Panicking about graduating college

[soos_mite_ah]

So I'm going to graduate college in December and I'm going to be applying to jobs during this summer. There is a huge part of me that is panicking becaue I don't know if I will be able to afford basic necessities and if I can move out of my parent's house even if I get a decent job. Everything is getting more and more expensive. 

Also, I'm not sure if I can get a job that I will even like. I'm not expecting my job to be this all grand life purpose that is going to fulfill all of my dreams and make me feel fulfilled in my life. I'm a big believer on finding fulfillment in other areas of my life instead of labor. I just want something that I can tolerate and that will help me have peace of mind and financial stability. I don't want to work upwards of 60-80 hours of week (I'm mentioning this because a lot of people who graduate from the program I'm in go on to work in things like investment banking and consulting that pay well but also work you to the bone to where you are burnt out and have no life). I've been stressed and/or burnt out for years at this point and sometimes it feels like there isn't an end in sight. I've always either been stressed out with school or I've been stressed out with my home environment and I can't really remember a time when my life wasn't like this. I don't want to keep living like this. 

And I don't think living with my parents for a few years to save money is an option unless I'm willing to crack my sanity like a glow stick like I did like a year ago which landed me into grippy socks jail for a few days and took me out of college for a couple of semesters. That's another thing, I know that I'm planning on cutting my parents off once I get a job and get on my feet but not having that financial support is freaking me out to where I am tempted to keep them in my life despite the shit they put me through. And I know it doesn't help to think about the past but sometimes I catch my mind drifting into the reality that my dad faced when he first immigrated to the U.S. where he was able to support himself, graduate college debt free, and have a decent amount of savings on MINIMUM WAGE. Meanwhile I'm here wondering if my potential job in corporate America will let me pay the bills. I stg if this was the 80s or some shit I would have moved out of my house in a heart beat once I turned 18 and cut them off without a second thought. 

I also sometimes feel like I don't have much to look forward to as it will be likely that I'm not going to be able to afford to have a family when I get older given how wages are stagnating and how I don't want to raise a child in poverty and I mean.... owning a home is a fucking fantasy at this point. I'm not really looking to settle down immediately after college so this is something that is kind of in the back of my mind, but it isn't the most pressing issue imo. But just knowing I would have that kind of option would have been nice. Also, rising rent prices is freaking me out since I always wanted to move out of Dallas and go else where into a larger city. I didn't do that because of college and I technically didn't have the option to because I didn't want to get into student loan debt by going somewhere out of state. It's like all of my goals in life have to be comprimised because of affordability and while I'm okay with things taking time and facing delays, again, it feels like there isn't an end in sight because of how shit is going. 

TLDR: I have 99 problems and having a fuck ton of money livable wage under good working conditions would probably solve like 80 of them. 

[Tristan12]

55 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

I know that I'm planning on cutting my parents off once I get a job and get on my feet but not having that financial support is freaking me out to where I am tempted to keep them in my life despite the shit they put me through.

56 minutes ago, soos_mite_ah said:

I stg if this was the 80s or some shit I would have moved out of my house in a heart beat once I turned 18 and cut them off without a second thought.

I can totally relate

I'm in a pretty similar situation myself. For me i've just made the choice to put up with living at home and just working as much as I can to build a career until I can support myself financially. For me its just a better option than having to slave away at some mindless job to be able to barely cover living expenses, and not having much time to work on my passions. I've manage to sort of distance myself from my family to the extent where I barely talk to them and I just isolate myself as much as I can, and they don't bother me so much now. I still can't wait to move out though.

I don't really know what to tell you, this is just genuinely a shitty situation to be in. Hopefully you end up getting a job you like, but if not I guess you'll just have to decide if you want to settle with a job you don't like for a while to be able to live alone, or if you want to live with your parents.

You could try to look for some alternative way out like maybe living with friends to lower living expenses, or maybe you could really put your mind to it and come up with some way to land a job that you really like and is perfect for you, but if not then I feel like you'll just have to bite the bullet of a difficult situation and make the most of it, whatever you end up doing.

I'm sure long term it will work out, if you're worried about money still being an issue for you later in life, then that's something you can work towards and set goals for, just like any other area of personal development. Start learning about finance and investing and figure out what you can do to make more money for yourself if a job won't be enough for you.

[soos_mite_ah]

16 hours ago, Tristan12 said:

I'm in a pretty similar situation myself. For me i've just made the choice to put up with living at home and just working as much as I can to build a career until I can support myself financially. For me its just a better option than having to slave away at some mindless job to be able to barely cover living expenses, and not having much time to work on my passions.

I really feel like I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. Part of me feels that if I had a healthy family that just sucking up the next few years to save up money from whatever job I get (whether it is something enjoy or not) would be the route that I would take. Again, I'm not opposed to things taking time and facing delays, but in my case particularly, my home life isn't good for this kind of move.

On the flipside even if I had a bad home life, if economically things were more stable and there were more laws regarding working conditions, I think in my head there would be a way out of my home life that I wouldn't be freaking out about.  I think it's the combination of a bad home life and a fucked up economy that is weighing on me whereas if it was an either or kind of situation, I wouldn't be as pressed. 

16 hours ago, Tristan12 said:

I've manage to sort of distance myself from my family to the extent where I barely talk to them and I just isolate myself as much as I can, and they don't bother me so much now. I still can't wait to move out though.

I pretty much lock myself in my room whenever I'm back home. It's kind of depressing but it's bareable and it's much better than the alternative. Or I try to come up with excuses to stay outside of the house by working or being with friends so that I would encounter my parents less. Currently I'm doing an internship I don't particularly like so that I can stay away from my parents even though I'm burnt out. 

16 hours ago, Tristan12 said:

You could try to look for some alternative way out like maybe living with friends to lower living expenses, or maybe you could really put your mind to it and come up with some way to land a job that you really like and is perfect for you, but if not then I feel like you'll just have to bite the bullet of a difficult situation and make the most of it, whatever you end up doing.

Yeah... that's another thing, I don't know how the hell I'm supposed to figure out a roommate situation if I do plan to move out of my area after college. The logistics of moving if that is what I choose to do is a whole nother stressor tbh but I'm planning on not focussing on that since this is pretty much a hypothetical at this moment. 

[LastThursday]

@soos_mite_ah the panic is real, but things will iron themselves out in the longer run. It's a new phase of life. I knew whatever I did I could not to go back to my parents after college. I cleaned houses part time as a stop gap. I then refurbished office telephones. And finally I got my first proper job after a year - after which I stopped panicking. I had to live very frugally, but at least I was free all that time!

If you have a big laundry list of worries, a lot of those worries can be deferred - having a family can wait until much later for example - the economy and your financial situation will have improved by then. Just prioritise things and concentrate on the more urgent things first. Maybe try and sus out if anyone is prepared to be your roommate, or even just advertise for it. If you have a side hustle you can make some money from in the interim, then work it out (I know you're an excellent writer e.g.) - heck or even just approach companies in your area directly and show them what you're good at. As for moving out of town it's a PITA, but it's just a short time of inconvenience and finite cost.

 

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I5L2otW4r8

[Husseinisdoingfine]

[SeaMonster]

Thinking too much, with too many pointless negative, pessimistic thoughts can be a bigger problem than the current state of the world or your life.  You're likely quite smart, it's just that your head is filled with too much shit.

[soos_mite_ah]

On 5/18/2022 at 8:56 PM, SeaMonster said:

Thinking too much, with too many pointless negative, pessimistic thoughts can be a bigger problem than the current state of the world or your life.  You're likely quite smart, it's just that your head is filled with too much shit.

Did you even read the post or replies lol? 

On 5/18/2022 at 3:57 AM, LastThursday said:

the panic is real, but things will iron themselves out in the longer run. It's a new phase of life.

I try to remind myself that and honestly, thank you, I needed that. I remember I had a similar kind of panic wash over me when I was applying to colleges because, again, new phase of life and more responsibilities. And things turned out ok despite the financial bullshit that was thrown at me over the last few years especially with the pandemic. 

On 5/18/2022 at 8:26 PM, Husseinisdoingfine said:

LMAOOO mood.