Posted February 3, 2017 (edited) All of my previous ambitions in life were ego-driven, and I am grasping for purpose and direction. I of course am focused on raising my consciousness, but there are certain times I feel like everything I thought I knew was just a fucking-joke. What have I done with my life? Why am I even pursuing some of this stuff? I've had a really bad case of oneitis for a girl for a while, and I've become conscious of how it was all a desperate need for validation and self-esteem. All the pain I've felt was never due to my love, but due to my insecurity. But wait, who the fuck am I validating? I've been self-inquiring and I just don't even know where those needs are coming from. Who is it that wants all that? Paradoxically, I'm trying to do classic personal development and get tangible results in my life, but it feels kind of silly because I know from developing the bigger picture that I'm just going to outgrow those things. I'm working super hard and creating abundance in my social and dating life right now, but I can already see that it won't fulfill me, despite how badly I want it. I wonder, would I be better of not even trying for those things and pursuing consciousness and life purpose full-time, or should I keep going so I can remove my doubts? What if I'm making the wrong choice? I don't know. Edited February 3, 2017 by username Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted February 3, 2017 1 hour ago, username said: I wonder, would I be better of not even trying for those things and pursuing consciousness and life purpose full-time, or should I keep going Why can't you do both? Isn't everyday life consciousness too? My Blog : : Pure Experiences : : Pure Knowledge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites