Acting with integrity is leaving me thirsty

[kamwalker]

5 hours ago, Hardkill said:

Then, why did many tyrannical rulers like Joseph Stalin, Henry VII, and Putin and corrupt high ranking religious leaders like Pope Alexander VI live very long lives for their time without ever suffering from any serious consequences?

 

 

 

They could have been suffering immensely internally. A lot of people are even if it looks like they have everything in the material world. I know I wouldn't trade inner peace for tons of money, sex, and luxuries. 

[somegirl]

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

No, I’m not suggesting that. What I’m saying is that me and everyone who feels the way I do should stop feeling shame about their sexual nature.

Of course. Why would you feel ashamed of your sexual nature? Noone is telling you to be ashamed by that, it's even encouraged for guys, moreso than girls.

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

Stop listening to women and the media as well, since they’re talking from the place of being a victim, so you’re bound to get even more repressed. They’ll tell you approaching is bad, wanting sex is bad, taking the lead is bad…

Well... I don't know what info sources you consume, but you should ignore such media and people that suggest "approaching is bad" "sex is bad" etc. Cause it's not true at all lol. 

Maybe those are your limiting beliefs you adopted from god knows where. And therefore you label those things as "bad", subconsciously, and also subconsciously pushing it away from you. 

I actually find it extremely attracting when I guy embraces those things you said above, take the lead etc... That's what a man is supposed to do, in my opinion.

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

Wouldn’t really fulfill me, but if the only 2 options were die alone and a virgin or be a fuckboy I’d take the latter. But again, what I said above is what I really think is the best course of action.

Luckily the world is not so black and white and you don't have to choose between those two options.

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

But you still let your guard down for him very innocently

What did I do to make you believe "I let my guard down"? 

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

He most likely is a fuckboy because he messaged you (I don’t remember who messaged who first) to meet or whatever (obviously, he has to lead up from somewhere lol), on Instagram, where you can find millions of super hot girls, and he did so based on your pictures alone. Quite the coincidence. 

So what if he messaged me? ?

How is he going to meet someone if he doesn't talk to them beforehand? If we were going to meet in person we would need to talk beforehand, given we don't live in the same town.

And well, I would consider myself attractive. He messaged me probably because he found me interesting too. And I can't judge him that he's messaged me "only because of my looks" because that's everything he can possibly know about me anyway. Instagram is that kind of social media - a bit superficial at first. 

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

Or doesn’t it make more sense that he just wants to fuck, since he doesn’t know you, and therefore wouldn’t make sense that he messaged you because he sees you as relationship potential?

I think he just found me attractive based on the images, and decided to message me. Because that's all he knows about me.

It all starts from looks even in real life, that's the first thing you see. You approach someone because you find them attractive, and then find out how they are as a person after talking to them. 

3 hours ago, michaelcycle00 said:

Added to this is the fact that he didn’t message you back promptly (or at all I guess), so you’re not even on the top of his head.

Well that part is not correct. 

We had that one brief conversation and that was the end of our interaction. He didn't "left me on seen" or anything like that. 

I don't know what his intentions are but it's kinda funny that some people assume that he's not being a serious guy when all he did was be kinda famous and message a girl he found interesting on social app.

Edited May 13, 2022 by somegirl

[michaelcycle00]

9 minutes ago, somegirl said:

Of course. Why would you feel ashamed of your sexual nature. Noone is telling you to be ashamed by that, it's even encouraged for guys, moreso than girls.

True. I guess society dictates it like that. In my case though, I tend to research a lot, about everything, so I always contrast the positive and the negative before I get to a conclusion. Society's expectations don't sway me in that sense. 

 

11 minutes ago, somegirl said:

Well... I don't know what news sources you consume, but you should ignore such media and people that suggest "approaching is bad" "sex is bad" etc. Cause it's not true at all lol. 

Yeah... I've never been one to give news much credit, but since most of the news I read is on Twitter, when I get to the replies and there are like 1000 women saying "you shouldn't approach women on the street because it's creepy and they're just going about their business" I'm gonna think that that's the general consensus. Although to be fair it's mostly Karens or LGBTQ+ people. 

 

12 minutes ago, somegirl said:

Maybe those are your limiting beliefs you adopted from god knows where. And therefore you label those things as "bad", subconsciously, and also subconsciously pushing it away from you. 

 

Deep research on the internet. Social media and forums mostly. Forums are the best because you can see what people really think when no one can judge them in real life. Girls' forums can make a guy extremely insecure let me tell you that much. Never-ending lists of attributes that even the top 1% don't fully match. 

 

15 minutes ago, somegirl said:

I actually find it extremely attracting when I guy embraces those things you said above, take the lead etc... That's what a man is supposed to do, in my opinion.

I agree with this.

 

26 minutes ago, somegirl said:

So what if he messaged me? ?

How is he going to meet someone if he doesn't talk to them beforehand? If we were going to meet in person we would need to talk beforehand, given we don't live in the same town.

And well, I would consider myself attractive. He messaged me probably because he found me interesting too. And I can't judge him that he's messaged me "only because of my looks" because that's everything he can possibly know about me anyway. Instagram is that kind of social media - a bit superficial at first. 

I get that, all I'm saying is that the odds are higher in that he's just trying to sleep around rather than wanting something serious. Even if you're attractive, you also said it yourself, there are many other attractive girls in his comments and following, which is why I asked "are you a supermodel?" inferring that if you were that much more attractive than all those other girls it'd make sense that he'd message you and not any of all the others since Instagram is a bit (more like very) superficial as you said, which is obvious. But yes, there is a chance that you in a particular captivated him among all those others and he wants something serious, it's just statistically not very likely. That's literally all I'm saying.

 

31 minutes ago, somegirl said:

I think he just found me attractive based on the images, and decided to message me. Because that's all he knows about me.

It all starts from looks even in real life, that's the first thing you see. You approach someone because you find them attractive, and then find out how they are as a person after talking to them. 

I know, not sure why you're treating me like some dumb toddler. I thought I'd made my point clear.

 

32 minutes ago, somegirl said:

Well that part is not correct. 

We had that one brief conversation and that was the end of our interaction. He didn't "left me on seen" or anything like that. 

I don't know what his intentions are but it's kinda funny that some people assume that he's not being a serious guy when all he did was be kinda famous and message a girl he found interesting on social app.

Another red flag. I did something similar back in December last year. Matched with a girl on a dating app, but I wasn't attracted to her. I was just swiping right on everyone because I wanted to talk to a girl because I was bored and that's what I felt like doing at the moment. So we had a brief conversation that night, then another in the morning the next day, and that was the end of it. No one left the other on read. It was just a small thing caused by boredom and I never messaged her again. My point stands here. If he wanted you, he would've messaged you again. Trust me, I'm a guy, I know. You're not at the top of his head or seen as important. I think this is obvious for guys and girls alike. Even if he was super busy, if he cared about you he'd make some time to have a chat with you, or at least have the decency to say "hey, it was nice chatting with you, but right now I'm at a point in my life where I'm not able to be in a relationship. When I'm ready I'll make sure to let you know" or similar. I'm still unsure if you aren't contemplating any of these things or just deciding to overlook them (respectfully).

[Ulax]

Hmmm, nice post. I like your vibe dude.

What came to mind was to try a fire drill meditation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_0Hg1GnG1g&t=168s

And, put the girl as the person you want to focus on. Can ignore the bit about choosing someone you have an issue with.

Then journal about what comes up for you. It is a parts based meditation, so myb open your mind to that at first.

--------------------------------

I also thought about yoga nidra as something you might like. Its a very energetic practice, and can get you much more in touch with your sexual energy. It sort of helps your being versus doing attractiveness and connection. Its kinda more stage greeney in terms of dating, sexuality and attraction.

Also, you'll have the best time jerking off of your life if dating doesn't work out ;). Shits wild w/ yoga nidra ?

[somegirl]

1 hour ago, michaelcycle00 said:

I've never been one to give news much credit, but since most of the news I read is on Twitter, when I get to the replies and there are like 1000 women saying "you shouldn't approach women on the street because it's creepy and they're just going about their business" I'm gonna think that that's the general consensus. Although to be fair it's mostly Karens or LGBTQ+ people. 

Oh dear..

You have to select wisely where do you get your infos. Twitter and Reddit are not places where you get good advices. Sad people live there lol.

Every time I posted my relationship problem on Reddit, I got advice that I should break up immediately and how he is such a red flag, worst person ever lol.

People who are truly in a happy and fullfilled relationship where everything works out for them do not write like that. Heck, they are not even on those sites.

1 hour ago, michaelcycle00 said:

Girls' forums can make a guy extremely insecure let me tell you that much. Never-ending lists of attributes that even the top 1% don't fully match. 

Again, you have to choose where you get this infos from and who says them.

Those "I'm too good for you" with never ending list of criteria for guys usually aren't happy individuals and can't manage to get into a healthy relationship ever.

1 hour ago, michaelcycle00 said:

get that, all I'm saying is that the odds are higher in that he's just trying to sleep around rather than wanting something serious.

We'll see.

1 hour ago, michaelcycle00 said:

But yes, there is a chance that you in a particular captivated him among all those others and he wants something serious, it's just statistically not very likely. That's literally all I'm saying.

Yeah, got you.

1 hour ago, michaelcycle00 said:

know, not sure why you're treating me like some dumb toddler. I thought I'd made my point clear.

Sorryyy, not my intention!

1 hour ago, michaelcycle00 said:

My point stands here. If he wanted you, he would've messaged you again. Trust me, I'm a guy, I know. You're not at the top of his head or seen as important. I think this is obvious for guys and girls alike. Even if he was super busy, if he cared about you he'd make some time to have a chat with you, or at least have the decency to say "hey, it was nice chatting with you, but right now I'm at a point in my life where I'm not able to be in a relationship. When I'm ready I'll make sure to let you know" or similar. I'm still unsure if you aren't contemplating any of these things or just deciding to overlook them (respectfully).

I know he's not invested in me at this moment.

I will see how he will behave once we meet each other in real life. If he doesn't message me consistently after that, then all will be understood. 

[Thought Art]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Yes! There is a lot of nuance to jerking off properly.

? shots fired hehe 

[Hello from Russia]

On 5/11/2022 at 1:05 AM, somegirl said:

Wow, this was beautiful to read :')

Can resonate with some of your wishes, you gave me an idea for my wishlist. Thanks.

Want a girn like that too? 

[somegirl]

20 minutes ago, Hello from Russia said:

Want a girn like that too? 

I knew someone would write this... ?

[Hello from Russia]

4 hours ago, somegirl said:

I knew someone would write this... ?

Conscious lesbies feel so good as a concept 

[michaelcycle00]

@somegirl my bad, I hadn't checked this topic.

 

On 5/13/2022 at 3:25 AM, somegirl said:

Every time I posted my relationship problem on Reddit, I got advice that I should break up immediately and how he is such a red flag, worst person ever lol.

Oh yeah, typical Redditors. I mean I don't wanna turn into an incel, but I also don't wanna deny logic and how things are, even if it's not to my liking. Like if I'm ugly then I'm just ugly and that's it. I don't want people to pamper me and tell me how handsome I am when it's not the case. Or if I'm too sensitive I don't want people to tell me "no you just haven't learned how to process your emotions", etc. I hate it in fact. I don't wanna live in a bubble of blissful ignorance just because you don't wanna make me or someone else feel bad. 

Like when I posted here that I wasn't attractive enough, or of the appropriate race to be with like some beautiful white girl. If you didn't read it basically I said that I'd be robbing those girls of the chance of being with like some hot dude who'd satisfy them better and that I didn't wanna be settled with.

When I posted that I didn't want people to tell me "no but you're good enough", "you're just insecure" (which is what I got) but to basically guide me on how to make peace with my situation and integrate the TRUTH in a healthy way. Because it's obviously still a really hard pill to swallow.

On 5/13/2022 at 3:25 AM, somegirl said:

Those "I'm too good for you" with never ending list of criteria for guys usually aren't happy individuals and can't manage to get into a healthy relationship ever.

Apparently, they're just "standards".

On 5/13/2022 at 3:25 AM, somegirl said:

Sorryyy, not my intention!

All good 

On 5/13/2022 at 3:25 AM, somegirl said:

I will see how he will behave once we meet each other in real life. If he doesn't message me consistently after that, then all will be understood. 

You're meeting after all then? I wish you luck! (not being sarcastic) 

[Spiral]

My step mother often says: you need to kiss a hundred frogs before you find your prince.

Probably applies to a “Hot witch girlfriend” also.

Keep searching!

Edited May 15, 2022 by Spiral

[Jacob Morres]

I feel integrity does that. It's like you sacrifice egoic benefits but benefit in the soul.

Short term vs long term. Lower vs higher self 

Don't quote me on that lol 

Edited May 15, 2022 by Jacob Morres

[petar8p]

On 5/13/2022 at 2:36 AM, michaelcycle00 said:

On 5/10/2022 at 7:37 PM, somegirl said:

I guess he could even get girls he wants to only if he tries a little harder.

Try harder how? I resonate with the integrity part as well and how it tends to leave one sexless but honestly now that I have come to think of it, "sexual integrity" (if we wanna call it that) from a male POV is literally useless and a stupid thing to abide by. 

I've always been respectful and nice (not overly nice though) towards everyone, girls included. And that's it. You're just "a nice guy". I've had many girl friends in my life that I've been nice to, and some that I've liked romantically as well. I'm chill, funny, witty. I certainly have more good attributes than bad when it comes to being either a friend or a partner. Guess what I'm not and have never been towards the opposite sex though? Intense, selfish, opportunistic, bluntly direct. And that's just left me a single, 22 y/o virgin. Now, the funny part is, these girls I liked and was nice towards, were all eventually taken by a guy who was intense, selfish, opportunistic, and bluntly direct. This guy would date them, fuck them, leave them an emotional mess, whatever. Literally all of them without fail. He got what he wanted and made an actual lasting impression on them, other than just "he's a nice guy". 

See where I'm going with this? While we're playing the respectful type always remaining in the background somebody else isn't and he's the one winning. Girls fall for them all the time anyway. Might as well be me then. I'm done hiding my sexual impulses, and the OP shouldn't either.

Heck, we don't even have to get too far from home. You, for example, were ready to fall for this handsome Instagram mini-influencer who messaged you and I can guarantee, is messaging many other girls as well. But you decided to overlook this and give him a chance (although I believe he didn't message you back, correct?), despite saying that you want this amazingly deep, spiritual relationship and whatnot, yet deep down you know it had high chances of being a flop. Now the reason I say this is because that guy is a good example of someone who is 99% likely to be fucking many girls, not actually looking for anything serious, and they all flock towards him despite saying they want respect, equality, and all kinds of things. But tbh I know that women just say this for plausible deniability and their real intentions aren't really what they say they are.

 

Here's a deep, honest answer from Teal Swan. Thank me later and post what you think.

 

 

[Identity]

Thank you all for your messages. Last weeks there has been a lot going on for me, therefore I haven’t had space to respond. I’ve read all posts and they have been helpful.

@Ulax the meditation was interesting. Helped me to connect with the part in me that is protecting me from unleashing my sexuality. Will explore the relationship with that part more. Also, got a yoga nidra meditation qued up for when I go to bed in a bit.

Also an update; went to another ecstatic dance last weekend and had a beautiful interaction with a girl there. We ended up spending the night as well. We resonated in a lot of ways, am curious to see what will come from this. Am creating the space to explore our connection further.

I’m telling you guys, ecstatic dance is where it’s at ?

[Ulax]

@Identity Sounds great dude.

Glad it helped with connection.

Also, loving the sound of these ecstatic dances. Might have to try it out myself in the future