Leo, what is your take on humility?

[Mikey]

Have you ever been in a room filled with people you didn't know, or maybe you just didn't understand the purpose of the gathering? Like say it was to hang out but there wasn't any food, or a live game on, there were no board games, there was no alcohol, and so on... Just a room. And these people seemed to have quite fascinating stories about life, relationships, and so on... but the main point or topic just seemed to be so uninspiring? Like why am I even here if I'm introverted, I don't know these people, which means I don't care. But at the same time, you see how they're bonding and you ask "How come I can't do that?" I've always wondered, that this is Hell in its entirety. Seeing other people happy and socializing, while also feeling worthless and unmotivated. How do I become ok with this? Would it be more egoic to leave the room, or to stay in the room? The point is, if I stay in the room, I am left with bad feelings, and I feel like I'm giving off a bad vibe.
Almost like I'm just straight up disrespecting them if I don't say anything positive in the next 10 seconds. Like... does this mean I need to stop contemplating complex matters and focus more on enjoying people's company and boring stories? Like it's some blind spot of mine and the ultimate challenge of life and also they key to awakening? Maybe...

[Tyler Robinson]

Focusing on complex matters will help you grow at an exponentially faster rate, socializing with people is mostly a part of survival and needs mastery. 

 

[Leo Gura]

This isn't a humility issue.

I'm super introverted, but I have taught myself to go out to dumb clubs and just have fun with dumb friends on a dumb level.

Learn how to party. You can learn to put yourself into extroverted states. It's good for ya. Also good for getting girls and making friends.

[UnbornTao]

Definitely. Being alone is my preferred choice most of the time. Of course socialization is something I enjoy too, but it's like going on a vacation. When it happens, a lightweight approach is taken, being humorous and simply enjoying other's company.

Getting out of one's head is healthy. Be in your body, be playful. Do it often.

Edited June 28, 2022 by UnbornTao

[RendHeaven]

I agree with Leo (partly).

It's healthy to have the capabilities of "letting go" of high social expectations. Be able to get dirty and involved with people.

Your insistence that this room isn't for you is an ego defense mechanism.

The majority of human communication is shallow nonsense, but crying about it to yourself just enables your social impotence.

So, get crackin'. Put yourself out there.

That being said, after a while you might get sick of the shallow shit. This always ends up happening to me.

At that point, respect your inner muse and begin to filter out the people in your life.

Only allocate your time to mature people you deem worthy.

But you see, beggars can't be choosers.

You're probably tempted to skip to this higher stage where you call the shots and cut people out.

But you can't authentically do that while you're still incapable of connecting to people.

Edited June 28, 2022 by RendHeaven

[Hello from Russia]

Meh, my problem is that if people at least a little bit smarter, our conversation turn into a philosophical shitshow

It's great, but I still feel unfulfilled because so much of the time is spent on correcting their epistemics vs actually trying to grasp the truth or finding some new insight. You start to feel like a therapist or coach dealing with their bullshit, lol

But then I just can't help myself because usually people are so shallow and don't care about any of this stuff at all, so even if a guy has shitty epistemics but at least philosophically minded to some degree it feels good

I guess just gotta find the right pack

 

[gettoefl]

no need to be out of your comfort zone, if people are dumb and won't advance me, i am out

group dynamics is hard so if it is not conducive i won't waste time

one on one i give people every chance, the dumbest are the funnest especially when you are pretty dim yourself, everyone is god's gift