How to stop losing momentum in life, and dealing with the guilt?

[GroovyGuru]

I've begun to notice that I feel a lot of guilt in my life because I often fail to live up to the high values and standards I set for myself. When I am living up to my values and engaging in the positive habits I've determined for myself, I obviously feel much better and more grounded, confident etc. The problem is that I have an issue with being consistent, and sometimes it doesn't take much for me to be totally derailed. This bothers me because if I can't even maintain consistency with what I consider the basics of life, how will I ever level up?

To give some prespective, I would like to share a few of the daily habits that I value but sometimes fail to live up to: 

• Waking up at 7am or earlier each day
• Eating enough food every day (I lift weights so if I don't eat right, what's the point?)
• Being very productive at work
• 20 min of sunlight each day
• Physical activity each day
• Study foreign language and read 20-50 pages 
• Limit phone and social media use
• 8 hours of sleep
• Explore/do new things on my free days
• Limit unhealthy habits and potential addictions such as video games, porn, nicotine, booze etc

Although I can do really well with all of these things for a time, I always inevitably end up betraying myself in at least some of the things listed, and am consumed by guilt as a result. For example, I work from home and have a very flexible job, so I often wake up randomly, past 8am and often don't work very hard because some days I just don't have a lot of work (I'm a web developer). I also feel extremely guilty and disgusted with myself when I fall back into the consumption of porn and video games. I also feel very guilty when I stop working out and don't eat healthy or consistently for a period of time (this never lasts longer than like 2 weeks, but still).

When I am in a period that I would consider unproductive or in betrayal of my values, I am still doing better than the majority of my friends and peers (I'm hard on myself). And EVEN when I AM in alignment and doing the habits consistently, I still can't help but feel a bit of guilt because I know I can do/be even better, and I'll often reflect about the other areas in my life in which I still feel are empty and lacking, such as my totally nonexistent dating life, or relative lack of adventure in my life.

Does anyone have any tips on either how to deal with this guilt, and/or how to finally stop losing my momentum and just be consistent with the basics. Does Leo or anyone have a video discussing these themes? I would be curious to hear your thoughts...

[hyruga]

 

[puporing]

You have to "re-wire" yourself so that you take joy and satisfaction in those things you're trying to do more of. Might have to "trick" yourself at first but the more you do it the more it sticks. Getting into the mindset that by doing so you're honoring your life. 

Guilt is not the best motivator. Develop a compelling vision and identify your top values, then the ability to identify and follow-through with the right actions become effortless.

Edited July 15, 2022 by puporing

[bazera]

@GroovyGuru I'm just like you, feeling guilty most of the time when I fail to live up to the high standards that I set for myself. 

Maybe just appreciating your overall developmental progress, comparing your current self to your old self will give you a better perspective than guilt. 

Also, I like to look at this guilt and anxiety as part of emotional labour that has to be done for me to step up. Maybe feeling that guilt fully is a better option than avoiding it.

Leo recently posted a video called How To Fall In Love With Life, that helped a lot.

[hyruga]

This kind of guilt that you dealt with are small. Just forgive yourself. 

There's other ways to deal with guilt. For example, if you accidentally kill a dog indirectly by knocking onto him and the dog somehow die of old age/injury few months down the road, what you can do is donate to dog charity to reduce your karmic debt.

Another way is to renew your life to God, the Christian way.

[Razard86]

Guilt is denial of what is true. What is true is you were never guilty. Your higher self will never judge you, judgment only resides in the ego. Your human self is born empty handed and dies empty handed. So there is no value in any of those things you listed outside of the value you place on them. So do them at your own pace, and adjust your standards to fit where you are.

You are worthy of love from yourself. You are complete. No accomplishment will ever define you, its a hard lesson you will learn. No accomplishment will ever make you feel complete. Now with that said it is important to keep the promises you make to yourself so choose things you know you want to do and slightly choose more challenging things gradually over time. 

 

[BipolarGrowth]

Maybe feeling guilty for not giving it your all is a good thing. 

[preventingdiabetes]

@Razard86 If you don't judge yourself for not living up to your highest potential how do you motivate yourself to live up to your highest potential?