Louis’ Journal

[Ulax]

On 27/09/2022 at 8:28 PM, PretentiousHuman said:

Day 83:

@Ulax

Like some of what Leo’s teachings that i acquired for over years of watching hin over the YouTube are as follows:

Healthy:

1. Meditation 2. Journaling 3. Prayer 4. Workout 5. Eating healthy foods 6. Avoiding negative people, things 7. Watching Leo 8. Taking Supplements 9. Reading books that interest me. 10. Listening to classic songs 11. Walking my dog 12. Walking around nature

Unhealthy:

1. Vaping 2. Smoking 3. Watching porn. Eating junk foods 4. Gossiping

What do you think?

How about you?

Thanks for your reply.

Regarding how to calm my mind, I like noting meditation 

[PretentiousHuman]

@Ulax so you meditate a lot?

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 85:

I have done a lot of things this day and i am fulfilled. Will do it again tomorrow. 

[Ulax]

@PretentiousHuman

10 minutes ago, PretentiousHuman said:

@Ulax so you meditate a lot?

I'd say I do it somewhat regularly. I'd also say there's a fair amount of variety in terms of how often I do it for during different periods of my life. Sometimes 2 hours a day, sometimes 10 minutes, sometimes none. I want to be more consistent, but I also don't trust that meditation is always an effective thing to do.

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 86:

The day was productive. I have done what I needed to do. Dis my errands. 
 

Tomorrow would be a less work, and more on focus-which is reading. 

[PretentiousHuman]

@Ulax I do it regularly, almost everyday. 10 minutes and concentrating only on my breathing. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 87:

Had a wonderful day. Less of telling people what to do now. Focus on relaxation, just being in the moment and enjoying what is happening with me. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 88:

I resisted for the first time porn and masturbation. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 89:

I’m on my way of stopping masturbation and porn in my life. I also stopped posting at Facebook but still continuing doing it at Instagram. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 90:

Focus, breathe, relax, be yourself, guard your heart. 

[Wisebaxter]

Sounds like you're having some good growth. It always amazes me hoe simple the most profound insights are. Focus, breath, relax. Relaxation seems like the highest wisdom to me. 

[PretentiousHuman]

@Wisebaxter Thank you. Yes, i can see that and things that i prioritize now are the ones making me a better person that Leo always teaches in most of his videos. But i still have some setbacks that i experience every day and will forgive myself whatever that means for self love. 
How about you, what are the practices your partake in to have a profound growth in your life?
 

Day 91: Still have some painful experiences from my past lover. But continually moving forward in regaining my balance and zest of life. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 92: I’m having some panic attacks and anxiety again. 

Edited October 21, 2022 by PretentiousHuman

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 92-B:

Things will get worse before they get better. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 93:

Feeling fine but still missing my ex. I’m trying to let things now, most especially the things i cannot control and focus more on the things i can control like my health, mindset, work, activities, foods i consume, people i hang out with. Etc. I’m on my way of improving myself, and I won’t settle to less than i really deserve. Knowing that i can get what i really want. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 94:

Feeling good, after being able to control my day. Will do it again tomorrow, by deliberately controlling my thoughts. Will get all my journaling into my Virtual Notes tomorrow. 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 95:

I am afraid of my self when i am alone with my self. Because anxiety and depression won’t leave me. 
I have to go outside for me to regroup. 
in time though, I will be able to over this. 

[Wisebaxter]

On 21/10/2022 at 3:42 AM, PretentiousHuman said:

Day 92: I’m having some panic attacks and anxiety again. 

Sounds weird, but have you ever tried trying to have panic attack when you're having one? Or saying something like 'let's make this a good one?' I've found it almost trips the fear circuit in my brain. 

Quote

How about you, what are the practices your partake in to have a profound growth in your life?

I think that developing the capacity to love has helped a lot. I got a lot from a YouTuber called Matt Kahn. This could look like accepting every circumstance as being part of a perfection, or like showing compassion to an angry boss. It could also look like loving the parts of myself that I couldn't before, shadow work etc. For me it's as simple as saying 'I love you' to whatever arises. If there's resistance, I just love that. It's almost like love is the answer to every question, which makes my life more simple. thanks for asking  I think I've gotten a lot of growth from just getting a job I quite like too, and a nice girlfriend. She has an 11 year old and I thought I'd struggle with the responsibility but it's grown me a lot. It allows me more opportunities for selflessness. These kinds of life choices can't be beaten for growth in my opinion. We can meditate until we're blue in the face but hanging out on the bottom level of Maslow's triangle is way too stressful lol. Saying that, meditating, self awareness and Mindfullness do help me make better life choices that are more aligned with who I am, so it's all intertwined. 

It's also worth mentioning a meditation I found by Joe Dispense, where he gets you to focus on what you want in the morning and visualise it, before visualising what you don't want. A lot of good things happened for me around the time I was doing it. 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aMs5IWhZOU9autgCqYaOiYcWyAIYj5vd/view?usp=sharing

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aMs5IWhZOU9autgCqYaOiYcWyAIYj5vd/view?usp=sharing

 

As for the porn, have you tried doing the counter-intuitive thing and just letting yourself do it? Going crazy with no restraints? Sometimes the resistance adds fuels to the fire. Also, love the guilt when it arises and love the part of you that wants to revel in your own beautiful creation, experiencing it through the senses. Try that and Dr Joe's approach of visualising what you want into existence. A lot of this maybe familiar to you seeing as you follow Actualized.  

Edited October 27, 2022 by Wisebaxter

[PretentiousHuman]

@Wisebaxter Thank you for commenting on my posts. I will surely reply to you tomorrow as i am packing my stuff for tomorrow’s travel. Thanks. 

Day 96: I am stoked for tomorrow for i will have a 5 day Nature trip including my Birthday Celebration on November. It would be on the mountains so it would be beautiful. There’s a typhoon going on in our country so it would be rainy going there. Let’s go! 

[PretentiousHuman]

Day 96:

Sagada

 

Temperature is at least 18 degrees celsius or below,

Beautiful vibrations from the locals brighten these gloomy, soaked mountains. 

Hot coffee or choco, always suitable to warm the body,

Enticing chitchats fill all hospitable cafes. 

 

Blessed with natural resources, beauty beyond comparison. 

Attractive faces of the women, you would want to marry in the first glance. 

Clouds always covering the hot sun. 

But this is the place where a lot of blessings grow. 

 

Proceed to the higher altitudes and your time will run slow. 

You don’t have to hurry anything because the roads are small. 

One wrong slip and you will meet your Creator. 

Fogs and mists appear here all the time as if you’re already in heaven. 

 

Pine trees towering anywhere you set your vision. 

People cherish their environment and they are repaid with bountiful crops. 

Once you get here, you don’t want to leave the place. 

Ecstatic in every second, if you choose to be  in that state of mind. 

 

-Louis Perez’ Poetry #30