Approached a girl I liked, gave me her number but has a boyfriend.

[whoshearts]

I approached the girl at a cafe I go to and asked her if she wanted to hang out outside of the shop ever. She said yes, that she thought I was cool, but that she had a boyfriend. In hindsight, I'm worried this could be a shit-test, but that seems optimistic. She told me if we could be friends, that she would be down to hang out. Oddly enough, before I asked for her number, she asked for my phone and offered to give it to me.

I do find this girl extremely attractive. I do not want to be a homewrecker so I'm not interested in hanging out with her if she has a boyfriend, but I do desire to get my interest across in case she is ever available. I would like to find out if she was a shit-tester, a player/cheater, or a genuine girl who could be friends with a guy, but I find that hard to believe because I don't understand why a girl would give her number out if she had a boyfriend no matter the circumstance. 

What do I do in this situation? Do I text her with intention of finding something out? Do I not text her and just carry on with my normal interaction with the cafe? How do I set myself up for success with this woman if she's genuine, or how do I learn if she's not?

Thanks guys.

[JonasVE12]

You could say to her in a playful manner that you don't want to hang out with her because she has a boyfriend, and that although you've just met, you sense that you're not really interested in a friendship with her. You could say then 'There's just something about you' or something like that. And then leave it. 

[NoSelfSelf]

What success tho?

[whoshearts]

@NoSelfSelf The ideal form of "success" in this situation would be to eventually go on a regular date with her while we were both single. 

@JonasVE12 I was thinking of this. I was wondering if I should just do it in person. I don't want to send a really wordy text.

[NoSelfSelf]

@whoshearts Cool but she will do to you what she did to her bf you cant never trust her if you still wanna... go ahead ?

[whoshearts]

@NoSelfSelf This is absolutely what I'd like to sort out. I don't want to give it too much attention though. I would just like to find out if she's young and naive, or actually just a player who probably isn't worth a relationship.

[something_else]

Honestly, this sounds a bit too clingy. Don't get too invested or attached to her. There are plenty of other girls out there that you can chase who don't have boyfriends

[NoSelfSelf]

@whoshearts She showed you what she is if you looking for relationship then 100% move on nothing to sort out here shes not for what you want...

[whoshearts]

@something_else @NoSelfSelf Thanks lads, this is the right advice. 

[Arcangelo]

ATTENTION I am gonna use the word: Some.

SOME Women have a back up plan for the back up plan. She wants to throw you in the back burner.

[aurum]

@whoshearts If she genuinely has a boyfriend and that’s a boundary you don’t want to cross, I would just become friends with her. Add her to your social circle. Do things that friends would do.

At the same time, keep showing your attractive self. And keep your options open as far as dating. Don’t fixate on her and think you need to get her.

If you do become friends and she legit has a boyfriend, that should become obvious soon enough.

[NoSelfSelf]

@aurum Becoming friends? Thats worst possible advice you could have given.... so manipulative making yourself so below her and wasting your time and energy 3 big nos of the game?

[aurum]

@NoSelfSelf I’ve doomed him to the friendzone forever 

[Leo Gura]

On 4/29/2022 at 11:28 AM, whoshearts said:

I don't understand why a girl would give her number out if she had a boyfriend no matter the circumstance.

It's simple: To get you to leave her alone.

The #1 reason girls give out their number is so that you stop talking to them.

Move on to other girls. Stop wasting time on girls who are not excited by you or who have boyfriends. Most hot girls will have a boyfriend, so nothing surprising about that.

[flowboy]

On 29/04/2022 at 8:28 PM, whoshearts said:

I do find this girl extremely attractive. I do not want to be a homewrecker so I'm not interested in hanging out with her if she has a boyfriend, but I do desire to get my interest across in case she is ever available. I would like to find out if she was a shit-tester, a player/cheater, or a genuine girl who could be friends with a guy, but I find that hard to believe because I don't understand why a girl would give her number out if she had a boyfriend no matter the circumstance. 

She was being honest.

Why would she give out her number? Because girls like to make new connections.

You should only text her if you really want her as a friend.

If she's cool, she'll go out with you and help you pick up other girls.

If you're going to be secretly desiring to get with her all the time, though, it's not going to work and you shouldn't waste each other's time.