5 Meo Dmt Gone Terribly Wrong?

[ari]

After my first (and only so far) 5 meo dmt session I can't really remember that much, but what I remember was a feeling of great struggle. Afterwards the experienced guide told that I had told him with a firm and calm tone of voice that he was a fake, that he wasn't a guru. He told me that I had said that I am the real guru. All this followed by a lot of cursing, this time with not so calm tone of voice. He also told me that he tried to get me out of the "situation" that I seemed to be trapped in by hushing me and telling me to be quite, but I had apparently told him "who the f*** are you to hush me?". As I wrote earlier, I do not have any memory about saying all these words and I am surprised that I uttered these words to him since I traveled through three countries in order to meet him. I wonder if someone out there knows what happened to me, why did I react in that way? Thank you in advance!

[Visionary]

I really wouldn't know the cause of this, but beware of developing a spiritual ego. Subconsciously a lot of us use spirituality to be 'one up'. To be better than the rest. To tell them what life really is all about so you can feel better about yourself. I'm aware i'm doing this myself. The ego is very tricky. You really have to introspect so the intentions will surface.

But of course, this might not be the case for you. I have years of experience of psychedelics. But no 5 Meo. Don't know the effects.

[outlandish]

If you can't remember what happened, you've had a blackout, which means that you took too much, a psychedelic over dose. It's a good idea to follow Leo and others' advice to work your way up in dose slowly over a series of sessions, to learn how you react to 5-MeO-DMT (or with any psychedelic really).

Personally, I'm not a big fan of seeking gurus for this kind of work, in a way I think your outlash had some truth to it, because you are your own guru. It's too bad it came out nasty and you had to travel through 3 countries to get there. Hopefully you guys had a laugh about it after it was all over.

I think Visionary's cautionary note is really insightful, and important for all of us to be aware of!

 

[Leo Gura]

@ari Sounds like you smoked a bunch of it, and it was way too much way too fast for you.

[Neo]

This doesn't really count as hard core experience but I've said some interesting things to nurses under "pre-med" and to one junior doctore who said, "I'm your surgeon for today", I replied "OH NO."

 

[Barna]

According to Martin Ball, when you are on 5-MeO, it's really easy to see if you are still in your ego, or not.

Ask your guru, if your body was in a symmetrical position when you said that. If your body was not symmetric when you said that, then it was only your ego on drugs.

However, if your body was symmetric, then, my friend, what has spoken from you was God (Infinity, Source) itself.  And then you were right, your guru was not enlightened, and nobody has the right to hush God.  It maybe seems a little bit far fetched, that God can speak from you, but after a few trips, you will remember what you were (and are right now), which is Infinity/God itself.

I just finished reading "Being Infinite" by Martin Ball. Try it, maybe it helps you to understand the experience. 

[jse]

Plot twist:

@ari 's "guru" was... Martin Ball.

[Arman]

Haven't tried 5meo but my personal experience with n-n-dmt has been that it can sometimes trigger a kind of waking dream-state. I don't know why, but suddenly it's like the mind releases from its waking-state functionality and enters a mode more akin to what it's like when we're dreaming - namely, reality seems less convincing and the emotional neurosis become automatic behaviors, the same way they are in dreams. Kind of how like in a dream you can find yourself in an argument, or having sex, and it is not necessary for the mind to know how you got there or connect any dots - it just expresses whatever emotion is in flux. It's an odd state to interact with someone in because in some senses they seem very coherent and lucid, but they are not 'themselves' (they are kind of not at the wheel, so to speak) and behavior can become erratic. This may also explain why you can't really remember it, since it's really hard to hold onto what happens in the dream-state. 

Whatever the case may be, I'd offer a sincere apology to your guide. Of course it wasn't your fault and as a guide you have to be prepared for these things; still, it can be really unpleasant and a small gesture can will diffuse that. 

Edited January 31, 2017 by Arman