How do we decide what actions to take in life?

[Someone here]

When we make a choice about something significant we are basically choosing our  values. where should a person look for their values. Is it all reason, is it emotion.? How do we choose what philosophy of life to subscribe to and even if none. How do we make our choices?  

I guess our choices depend alot on what we believe. I don't believe in much so it's hard for me to make choices. I like to believe in moral truths that are eternal. But sometimes I doubt that. Same as God. I want to believe in god but then I doubt. For me wether there's a god or not would make a big difference in how I make my choices. But I doubt everything at times and wonder if we are just floating through space aimlessly and without a purpose. If the universe is cold and doesn't care then I'm gonna make much different desicions then if their was an all loving god. I would like to hear how others make their desicions because I'm lost.

[SeaMonster]

You could look back on your past (even if you're young) and see which decisions worked for you and which didn't.  Then you can extract some kind of general principle regarding which course you're here to follow.

E.g. for me being more independent and self-reliant works and depending on others doesn't.  And some people are the opposite, they're better off with a partner. For some people being more spiritual works, for others more materialistic.

It might help you if you write out a story of your life and what/when things have worked well and when not.

Edited May 22, 2022 by SeaMonster

[puporing]

Something like filling your Maslow's hierarchy of needs and then you are well-positioned to radiate love/truth/goodness.

[puporing]

Well this was well-timed to your question... 

 

[RobertZ]

Sometimes a person does what they don’t want to do, or does not do what they want to do. So, our actions define our values but sometimes there is a dissonance between personalities or perspectives inside of a person: ‘Part of me thinks this, but another part thinks that.’

 

One medieval western view on values was looking for an intersection between reason and emotions—or “passions,” as some people called them. For example, a person could be very rational and avoiding extremes in their actions without passionately desiring balance. A person might act continently without internalizing virtue. 

 

Nevertheless, some of these thinkers emphasized reason and distinctions, in defining values, in a very conclusive style and without much observation or openness to cultural differences, for example. They would make a bald assertion like, ‘sex outside of an [i.e., monogamous] marriage is irrational because it fails to accord with the fully self-giving nature of the act,’ and leave the matter at that. Sure, that argument seems rational—but the claim of un-naturalness seems to include some circular reasoning. 

 

So ‘part of me’ (i.e., an act of my intellect) decides to believe authoritative doctrines and arguments (or perhaps they are post hoc justifications of unwillingness to “let” others enjoy their lives) but ‘part of me’ remains unsatisfied with whole-hearted adherence to guidance. 

 

Time is a big factor in values. Running out of time to experience a pleasure, for example, could lead a person into a situation where they are more likely to do one thing rather than another. 

 

Turning to more mundane examples, a person’s environment also shapes their values. For example, one person might like watching sports and not particularly care for blue cheese. Another person might find sports basically uninteresting, but claim she lives blue cheese. Perhaps these people had different social contexts for exposure—the sports fan had early friends through sports, and they had a lot of fun with people watching sports. Now they love watching sports! Similarly, perhaps the cheese lover first tasted blue cheese at a blue cheese tasting with a group of admirable people, and now the person loves blue cheese. However, the ongoing practice of watching sports might expose a person to certain friends and conversations—plus the cultic repetition of certain songs at sports games—and all these things may influence a persons values to greater or lesser degrees. 

 

I tend to think that socialization and environmental factors in a person’s exposure to activities and attitudes has a significant effect on a person’s activities and values, so I am a bit of a cultural relativist in that regard. 

 

I don’t know if beliefs make choices easier. I think that beliefs can provide certain motivations of diligence and consistence—come hell or high water. And there is a lot to be said for the concept of habit. Habits can create an inner space for freedom of mind, creativity, and extreme satisfaction. For example, the habit of exercise can give a person time to think about things and contextualize them, as well as develop in achievement. 

 

The interiorization of values seems to be a different story, when it comes to beliefs. That interiorization pertains more to emotion than reason. A person can believe in certain values and live these values out (more or less hypocritically) and yet feel unsatisfied, resentful, bitter, regretful, envious, judgmental, and self-judgmental. Certain fundamental attitudes like compassion for others seem to require a  high degree of flexibility in beliefs, to say the least. 

 

That is about the end of my musing for now. 

 

Though, isn’t it strange that God’s existence does not seem to be self evident? I mean sure—God’s existence is self-evident but we observe recurring doubts in people’s beliefs. I suppose that even proclaimed atheists might sometimes doubt their belief that God does not exist. I just think it’s interesting that God should create such a perspective that His existence should not be observed.

[Rokazulu]

Moral truths are clearly not eternal.
But, the compassion to express them, definitely is.

It is only if you want a better life for humanity, you would consider the implications of every action.
This body will pass on, there is nothing to gain in virtue signaling.
But, the endeavor for more compassion is what will remain, and is what will remove all our struggle.

[Leo Gura]

LP Course guides you through finding your top 10 values.

[JonasVE12]

Dude, you are just in apathy. It is so obvious. Your heavy thinking is a strategy of your subconscious mind to reclaim that connection to that natural intuition and flow that you naturally possess when you connect with the body more.

you remove all that repressed energy from your consciousness that is hindering that natural connection and then life flows through you naturally when you let go of the internal blocks. Wisdom, intuition, meaning all is so effortless when you connect with your inner world more deeply, and not on the level of thoughts, but feeling. 

This kind of contemplation isn't curiosity, it is apathy. 
How is your relationship with the world? What experiences do you want to have in your life? How is your experience with women, dating? Do you have any friends or any social life at all? How much fear, shame and guilt do you have? 

What else do you want to achieve but feel distanced from? Play around outside of your body in your imagination and feel what it is like to have joy and freedom, and then relate that to now. Inside your imagination is what your goal is. There is clarity. Then the now is always framed in relation to your imagination. To your deep desires. If you push down your desire and lust because that triggers other painful emotion, and then you are repressing the desire itself, then you will move down to apathy, be lost, have no clarity, no meaning, and the mind becomes super heavy with thought. But it is all nonsense. 

Resolve your repressed energy and you will naturally find all the answers to your questions. 

This is so so obvious. It's all interconnected man. 

[Someone here]

33 minutes ago, JonasVE12 said:

How is your relationship with the world? What experiences do you want to have in your life? How is your experience with women, dating? Do you have any friends or any social life at all? How much fear, shame and guilt do you have? 

My relationship with the world is based on the unknown. I don't fully understand the world. Which in return give me fear .

I want to achieve so many great things .I currently  am producing music and working on a content of a YouTube channel (I'm not gonna share my YouTube channel here, ).  But I have few audience so I can't build a career around that. I study philosophy in university. Again I can't make a good career with a philosophy degree .

I don't have much experience with women .only experience is a quick blowjob from hooker here in Thailand.  Besides that I always fail in trying to approach women .

I have few friends online. And a few friends in real life .

I experienced a great shame and guilt from my past but I'm in the process of recovering. 

[Someone here]

2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

LP Course guides you through finding your top 10 values.

I'm looking forward to your awakening new course. Maybe it will motivate me to buy your life purpose course. I'm willing to pay for both.

BTW how is the new course going ?are you working on it lately?  I'm very excited about it. I hope it gets released soon ?. 

Edited May 22, 2022 by Someone here

[Someone here]

13 hours ago, puporing said:

Something like filling your Maslow's hierarchy of needs and then you are well-positioned to radiate love/truth/goodness.

 The major problem with Maslow's hierarchy-of-needs theory is that it cannot be tested empirically – there is no way to measure precisely how satisfied one level of need must be before the next higher need becomes operative.

[zurew]

1 minute ago, Someone here said:

The major problem with Maslow's hierarchy-of-needs theory is that it cannot be tested empirically – there is no way to measure precisely how satisfied one level of need must be before the next higher need becomes operative.

It could be though. With enough statistical data, but that statistical data would have to be collected first. Maslow's hierarchy of needs is sort of tangible, you could make some hypothesis about the levels and then test your theory if it applies or not. Even if we are not able to make a perfect hypothesis about it, we can at least point to a range of things that is required to achieve certain levels.