A club with a popular, trendy vibe

[something_else]

This is kind of an a abstract question and more me just rambling at 3am

But anyway, there’s a club I want to go to in my city, it’s one of the most popular, usually a very long queue

It has a very trendy, cool-kid vibe. I usually go to relaxed clubs that are basically a melting pot of everyone, mainly students (I’m recently graduated), so this one is a little bit different

I can’t shake the idea that it’s filled with the type of cool kids who I felt inferior to in school 

But I know that the reality is I’m so much more socially capable than I was in school now, and I’m as physically attractive as any of them. I’m also doing really well in terms of career now too

There’s no logical reason for me to be scared of the place, yet somehow I really really am

I feel like they’ll immediately spot me as an imposter

I feel like if I wear the clothes they wear then I won’t pull them off, and if I wear my own clothes then I’ll stand out for not fitting in 

One thing is that I still don’t have my fashion down as much as I’d like and that seems to be a big deal for these kinds of places. I think that’s a big part of the fear

I suppose I’m asking if this experience resonates with anyone? And if you have any advice for getting over it? I think fundamentally it’s rooted in some trauma of being kind of a ‘do my own thing’ person in school and never really fitting in

Anyway, I’m going to the place this Friday, assuming I don’t get kicked back by the bouncers, appreciate any advice  

[Leo Gura]

Go there dressed down. You need to decouple your confidence from your clothing. It shouldn't make a difference to your state how you're dressed. You can approach girls in flip-flops with white socks and a dirty old t-shirt. As long as the bouncer lets you in the club.

[something_else]

3 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Go there dressed down. You need to decouple your confidence from your clothing. It shouldn't make a difference to your state how you're dressed. You can approach girls in flip-flops with white socks and a dirty old t-shirt. As long as the bouncer lets you in the club.

I think I’ll go with very simple casual-ish clothes then, nothing flashy

The bouncers are supposed to be assholes so I don’t wanna push it too much