Women challenges in dating

[K Ghoul]

9 hours ago, puporing said:

Both are allowed to. I'm referring to a different way of living/relating than what we have at this point in time - for society as a whole to change where men and women are allowed freedom to be themselves and communicate their desires/wishes and be the responsible and sole agents of their lives without shame/guilt - which can mean anything, that loving someone is not conditional upon seeing someone everyday/week, living together or apart, how many partners you are 'in love with' at a given time.  

As we all know, love comes from within. Why don’t you be the change and set the example by reconfiguring the relationship you have with yourself - your body being the material representation of it. Allow yourself freedom to be yourself and communicate your desires/wishes. For example, you have an exciting event/vocation coming up and you only have a week to enjoy it. You can communicate to your body that you are the sole responsible agent of your life - which can mean anything- and that loving yourself (your body) is not conditional upon nourishing it with food, letting it sleep/rest, or giving it water. And see how “loving” your relationship with it will become after this.

 

If you think that love between man and woman - not some bastardized version of it that you are fantasizing about - is any different from the relationship between yourself and your body, then I can only conclude that you haven’t experienced and therefore don’t know what love is.
 

8 hours ago, puporing said:

@Spence94 You create the world you want to see.

You god damn satanists.

Why can’t you be happy right now instead of manufacturing some mental constructs of the future where you think you and everyone else can be free and - uhm - happy?

[integral]

The biggest struggle is learning the hard way what a healthy relationship is. This means dating around and getting locked into bad relationships for years until you figure out what you really want.

[Spence94]

@Razard86 I'll check out the video.

Actually I lived and saw the world through the polyamorous perspective for a few years and the end result was I concluded that monogamy was what I prefer. Before all of that I was convinced marriage was some form of archaic slavery. I no longer believe that anymore.

'Sex at Dawn' is an eye opener. Not sure if it's all accurate but an eye opening book. Duncan Trussel made the point that at the very least the book meant people don't have to feel guilt and shame for being attracted to other people outside of their relationship. Doesn't mean they have to cheat or be polyamorous, but they can accept the attraction to others as natural and normal. 

Edited April 2, 2022 by Spence94

[puporing]

10 hours ago, Spence94 said:

I agree though, a world where all the possibilities are given and accepted amongst the collective narrative would be the ideal situation. The process to actually create that in the world would be extremely difficult and won't happen anytime soon. Especially as we still live in a world with borders and nationalities  that are at different stages of collective development  and that divide and create separate unique narratives around relationships and sex.

Yes you get it , the dissolution of a strong sense of seperation between people/groups. Long way to go but I have faith. 

3 hours ago, Razard86 said:

Everything you said I agree with. The TRUTH is, people are just too selfish right now to be in an open relationship. I actually think done right open relationships are probably the most healthy. Leo did a video once talking about Gender and made some surprising remarks that speak to what you say.

I believe though that when the collective consciousness of humanity reached heights not seen, monogamy will fade away. Wonder how many thousands of years that will take.

Yeah you get it, most of us are still mainly driven by fear and the mindset of 'acquiring' things which some think of their partner and children as a form of acquiring and therefore don't want to deal with 'losing' such acquisitions. One thing that is probably required for this to happen is much more healing of generational trauma to get ourselves to be as complete/whole of beings as we can, self-actualizing, and have an economic system that secures the basic necessities for all of us. 
 

2 hours ago, K Ghoul said:

Why can’t you be happy right now instead of manufacturing some mental constructs of the future where you think you and everyone else can be free and - uhm - happy?

I just see the potential for more happiness, more truth, more love, and more joy. Because not everyone fits in the same shoes and I'm certainly not alone in this, have you considered people are just too afraid to even talk about this stuff because it always gets immediately shut down? Someone has to start the process of advocating. 

[K Ghoul]

40 minutes ago, puporing said:

Yes you get it , the dissolution of a strong sense of seperation between people/groups. Long way to go but I have faith. 

Yeah you get it, most of us are still mainly driven by fear and the mindset of 'acquiring' things which some think of their partner and children as a form of acquiring and therefore don't want to deal with 'losing' such acquisitions. One thing that is probably required for this to happen is much more healing of generational trauma to get ourselves to be as complete/whole of beings as we can, self-actualizing, and have an economic system that secures the basic necessities for all of us. 
 

I just see the potential for more happiness, more truth, more love, and more joy. Because not everyone fits in the same shoes and I'm certainly not alone in this, have you considered people are just too afraid to even talk about this stuff because it always gets immediately shut down? Someone has to start the process of advocating. 

yep, just a loving, carrying little angel on a mission to bring love and peace to all those that are lost.

 

What you think you are advocating for is called satanism - your white is back, and your black is white. You are promoting dehumanization. Your mind has been corrupt and you no longer see that the road you are on is not leading to more happiness- it’s leading away from it. Perhaps ask yourself if you actually have the knowledge of the good and evil before taking upon yourself a responsibility of “advocating” something. Because this something might just be an anti-human ideology and the more people you infect with it, the more of them will suffer. 

I hope one day the light of truth will shine upon your spirit and will illuminate you.

[Federico del pueblo]

Now it's getting interesting ?

[K Ghoul]

2 minutes ago, Federico del pueblo said:

Now it's getting interesting ?

Now is a good time to pick your side in this battle between Light and Darkness haha Before the Sword of Truth is raised and your heart is pierced by it! I take no hostages  

[Gesundheit2]

@puporing The views you're suggesting seem compatible with what Osho thought about sexuality.

[Federico del pueblo]

I think people should do whatever they want with their vaginas and penisses (and who knows what else) as long as everybody involved is fine with it.

[Preety_India]

13 hours ago, Spence94 said:

@puporing Or maybe people could learn to understand that their attraction for others is natural even if they are in a monogamous relationship. Just because there is a desire and attraction whilst in a relationship doesn't mean we should live in a world where everyone is free to just follow that impulse for 'fun'. Men can be pretty committed when in a relationship, just like women can. 

I agree women are more shamed for having fun and sleeping around, but you make it sound like men are freely allowed to sleep around with other people outside of their relationship  when women aren't... and even if men are less shamed for that act, it doesn't mean it would be healthy for both men and women to be able to freely act on their desire for 'fun' outside of a monogamous relationship.

I don't think this utopian idea of free love and sex would actually work for most people and society.

Open relationships have a place, and if the two people decide on it then fine, that's okay, but they're not for everyone and neither should they be.

Monogamy still has value in an evolved and concious society, and would actually be the better option for a lot of people, IMO. 

This 'monogamy and marriage is outdated and doesn't work' idea that is becoming more popular nowadays is a very black and white way to look at it.

High divorce rates are not happening because we need to be allowed to sleep around outside of relationships, high divorce rates are happening because people are not psychologically mature and don't understand or embody healthy attraction and communication in relationships. Which is a problem for both men and women.

Anyway, rant over.

Peace.

Agree with this. I'm getting sick of the modern narrative .

[Razard86]

1 hour ago, K Ghoul said:

yep, just a loving, carrying little angel on a mission to bring love and peace to all those that are lost.

 

What you think you are advocating for is called satanism - your white is back, and your black is white. You are promoting dehumanization. Your mind has been corrupt and you no longer see that the road you are on is not leading to more happiness- it’s leading away from it. Perhaps ask yourself if you actually have the knowledge of the good and evil before taking upon yourself a responsibility of “advocating” something. Because this something might just be an anti-human ideology and the more people you infect with it, the more of them will suffer. 

I hope one day the light of truth will shine upon your spirit and will illuminate you.

See no evil, do no evil. As long as you see Devilry then you are seeing the Devil in you.  "Judge not, that ye be not judged.
For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. - Matthew 7:1-2

All of existence is here because God sees it is good. Apparently you know better than Infinite Love and Intelligence. The Light of Truth says that God created reality, and if reality is made up of God then how can it be evil? Anything that God creates is not separate from God but is of God. So if there is evil what do you think that means? All separation is illusion, until you realize this it is you who needs illumination. You have much Shadow work to do.

[puporing]

1 hour ago, K Ghoul said:

Because this something might just be an anti-human ideology and the more people you infect with it, the more of them will suffer. 

Just the opposite, my intention is to liberate and relieve people from what's keeping them from experiencing more joy/love/abundance, to whom it resonates with. I respect yours and anyone else's agency in their life and how you wish to live/be, it is all part of creation. You cannot understand what I'm saying because you don't have the direct experience I refer to so you choose to demonize and throw a bunch of labels around for what you cannot yet understand so that it is out of mind and out of sight. 

[K Ghoul]

13 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

See no evil, do no evil. As long as you see Devilry then you are seeing the Devil in you.  "Judge not, that ye be not judged.
For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. - Matthew 7:1-2

All of existence is here because God sees it is good. Apparently you know better than Infinite Love and Intelligence. The Light of Truth says that God created reality, and if reality is made up of God then how can it be evil? Anything that God creates is not separate from God but is of God. So if there is evil what do you think that means? All separation is illusion, until you realize this it is you who needs illumination. You have much Shadow work to do.

“Judge not, that ye be not judged” - the interpretation is to not invent your own morality outside of established Universal Laws. Or do/invent and judge reality in those invented terms, and be judged the same way back. 

Your understanding of good is also warped - it does not equal love. Good simply means compliance with the established universal laws, non-compliance means evil. 

And don’t worry about me - whatever work I have to do I am doing it.

 

12 minutes ago, puporing said:

You cannot understand what I'm saying because you don't have the direct experience I refer to so you choose to demonize and throw a bunch of labels around for what you cannot yet understand so that it is out of mind and out of sight. 

It’s the opposite - because I have direct experience of what you are saying I am able to see it for what it is. Because I have also seen something that is still escaping you, obviously. Note, also, that it’s not me trying to liberate anyone or is on the mission to “relive people” - I’m fine with them going their way and their lives do not concern me. You, on the other hand, are “advocating” instead of just living your own life and leading by example.
 

[puporing]

12 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

You, on the other hand, are “advocating” instead of just living your own life and leading by example.

How do you know I am not? I am not on a mission other than embodying the truths I experience. There's not much else "to do" and I have no goal. Speaking up by responding to the initial poster's question and later posts from others is part of how I want to live my life, expressing myself genuinely right now on this forum despite having to deal with bullies like yourself is how I want to live my life. You are attempting to stop me from living my life instead of just minding yours. You don't have to like what I say and you're welcome to express differring opinions, and I have repeatedly said I respect differring opinions. Instead you are following my posts constantly and resorting to labels and names. This is a space for people to be genuine and truthful and I hope it keeps being that way.

Edited April 2, 2022 by puporing

[K Ghoul]

1 minute ago, puporing said:

How do you know I am not? I am not on a mission other than embodying the truths I experience. There's not much else "to do" and I have no goal. Speaking up by responding to the initial poster's question and later posts from others is part of how I want to live my life, expressing myself genuinely right now on this forum despite having to deal with bullies like yourself. You are attempting to stop me from living my life instead of just minding yours. You don't have to like what I say and you're welcome to express differring opinions, and I have repeatedly said I respect differring opinions. Instead you are following my posts constantly and resorting to labels and names. This is a space for people to be genuine and truthful and I hope it keeps being that way.

How am I supposed to express myself and my opinion that is opposite of yours in any other way other than disagreeing with what you’re saying and describing things how I see it? I don’t think you understand what bullying is - someone expressing their position that opposes yours in terms that are not sugar-coated is not it.  
 

[puporing]

1 minute ago, K Ghoul said:

I don’t think you understand what bullying is - someone expressing their position that opposes yours in terms that are not sugar-coated is not it.  

That's not what you are doing. You started by name-calling like "satan" and directing a bunch of labels at me for expressing myself genuinely, with the intention of shutting me up. Why not take a look at how others have been expressing differing opinions? 

 

 

[K Ghoul]

1 minute ago, puporing said:

That's not what you are doing. You started by name-calling like "satan" and directing a bunch of labels at me for expressing myself genuinely, with the intention of shutting me up. Why not take a look at how others have been expressing differing opinions? 

 

 

Not at all - it’s an invitation to opening you up, to a dialogue that you can choose to engage in and explore things further. Or you can choose not to engage, and let that be the end of it. The fact that you are triggered by this is something for you to dig into. 
Satanism is the inversion of truth. 

[puporing]

I am saying you were not interested to discuss non-monogamy in the first place, nowhere have you stated any points of your own regarding why you favor monogamy. Instead you're just engaged in demonization and judgement of something you don't agree with/understand, and projecting a bunch of stuff claiming to know what I am and how I think. I don't engage with this because it's not about what was being said in the first place.

I am still responding simply because I do not give in to bullies attempting to silence my voice.

 

Edited April 2, 2022 by puporing

[K Ghoul]

I won’t tag you or quote your comments to avoid making you feel bullied, so you are free to engage if you feel like it, or not- either or is fine with me.

in terms of polygamy, my stance on it is very clear and non-ambiguous- it has no place in a relationship where there is love between two people. Your position is that one can transcend the notion of possessing someone and thus, the idea of free love can emerge and exist. I argue that it’s not how things work in the physical reality, and that precisely my knowledge of what unconditional love between two human beings looks like cancels the possibility of them sharing or even wanting to share that connection with anyone else outside of their bond. 

[Federico del pueblo]

So glad that for once I'm not the one receiving the attacks ?

@K Ghoul Honestly I think @puporing has a fair point when it comes to how you expressed your opposing views with all of your "satanism" and other similar labels. Also judging by the posts of both of you she doesn't seem to be more "triggered" than you.

So now let's all be nice to each other again and discuss in a way that is adequate for adult people, ok?