ThePoint

How do I stop caring about what people think of me?

6 posts in this topic

I keep compulsively texting and chatting with some people even though I don't care about them.

I don't even see myself talking to these people in a year from now, I just still talk to them because we are in the same school.

But I can't stop talking to them and texting them. Every time we get in a conversation via messages I compulsively respond even though I should be doing other things. This is because I care about what they think of me. 

I have ADHD so this might be Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. 

But I need to stop caring about such trivial things like what people think of me. I have a limited time on this life and I feel like I am wasting so much of my time by caring about what people think of me. 

Are there any good books, courses, or material on this topic? 


Don't wait for things to get better. Take proactive action.

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Leo said in his The Power of Letting Go video that neuroticism is holding on and clinging to something without being able to let it go. That is exactly me. I am being neurotic in that I can't let go of what I am holding on and clinging to. Why can't I just let it go? I know logically that it is not serving me but I still can't let it go. 


Don't wait for things to get better. Take proactive action.

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Hello..... ummm I don't know if you know this....ADHD has never been scientifically proven. Even worse there is no real generally accepted criteria on what constitutes it. Furthermore if you do research into the whole field of Child Psychology and the impact of the creation of this specific diagnosis you would realize the harm it has done. So first off....stop saying you have ADHD. You don't have ADHD, you have a brain that has been influenced heavily by modern technology and has gotten use to constant stimulation and dopamine hits. As a result...you don't know how to just "be." That's the problem with us humans who are raised in Modern culture... we are use to constant stimulation. Its why meditation is so hard for us. We literally cannot sit still for even 20mins and just exist without having to do something.

 Yes you do care about what people think and this is normal, if you didn't care about what people think you wouldn't be so agreeable and self-reflective. The more agreeable and self-reflective you are, what some term self-conscious the more you care about what people think. This is also associated with empathy as well. Its not a bad thing...you just need to balance it....with a healthy dose of I care about what I think more.

Its okay to be a little selfish, without that you will never be able to become an individual and truly express your authentic nature. Also....don't be so judgmental about yourself, take it easy. As you go through life you will grow and improve....this is going to happen whether you try to or not. Sure it will take some effort but it is going to happen. What is more important...is developing a personal philosophy that you live by that guides you to become the person you want to be and live by that. Create a set of beliefs, that create an identity you wish to express in your life.

 


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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@ThePoint  Leo literally has a video about it

 

1 hour ago, ThePoint said:

I keep compulsively texting and chatting with some people even though I don't care about them.

I don't even see myself talking to these people in a year from now, I just still talk to them because we are in the same school.

But I can't stop talking to them and texting them. Every time we get in a conversation via messages I compulsively respond even though I should be doing other things. This is because I care about what they think of me. 

Throw the mask away and dump them. You'll feel alot better not having to carry the charade on.
Also you will realize that it wont be as bed as you think, because chanses are that them as well are faking it and they'll never reach for you again after some time.

 

29 minutes ago, ThePoint said:

Leo said in his The Power of Letting Go video that neuroticism is holding on and clinging to something without being able to let it go. That is exactly me. I am being neurotic in that I can't let go of what I am holding on and clinging to. Why can't I just let it go? I know logically that it is not serving me but I still can't let it go. 

You are basically holding to a fake persona.
Shift from:  what you think others axpect you to behave------------> to how you you acually want to behave
Eventually you'll fing friend you actualli connect with.

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58 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

Hello..... ummm I don't know if you know this....ADHD has never been scientifically proven.

Actually, it a diagnosable disorder that involves professionals prescribing medications, diet and lifestyle adjustments to help improve the symptoms.

It is a scientifically proven, neurobiological disorder. Don't go around telling people it isn't, it literally stops people from being able to function properly, which is why it is a genuine disorder.

I'm sorry but you need to know what you're talking about before telling people stuff like this.

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You may not be able to completely stop caring, but what helps is how much satisfaction in life you can create for yourself, and this may help you value what other people think less and less as you realise you need their approval less.

Challenge why you think what they have to say is so important.

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