blacksapp

I Have No Subjects When Talking To Girls And With People, Help?

9 posts in this topic

Hey guys, good morning.
I'm facing this problem in self-development process:
I've had depression and this time made me get into like a zombie mode and I kinda don't have subjects with people and idk how to start a conversation n stuff...looks so akward when I try to get close to someone and just have a damn normal conversation.
I'm doing meditation and it gets better but sometimes I just normally get myself too quiet and can't think about an subject...
Any tips? 

Edited by blacksapp

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@blacksapp ask things you ask yourself and things you want to know about her. ask then listen. ask then listen.


unborn Truth

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@blacksapp I agree. Ask and listen. Ask open ended questions. Be a learner and really take an interest when someone talks about something you can't relate to. Find the agreements. 

 

Priming yourself is another option. Like watch a video about confidence, or making social situations easy, or talking to girls, or whatever. A simple 5 minute video can tune you and get you in a helpful state of mind. 

The depression stands out to me as the underlying cure though. Are you able to exercise? Talk to a dr maybe, and or a nutritionist. Watch Christmas Vacation again? 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Get into a positive state of mind. Once you feel confident, you could explore stuff that you can discuss about. Read books, articles, watch movies, hang out with other friends. Once you get more social and creative, ideas will pop on their own. You can then find interesting topics and ideas to discuss with her. Keep your mind open. 

Edited by Loreena

  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just see everything you say as important. It's mainly how you say something, that determines how something is perceived. You could talk about something really interesting, if you don't but the energy behind it is worthless. You can talk about something completely unimportant and with the right energy it will still be perceived as interesting. Just start practicing, your energy will follow up. Maybe take someone you have known for a long time an start experimenting how you can achieve such energy. And always remember as I said: everything is important.

If you find something where you can really go deep in a certain topic, within this process, - even better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you, guys!
I will try to get a little confidence, and then try to start small talks to get somewhere and 'train' a little bit!
Thanks!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't focus on yourself only. It also depends on the other person and the chemistry or connection you have with them. With some there is just nothing really to talk about, even though they might seem attractive to you on some level. That is at least my experience.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I got a challenge for you.

Sit down, clear your mind and visualize yourself speaking with people.  Not just that but visualize yourself not caring/overthinking shit, being confident, and being well spoken.  Also visualize them being interested in what you are saying.  Visualize yourself as someone you see on television who speaks well and confidently and is a great conversation starter.  Visualize that it is you.  Now while visualizing this try get a sense of where you are in this visualization.  Is there a smell?  Maybe there's a smell from the person you're speaking to or a smell of a bakery just across the way.  Is it raining?  Sunny? Snowing?  Visualize it so it is like you're actually there speaking confidently with this person/girl.  What you need to do is visualize for 15-30 minutes every day of you speaking confidently and making the conversation flow.  Do this for 21 days/3 weeks and see if there is any improvement.

Your subconscious doesn't notice the difference between reality and imagination...so doing this visualizing is basically like practicing it in reality.  This is why visualization is so powerful and why Leo recommends it in many of his videos.

p.s change visualizations every day..so for example the setting, person, smells etc.

 

Edited by Evilwave Heddy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now