Could this be my zone of genius?

[Illusory Self]

I have been thinking really hard lately on what I naturally enjoy to do. I feel like my childhood has given me clues, my parents always used to tell me when I was younger that I am a great actor & should do acting classes, I have been experimenting today with just trying to cause different scenarios in reality to what I am used to. I feel a natural gravitation towards acting & especially comedy, but unfortunately it is covered up loads of layers of social anxiety + filters but I notice when I get into the enjoyable state of just not going into other peoples reality & staying in my own. I feel a sense of enjoyment when I am trying to make others laugh & troll in a funny way. Seeing others smile feels rather fulfilling. 

I notice when I am stuck in my head a lot & socially isolating from society because of my bad social anxiety with people and not being my usual troll funny self, I feel depressed, tired, lonely, sad. I am currently 26 & have spent the last 10 or so years mainly playing computer games + withdrawing from my society. To the point where my ego mind just wants to by itself & super fearful of authentically expressing myself in front of others. 

I feel a lot happier today when I was actually not isolating & talking to my family just saying stuff with no filters whatsoever. It makes me feel more free.

A lot of the times I feel very constricted with my own vocubalry, like how I should act etc but right now I am just typing without any mental filters. I feel the need to be 'perfect' a lot when communicating with others, even when journaling/texting. 

Could this be my zone of genius? I think I might start to take acting classes soon to see if I like it.

There is now a few possibilities on what I can do with this:

1. Start a comedy channel on youtube doing funny sketches 
2. Think of a funny series that is animated & can go on T.V
3. Take acting classes & audition for other peoples T.V shows/movies
4. Have my own comedy sketch series on T.V where I am a main actor/director

 

A few concerns I have are,

1. How do I know what one to go down or what to choose? 

2. Ideally I would like to spread a more positive message to raise consciousness of society, but ultimately I know I need to raise my own first

3. Is this not just low consciousness stuff, promoting T.V addiction? I feel like ultimately I am capable of more, but inner work is first required

 

Interested to hear all your thoughts

 

[Thought Art]

Start taking small bets. Make some content and see how it feels.

[aurum]

@Illusory Self

Did you ever try improv comedy?

I took a class in it. It’s super challenging for those of us who have anxiety (everyone) but extremely rewarding as well.

It’s not my zone of genius, but it definitely can be a path of not only social confidence, but even spiritual development. You really have to learn how to let go and trust.

[Illusory Self]

10 hours ago, aurum said:

@Illusory Self

Did you ever try improv comedy?

I took a class in it. It’s super challenging for those of us who have anxiety (everyone) but extremely rewarding as well.

It’s not my zone of genius, but it definitely can be a path of not only social confidence, but even spiritual development. You really have to learn how to let go and trust.

@aurum

 

I have heard of it, never done it though. May have to try it in the future