Why most porn is fake and boring ?

[something_else]

18 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@thisintegrated what is sex to you?  How should it be done ? Robotic and mechanic like in most porn or filled with intimacy and hugs and kissing and touching each other?

I mean ideally it’s both, there’s a mechanical and an emotional component to good sex

[Someone here]

10 minutes ago, something_else said:

I mean ideally it’s both, there’s a mechanical and an emotional component to good sex

The problem is that porn is responsible for viewing sex as a mechanical process. 

Come on dude ..do you actually want to have sex like what you see in porn? Where the woman just rides your dick without seeing each others face ..? And with exaggerated noises and fake moans ?

Edited May 13, 2022 by Someone here

[something_else]

40 minutes ago, Someone here said:

The problem is that porn is responsible for viewing sex as a mechanical process. 

Come on dude ..do you actually want to have sex like what you see in porn? Where the woman just rides your dick without seeing each others face ..? And with exaggerated noises and fake moans ?

As I said, there’s a mechanical and emotional component to sex

Good sex needs both

[Someone here]

@something_else may I ask you did you have sex before? 

[Roy]

Yea I realized from a young age that most porn really sucks and isn't very realistic. Even during the first time I ever watched porn at 11 years old, way before I ever had sex myself I had an intuition, "this can't really be what sex is like right?" The some years later I confirmed it for myself.

While women are put on pedestals and the core thing that drives the sex industry, it's still essentially dominated by men and because it's a business it needs to make money. Most of the customers are low consciousness men, so the majority of the product is going to be tailored to what they want. Which is why most porn is male-centric, fake, and just unrealistic fantasies. It's a reflection of our misogynistic culture really. It's slowly starting to change in a healthier direction with consent being a bigger topic within the industry, but there is a long way to go.

Personally I don't watch porn videos. I can't take it seriously because of how fake and unrealistic it is. It destroys the immersion. For the past 15 years I've basically only been using pictures. I just find galleries of models I like and then use my imagination. It also saves a ton of time. I'm not watching a 36 minute video with horrible acting and some poor girl pretending to orgasm .

[Someone here]

34 minutes ago, Roy said:

Yea I realized from a young age that most porn really sucks and isn't very realistic. Even during the first time I ever watched porn at 11 years old, way before I ever had sex myself I had an intuition, "this can't really be what sex is like right?" The some years later I confirmed it for myself.

While women are put on pedestals and the core thing that drives the sex industry, it's still essentially dominated by men and because it's a business it needs to make money. Most of the customers are low consciousness men, so the majority of the product is going to be tailored to what they want. Which is why most porn is male-centric, fake, and just unrealistic fantasies. It's a reflection of our misogynistic culture really. It's slowly starting to change in a healthier direction with consent being a bigger topic within the industry, but there is a long way to go.

Personally I don't watch porn videos. I can't take it seriously because of how fake and unrealistic it is. It destroys the immersion. For the past 15 years I've basically only been using pictures. I just find galleries of models I like and then use my imagination. It also saves a ton of time. I'm not watching a 36 minute video with horrible acting and some poor girl pretending to orgasm .

Yes .agreed. 

Sex is meant to be an act between two married people who love and care about each other. The sex that occurs in porn films is loveless and emotionless. It takes all the feelings that are normally associated with sex- caring, affection, tenderness- and turns them on their head. They are replaced by anger, selfishness, hate, fear, and disgust. By changing the emotions associated with sex, it changes how sex was designed by God. From these feelings of anger and hate, men are shown that it’s okay to treat women in a degrading way, which is untrue. 

[Roy]

8 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Sex is meant to be an act between two married people

lol you lost me.

[Someone here]

@Roy why do you think all religions prohibited sex outside of marriage? 

You don't wanna end up having sex with whoever the fuck you want,.you risk catching STDs

[Roy]

17 minutes ago, Someone here said:

why do you think all religions prohibited sex outside of marriage?

There is nothing special about religion, they are archaic mind viruses that naturally arose from evolution to keep simple minded people under control so birth rates and society remained relatively stable, and to keep us reverting to our natural animalistic and chaotic state (which is to simply rape the mates we desire and kill our competitors). It's no longer helpful in the modern pluralistic world. Unless you live in an underdeveloped stage blue or lower society, then it's probably still relevant and necessary yes.

17 minutes ago, Someone here said:

You don't wanna end up having sex with whoever the fuck you want,.you risk catching STDs

Of course you do. Stop lying to yourself.

[puporing]

22 minutes ago, Someone here said:

You don't wanna end up having sex with whoever the fuck you want,.you risk catching STDs

There're lots you can do to prevent it as much as you can.

Ask questions/communicate, don't rush into it with strangers, use protection, vaccinate against the ones there're vaccines for, do testing semi-regularly. 

[something_else]

13 hours ago, Someone here said:

@something_else may I ask you did you have sex before? 

I’ve had my fair share of sexual experiences

Purely mechanical sex can still be stimulating, but emotional, lovey-dovey sex without good mechanics is always awful

It doesn’t matter how much you love a girl, if you cum in 15 seconds, or don’t hit the right spots, the sex isn’t gonna be good

[Someone here]

@Roy @something_else

I would still go with intimate sex rather than mechanical one.  The problem is porn twists our perception of how sex should be done and what turns women on.

Men may turn on like a light, but for women, arousal doesn’t happen so fast, 

Pave the way during the day by hugging, kissing, and holding hands. Have some fun together, and show you appreciate her.

Feeling safe and secure in the relationship is key for a woman to really let loose during sex. A long hug can go further than you’d think. Hugging for 30 seconds stimulates oxytocin, the hormone in women that creates sense of connection and trust.

 

It helps to know what kind of turn-on your partner likes, whether it’s oral, visual, or mental,  Does your partner like it when you talk dirty over the phone or text? Trace your finger slowly up her chest? Flirt with her at a bar?

Also, if you like what you see, say so Let a woman know how desirable she is.

[something_else]

3 hours ago, Someone here said:

@Roy @something_else

I would still go with intimate sex rather than mechanical one.  The problem is porn twists our perception of how sex should be done and what turns women on.

Men may turn on like a light, but for women, arousal doesn’t happen so fast, 

Pave the way during the day by hugging, kissing, and holding hands. Have some fun together, and show you appreciate her.

Feeling safe and secure in the relationship is key for a woman to really let loose during sex. A long hug can go further than you’d think. Hugging for 30 seconds stimulates oxytocin, the hormone in women that creates sense of connection and trust.

 

It helps to know what kind of turn-on your partner likes, whether it’s oral, visual, or mental,  Does your partner like it when you talk dirty over the phone or text? Trace your finger slowly up her chest? Flirt with her at a bar?

Also, if you like what you see, say so Let a woman know how desirable she is.

I agree with you, but your thinking is too black and white. You're talking like there are only two options: mechanical sex or intimate sex. Why not just get good at both?

That's what good sex is, the blending of two people's psyche and bodies into one. There is a mental and a physical component and you need both

Edited May 14, 2022 by something_else

[Someone here]

21 hours ago, something_else said:

I agree with you, but your thinking is too black and white. You're talking like there are only two options: mechanical sex or intimate sex. Why not just get good at both?

That's what good sex is, the blending of two people's psyche and bodies into one. There is a mental and a physical component and you need both

Why is mechanical sex important? 

How do you have sex personally?  Do you just focus on the penetration or do you flirt first and give enough space for foreplay?  

[something_else]

2 hours ago, Someone here said:

Why is mechanical sex important? 

How do you have sex personally?  Do you just focus on the penetration or do you flirt first and give enough space for foreplay?  

Sorry, I wasn’t that clear. I wasn’t trying to say mechanical sex was important, I was saying that the mechanics of sex are important

Of course you flirt first and have space for foreplay, both of those are super important

But so are the actual mechanics of penetration

[Someone here]

1 hour ago, something_else said:

Sorry, I wasn’t that clear. I wasn’t trying to say mechanical sex was important, I was saying that the mechanics of sex are important

Of course you flirt first and have space for foreplay, both of those are super important

But so are the actual mechanics of penetration

For me the penetration is the last thing that turns me on.  Having a blowjob makes more sexually excited than fucking.  Am i abnormal?  Maybe. But I do find 90 %, of porm boring ,mechanical and unrealistic. 

[Carl-Richard]

I used to think like this, but recently I found out I really like femdom  

[Omni]

On 5/13/2022 at 3:28 PM, Someone here said:

@thisintegrated what is sex to you?  How should it be done ? Robotic and mechanic like in most porn or filled with intimacy and hugs and kissing and touching each other?

If I’m understanding your confusion about this topic correctly, what you’re looking for is something you have to create in the moment yourself, obvious healthy boundaries and communication with whomever youre with is necessary but I think the problem is expectation on the result of the situation.

You might not have or find a sexually compatible partner - sometimes one cannot meet the others needs and that’s just how it is sometimes, but honest open dialogues about your relationships can sometimes solve this problem in new ways.

[Danioover9000]

@Someone here

On 5/13/2022 at 6:42 PM, Someone here said:

I hope this topic is not too controversial lol

Let's be honest...... It's near impossible for a guy to stop scratching his dick or looking into hot stuff online every now and then .. Sex is a natural desire like food and water.  But one should be mindful in using it because it can easily turn into addiction or a substitute for the real thing. I still from time to time feel an urge to go solo . But .. Most porn is actually fake robotic boring sex that has nothing to do with real sex lol..  Real sex =intimacy and playfulness not just in and out robotic exercises .. I wanna touch my girl.. Smell her.. Feel her..etc.  Recently I discovered a audio porn site that is focused more on intimate sex.. Not going into details but it focuses more on the intimacy part and the foreplay.. I thought wow that's really what I'm looking for.. Then I wonder why most porn companies don't produce scenes that are actually real-like instead of this fake boring shit lol?????? 

also men want intimate sex.  My point is what I see in let's say 70 % of porn has nothing to do with what real sex is about.. I mean ofcourse it's sex and all  but I mean I don't want to just insert my penis in a vagina while staring at the wall and the woman is staring at the window or something..  wtf is that l?

Given that the content is almost endless.. It's a shame that you have to spend  some time searching fot something that actually grabs your attention.. At least that's how it is for me .

   It'll depend on what value systems, cognitive and moral development, personality types, states of consciousness, ego development, and other lines of development and general/specific life experiences with pornography, from an individual level, to a societal level. To me, pornography has served a function in society, to further domesticate most males into lesser energy levels and well being such that creativity is better controlled and managed by existing social structures, by design, because too much creativity can and does destroy parts if not entire societies. It's extremely foolish to think that we can ban all of pornography, just like we tried with the alcohol prohibition.

   For example, you can say that most men masturbate and ejaculate to pornographic material 3-5 times, or daily a week. However, Some men can masturbate multiple times a day, sometimes 5 if not 10 times, and some can tolerate only 3-1 times a week or every 2 weeks. Why do we see this bell curve in sexual output? Because it depends on those men's genetic makeup, body composition, health, nutrition, sleep, and other systems like the endocrine system, immune system and nervous system. Age, attraction, sexuality, sexual orientation, can also be a factor.

[SgtPepper]

People act different on camera and it's all about perspective/shots. It's cold and disconnected for viewers.

the only way to have the experience intimate sex is to have it yourself. Sex can be sacred and romantic... you get what you put in. 

Edited May 19, 2022 by SgtPepper