People Pleaser, Inner Image And External Standards

[Donald]

 Beginning with childhood have been taught that the highest prize in the world is the approval of others.We are obedient to please our parents.We are studious and well behaved in order to please our teachers. When we try to get our own way we are told we are being selfish and bad. Somehow the ideas of good and bad get tangled up in our minds with the need to gain the approval of others. 

Later in life when we experiment with "selfishness" we experience a sort of bad feelings, we feel guilty. This is not how "nice"people behave. Nice people aren't supposed to be selfish too often. 

We often allow others to treat us unfairly because we do not want to confront or challenge them, nor do we want to disturb our ingrained notions of right and wrong. Instead, we conform ourselves with feelings of moral superiority. We tell ourselves we are above conflict over unimportant trifles. But despite what we think, we turn the other cheek. Not because is right, but because it is easy. 

Extract from Thick Face Black Heart 

[Alicja_]

It's so hard to eradicate these. These beliefs, these systems, injected to the bloodstream, feeding our subconscious from early childhood till now. Yet, it seems necessary to raise above this dependency and comfort, face fear, and create a life of our own. Not the copy of the copy of the copy. 

Laborious and frightening process, then why bother, eh? Let's go back to sleep and think about it tommorow after tommorow after tommorow. 

[Donald]

@Alicja_ Growth requires emotional labor, what we are doing here with self development is one of the most difficult things to do. Especially when everyone around you is doing the exact opposite. In our day to day life we do not have "models" of people who have conquered themselves. 

[Christian]

I think you are  right here. It certainly is true that we are programmed to believe that what other people think about us matters a lot. I think parenting style has a lot to do with it. Especially the basic carrot and stick model of parenting where parents reward certain behaviours and punish others.

That way we become imprisoned mentally and learn that to be loved we have to live in accordance to certain unwritten rules from a young age where the mind is open to suggestion.  

And we learn that punishment is bad and start to plan how we can fit in to ensure being accepted and loved. The best word I can use to describe it is that it is soul crushing and very limiting to ones potential. 

It is a real battle and you are not the only one struggling with it believe me.

 

[Life Coach]

For me it was very easy to eradicate this shit. It only took me a few of Leos videos back then and also the mgtow red pill philosphy and boom! I was all set. It was like an almost instant enlightenment. I abslutely detest society and programming that is done upon us, brainwashing from early childhood to make us good slaves, good disposible mindless zombies who are weak and pathetic. We people grow up sick and most stay sick till their death

[Donald]

@Old Soul It is not a matter of brainwashing!!! Our parents taught us what they thought was the best. Period. Get over it. It's not that some evil genius wants us to be unconscious, oh no!!! You don't have to be against society as a whole. Don't fall into that trap, you see. Don't feel superior about being just 0.001% more "aware" than other people. 

And watching Leo's videos will not be enough,    even when emotional release happens instantly, you should watch yourself AGAIN AND AGAIN. You may understand Leo on his videos and have like a "oh I knew it" type of moment and feel good about that. Eventually thinking you are growing. Don't want to spoil the surprise but

GROWTH DOES NOT COME WITHOUT EMOTIONAL LABOR!!!! 

Edited February 2, 2017 by Donald

[Life Coach]

1 hour ago, Donald said:

@Old Soul It is not a matter of brainwashing!!! Our parents taught us what they thought was the best. Period. Get over it. It's not that some evil genius wants us to be unconscious, oh no!!! You don't have to be against society as a whole. Don't fall into that trap, you see. Don't feel superior about being just 0.001% more "aware" than other people. 

And watching Leo's videos will not be enough,    even when emotional release happens instantly, you should watch yourself AGAIN AND AGAIN. You may understand Leo on his videos and have like a "oh I knew it" type of moment and feel good about that. Eventually thinking you are growing. Don't want to spoil the surprise but

GROWTH DOES NOT COME WITHOUT EMOTIONAL LABOR!!!! 

Lmao man, it's 100% brainwashing. Yeah your parents probably only had the best for you in mind, but that still doesn't change that they brainwashed you with stupid shit. Because they are themselves brainwashed by society and by their parents and they have never ever heard of self-actualization and stuff of the likes before. But it's not even about your parents, the real danger is about mainstream society and mainstream media. There is 100% hardcore brainwashing going on right there....and not with good intents like with your parents. Society doesn't give a fuck about you, it wants you to be a zombie slave and a weak simp, wasting your time and life with stupid bullshit and being always nice and people pleasing. You are taught to be a 9-5 workslave in school, that's all they teach you. You are taught to fit in, to like what they tell you to like, to chase after women like an idiot, to chase money, to marry and have kids. When you resist they shame you and even attack you. You are brainwashed into fitting in and being a mindless retard drone for society at every corner. It's especially bad for men in todays world, with man hating and feminism on the rise. Mainstream media will teach you how to be a fucking loser, because that's what they want you to be. A disposable slave who works his whole life and pays for women and society.

And just as you thought it couldn't be as bad on this forum, it might be bad even here. You are watching a bald man ranting about stuff and telling you what to do and what to believe every week. Don't tell me this is not brainwashing. This forum suddenly became a 5 meo dmt and drug hellhole just because one man brought it up. So much influence does he have over his people. Before that no one cared. And don't think that he has your best interest in mind, most likely not. You get brainwashed here too, slowly, subtle, but it's everywhere. Altought this might be brainwashing for your own benefit, I don't know. Can't tell. But it's happening. But you can easily opt out of this site and you are safe and free. This doesn't work so easily in society. Like Leo said, society is a huge cult, and you are neck-deep into it already. You are brainwashed way more than you can even imagine. There is no easy escape.

I don't need to get over it, and I don't feel superior over my 0,001% more awareness. I am grateful for even that, for it gives me a huge advantage and makes me see...at least a little clearer. And this 0,001% already makes a fucking huge difference.