand every now and then, above that there were news about possible future disasters like a dam that could collapse and kill 500 thousands people in 24 hours. 

I think what helped me to be calmer is that I learned how to get to a place that enables me to be safe psychically, and also watching lots of videos from Leo, which helped me recontextualize things in a totally new manner

Do you think you can share what type of life you're living? with what people? and such... it would help to try to figure out the effect of your surroundings on you.. 

[Elisabeth]

It's ok to need professional help. 
Find both a psychiatrist and a therapist you feel comfortable with. 

The psychiatrist can prescribe medication, which will get you out of the worst into a state of mind where you can actually do effective therapy and self-help again. 

The therapist will not only guide you through techniques. A big part of every therapy is the trusting relationship that you form with him or her. Any emotionally expressive techniques actually do work better, if you have someone nearby who keeps calm when you are not and helps name and mirror back to you whatever it is you are experiencing. 

[ThePoint]

On 7/21/2022 at 2:50 PM, Carl-Richard said:

Literally what do you consume in a day?

• @Carl-Richard
• Chicken
• Vegetables
• Brown rice or no rice
• Water
• Sometimes some fruits like bananas and dates

I'm still open to any suggestions when it comes to diet, but odds are that I've likely exhausted them. I've tried all types of diets over the past couple of years. I felt the best on carnivore, but that's not a diet to be done long-term.

On 7/21/2022 at 7:27 PM, Bojan V said:

@ThePoint I'm from Slovenia, so i don't know where you, in your country, can find a therapist. Here in Slovenia they are all online. We have different types of depth therapy - psychoanalytical, developmental analytical, jungian etc. I'm not familiar  with IFS therapy, so i can't say anything about it.

@Bojan V

Where do you find such therapists? Do you just google it? 

 

[Razard86]

I once felt paranoia when I admitted myself to the hospital in the past. What worked for me was I constantly told myself that the thoughts that were arising simply weren't true. Instead of fighting them, I just disagreed and ignored them and focused on other things. It took a lot of energy especially being surrounded by so many others who were unstable, also the medication I was receiving helped as well for that time period as my reality was unstable.

Best advice I can give is observe yourself, I mean really observe yourself. Are you attaching/engaging with your thoughts? Don't do that. See it, acknowledge it, disagree, and focus elsewhere. Consider your ego like an A.I. that is tasked with protecting you. Its a part of you, but it isn't you. Its the passenger, the part of you tasked with assisting you. So once you realize it isn't you, its just your assistant take back your power. 

[ThePoint]

5 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

I once felt paranoia when I admitted myself to the hospital in the past.

@Razard86 Why did you need to go the hospital? 

6 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

What worked for me was I constantly told myself that the thoughts that were arising simply weren't true.

But how do you know they weren't true? Sure, they might not be true at the moment you're having them, but they can be true in the future.

Like I am paranoid about bad things that could happen to me in the future. They might not be true right now, but they could be true in the future. 

8 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

It took a lot of energy especially being surrounded by so many others who were unstable, also the medication I was receiving helped as well for that time period as my reality was unstable.

Sorry you had to experience that. What medication were you on? Why was your reality unstable?

I am really interested in learning more about your story, especially since you are a massive value provider in this forum from what I've seen (yes, I've seen some of your value-packed posts while I might not replied to them). I am interested in seeing how you got from your unstable reality to where you are now, assuming your reality is stable now. 

13 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

Best advice I can give is observe yourself, I mean really observe yourself. Are you attaching/engaging with your thoughts? Don't do that. See it, acknowledge it, disagree, and focus elsewhere. Consider your ego like an A.I. that is tasked with protecting you. Its a part of you, but it isn't you. Its the passenger, the part of you tasked with assisting you. So once you realize it isn't you, its just your assistant take back your power. 

How can I tell if I am attaching/engaging with my thoughts?

I like your analogy. But what I am seeing is that my ego is so focused on protecting me that it's neurotic. I don't think it's normal to constantly feel anxious and fearful all day, 24/7. My ego should realize that it's only making me feel worse to always feel negative emotions all the time. 

It would be normal to have bouts of anxiety, e.g. before a job interview or an exam. But 24/7? Surely that isn't right. 

[ThePoint]

@Razard86

Using your analogy as an example, it's like my assistant (ego) is constantly saying, "alert! alert! danger! danger! caution! caution!" ALL THE TIME. It's looking out for potential dangers and is either trying to scheme how to manipulate its way out of it, or if the scenario its fearing is out of its control, it just panics. 

[Bojan V]

@ThePoint Yes i just google it. There is an on-line service site, where all the therapists have their profile where it's possible to choose a therapist and then work with them either online or in person.

[Carl-Richard]

9 hours ago, ThePoint said:

• @Carl-Richard
• Chicken
• Vegetables
• Brown rice or no rice
• Water
• Sometimes some fruits like bananas and dates

You eat the same thing for breakfast, lunch and dinner? That sounds like a fine dinner (if you do 30-50% vegetables by weight), but for breakfast, I suggest upping fat intake, maybe cut the amount of fruits in half. I eat 3 eggs, a tiny amount of bread and half a kiwi (or other fruit equivalent) every morning, and if I eat more fruit, I can get anxious. Too much sugar and carbs can make you anxious by spiking blood sugar (same mechanism as adrenaline), and anxiety and paranoia are linked. Fats also stabilize blood sugar and are necessary for brain health (proteins as well). Because of my breakfast, I only need to eat every 6 hours or 3 meals a day (breakfast, dinner, leftovers). There is a potential health trade-off when you consider the cholesterol in eggs, but being anxious and chronically stressed is also bad for your health.

[Mesopotamian]

Hey have you tried experimenting with this? seems that it works for me

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMNVgmnky/?k=1