I accidentally became someone’s girlfriend

[Raze]

You can keep seeing him to see if you become attracted to him. Women can sometimes become attracted to someone later, and often being instantly attracted to a guy can actually be a bad sign for a long term relationship.

[Byun Sean]

If you've been feeling like this the whole time I would say its a sign of incompatibility and break it off.

 

Find someone who you have no question in wanting to spend time with in the ways you want.

Edited July 10, 2022 by Byun Sean

[hyruga]

Confront him and let him know what you think. 

Edited July 13, 2022 by hyruga

[Razard86]

On 7/2/2022 at 7:06 PM, Roy said:

You need to break up with him, like cut it cold. That's the mature thing to do that will save you both future pain and time. Share how you feel and your uncertainties, and accept the possibility you might come off as an asshole while doing it.

Being with someone you aren't attracted to is a waste of your time and theirs, and it's insulting too. Like how deep are you going to go into this relationship until you are confronted in some moment and have to look into his eyes and say you never really felt that much for him?

That kind of thing can be devastating and completely avoidable if you just bite the bullet now.

This isn't an arranged marriage. You aren't obligated to stick around for years to stoke a fire and build a relationship from ground zero attraction. What you need is to be actively dating and screening for guys that make you go head over heels, and discard the rest (nicely). If you aren't sure that you like them or want to be with them by date 2 or 3 you simply need to move on.

More good advice. You guys are on a roll!!

[Razard86]

On 7/2/2022 at 7:13 PM, Raze said:

You can keep seeing him to see if you become attracted to him. Women can sometimes become attracted to someone later, and often being instantly attracted to a guy can actually be a bad sign for a long term relationship.

True....but I intuitively feel this isn't the case but it is certainly a valid possibility as well. I would still suggest a woman figure out her feelings before allowing a man she knows likes her to believe he has a shot with her wanting to be with him romantically.

Men and women can only be friends if both do not find each other attractive. If one finds the other attractive it can lead to a host of issues and pain. In most cases Men and women cannot be friends. In some cases it is no problem and depends on the maturity level of both parties involved.

[ALLIS]

Follow your hearth

What hearth says?

[soos_mite_ah]

Update: I decided to not have the conversation with him after I had a few days to calm down about all of this. I was still willing to give this a chance because there was something in my intuition telling me to do so. It was surprisingly easy for me to keep in touch with him during that month and a half and I took that as a sign that I can see this person being in my life. 

When I came back to the U.S., I was still nervous about potentially getting the ick from him. I decided to get a little bit more physical because 1) I was touch starved, 2) I felt like I didn't have enough info about how I felt about him, and 3) I was moving into my college dorm and I finally had more  privacy. I would say after that I was pretty sure that even though I wasn't exactly attracted to him, it wasn't so bad to where it would affect our relationship or that I'm like turned off by him. I could see that as something that could grow over time. 

Fastforward like a month to now, I feel like we have a very healthy and solid relationship. I feel very comfortable around him both physically and emotionally and we're both really good at communicating with one another. He treats me really well and of course I like to reciprocate. I do feel like I am growing more attached to him and that I definitely like him now that I've known and dated him for a little over 4 months now. Attractionwise I feel like it's going to take some more time as we deepen our reltionship for this to grow. I do feel something attractionwise but I will admit that it's still not to the point where I'm attracted to him just yet. Honestly, I think I might be demisexual at this point. 

[Tron]

sucks to be the guy youre dating lol 

 

if I saw this thread, I would dump you 

Edited September 14, 2022 by Tron

[soos_mite_ah]

@Tron why lol? I didn't say anything bad about him other than that it's taking me a minute to feel attraction and I'm trying to figure out where my sexuality falls under this. I mean, I enjoy being around him and we work well together.