Am I an energy vampire?

[Preety_India]

I've heard of the term energy vampire in spiritual circles. I don't know if it has any validity to it. But could it be possible that someone is an energy vampire and they are not aware of it? 

I read this thread a couple of days ago and it got me thinking. 

Since then I haven't been able to shake off this feeling that I could be one. 

@JosephKnecht@J@JosephKnecht I'm not sure if you got the solution you were looking for.

But even thinking that I could be an energy vampire is very frightening to accept. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I need some guidance. I'm breaking down. I don't know how to deal with these thoughts. Please help me. 

Should I pay attention to these thoughts or neglect them?

 

[Vincent S]

37 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

I've heard of the term energy vampire in spiritual circles. I don't know if it has any validity to it. But could it be possible that someone is an energy vampire and they are not aware of it? 

Yes, it happens mostly on an unconscious level. Few do it intentionally…

Life guides you and through relationships with others, these will tend to come up to the surface for us to observe, either when others do this to us, or we doing it to them. Sadly thats like the only times we can really and truly catch the habit and see it for what it truly is.

You can also scan your memory, and see if you can remember yourself trying to include yourself in someones life without them being in on it, only because you wanted something from them, and they only being nice, but uncomfortable because it has been their people-pleasing side whom chosen to respond/give.   
Or times when you have been clingy or “sticky” to people who have pushed you away in a friendly manner, repeatedly,  only for it to end with them completely cutting you out from their life. Sometimes not even bothering telling you why.

There are probably a lot more signs and ways you can observe and catch yourself being an “energy vampire”. Its all about being aware if it, more and more. Catching yourself and or others doing it.  
We all do, and have done this at some point in our lives. Some more than others.
Its “normal” and a common phenomena and bound to happen considering how poorly some of us get raised.

Its really something that develops during childhood and early adult life. Its very sneaky and unconsciously manipulative behavior out of a sense of not being fulfilled (lack) and wanting what others have.

People who have low self esteem are prone tho being victims of energy vampirism. And sometimes some of them even develop the same habit. So in some cases and relationships they are the energy vampires, and in a few others they play the victim role.

The best way these are solved and seen, is only through self reflection and mirroring interactions with other mirrors (people). 
These mirrors have to reflect each other so much, that its finally seen for what it is, and resolved within the individual. Integrated and healed. And the desire to have what others have, is being dropped. Feeling fulfilled with what we have and cherishing our own process in life.

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, Vincent S said:

Yes, it happens mostly on an unconscious level. Few do it intentionally…

Life guides you and through relationships with others, these will tend to come up to the surface for us to observe, either when others do this to us, or we doing it to them. Sadly thats like the only times we can really and truly catch the habit and see it for what it truly is.

You can also scan your memory, and see if you can remember yourself trying to include yourself in someones life without them being in on it, only because you wanted something from them, and they only being nice, but uncomfortable because it has been their people-pleasing side whom chosen to respond/give.   
Or times when you have been clingy or “sticky” to people who have pushed you away in a friendly manner, repeatedly,  only for it to end with them completely cutting you out from their life. Sometimes not even bothering telling you why.

There are probably a lot more signs and ways you can observe and catch yourself being an “energy vampire”. Its all about being aware if it, more and more. Catching yourself and or others doing it.  
We all do, and have done this at some point in our lives. Some more than others.
Its “normal” and a common phenomena and bound to happen considering how poorly some of us get raised.

Its really something that develops during childhood and early adult life. Its very sneaky and unconsciously manipulative behavior out of a sense of not being fulfilled (lack) and wanting what others have.

People who have low self esteem are prone tho being victims of energy vampirism. And sometimes some of them even develop the same habit. So in some cases and relationships they are the energy vampires, and in a few others they play the victim role.

The best way these are solved and seen, is only through self reflection and mirroring interactions with other mirrors (people). 
These mirrors have to reflect each other so much, that its finally seen for what it is, and resolved within the individual. Integrated and healed. And the desire to have what others have, is being dropped. Feeling fulfilled with what we have and cherishing our own process in life.

So many many thanks for this response. It cleared up a lot of my thoughts and mental gymnastics. Right now the picture is getting clearer. Also thankful for all the suggestions given to stop being a vampire

 

Tremendous growth through just 1 post. Thank you. 

 

[Vincent S]

49 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

I need some guidance. I'm breaking down. I don't know how to deal with these thoughts. Please help me. 

Should I pay attention to these thoughts or neglect them?

 

Its okay. Just accept the feeling if you know you have been guilty of it. Look at it for what it is. And just own up to it. Allow yourself to let out the emotions if you have done it to others, or have been a victim of it yourself.  
  
Forgive yourself and forgive others. Without the need to call them up and begging for forgiveness. Just feel in to the emotions of the times you have done it to others or times its been done to you. Let these two parts of you meet “each other” within you. Let the healing begin.

Edited March 23, 2022 by Vincent S

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, Vincent S said:

Its okay. Just accept the feeling if you know you have been guilty of it. Look at it for what it is. And just own up to it. Allow yourself to let out the emotions if you have done it to others, or have been a victim of it yourself.  
  
Forgive yourself and forgive others. Without the need to call them up and begging for forgiveness. Just feel in to the emotions of the times you have done it to others or times its been done to you. Let these tho parts of you meet “each other” within you. Let the healing begin.

Yup. 

[Vincent S]

4 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

So many many thanks for this response. It cleared up a lot of my thoughts and mental gymnastics. Right now the picture is getting clearer. Also thankful for all the suggestions given to stop being a vampire

 

Tremendous growth through just 1 post. Thank you. 

 

Welcome ?

[Guru Fat Bastard]

To be something, whatever it may be, you would have to know how to be it. You would have to have some knowledge of how to be it in order to be it, otherwise you could not be that thing. Since you are wondering if you could be that thing,it means you have no knowledge of being that thing or how to be it or even become it. It is a false imagination of creating a thought, seeing it as a problem to solve or get out of, then trying to find a solution to get out of it. When it was never a reality or problem in the first place.
See the joke and nonsense in all of this. It's quite ridiculous, really.

Just to note,I'm not saying you are ridiculous. This is how mind creates problems then tries to solve them. It creates its own problem to get out of. It really is ridiculous and kind of funny to watch,if you're just watching it.

Edited March 23, 2022 by Guru Fat Bastard

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Guru Fat Bastard said:

To be something, whatever it may be, you would have to know how to be it. You would have to have some knowledge of how to be it in order to be it, otherwise you could not be that thing Since you are wondering if you could be that thing,it means you have no knowledge of being that thing or how to be it or even become it. It is a false imagination of creating a thought, seeing it as a problem to solve or get out of, then trying to find a solution to get out of it. When it was never a reality or problem in the first place.
See the joke and nonsense in all of this. It's quite ridiculous, really.

The problem is it would have been ridiculous if it had been entirely untrue. 

But then I looked up the definition and did some research on my own and found that I did engage in emotional vampire behaviors myself like threatening someone etc. 

That lead me to think that I must have some darkness in me. 

The thing is by using this logic almost every person on planet earth is an energy vampire, not to imply that it's redundant because of its universality, just that being more conscious of it opens up channels for further cleansing and healing of the personality, when these impurities are removed, a better higher self emerges. 

It's like if I said I'm guilty of lying. And someone says "that's okay because everyone lies" but honestly that's not okay, the better road would be to stop lying or at least minimize it and create as much high consciousness and clamp down on low consciousness so you clean up your energies and the energies of your environment, imagine if everyone did this then the world will be a better place. 

Often times we shame the negative so much that we just don't confront it, because our ego just cannot handle such self negativity, so we rather turn a blind eye to it than detect and improve on it, this happens because of excessive shaming that actually blocks the process of reversal or healing by simply demonizing the whole aspect of scanning for flaws, the ego is so resistant that it just doesn't want to hear that it must have fucked up in some way unconsciously and so the growth never happens because that channel is always blocked by insecurity, pride, tension, fear and ego. 

. 

[Guru Fat Bastard]

21 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

The problem is it would have been ridiculous if it had been entirely untrue. 

But then I looked up the definition and did some research on my own and found that I did engage in emotional vampire behaviors myself like threatening someone etc. 

That lead me to think that I must have some darkness in me. 

The thing is by using this logic almost every person on planet earth is an energy vampire, not to imply that it's redundant because of its universality, just that being more conscious of it opens up channels for further cleansing and healing of the personality, when these impurities are removed, a better higher self emerges. 

It's like if I said I'm guilty of lying. And someone says "that's okay because everyone lies" but honestly that's not okay, the better road would be to stop lying or at least minimize it and create as much high consciousness and clamp down on low consciousness so you clean up your energies and the energies of your environment, imagine if everyone did this then the world will be a better place. 

Often times we shame the negative so much that we just don't confront it, because our ego just cannot handle such self negativity, so we rather turn a blind eye to it than detect and improve on it, this happens because of excessive shaming that actually blocks the process of reversal or healing by simply demonizing the whole aspect of scanning for flaws, the ego is so resistant that it just doesn't want to hear that it must have fucked up in some way unconsciously and so the growth never happens because that channel is always blocked by insecurity, pride, tension, fear and ego. 

. 

To me, that's quite a bit of clarity and insight. To acknowledge it and seek to heal it takes a lot of courage. Just by seeing this alone is a huge step. The spiritual path is certainly not always sunshine and roses.it can be tough. I sincerely wish you the best.❤️

Edited March 23, 2022 by Guru Fat Bastard

[WelcometoReality]

2 hours ago, Preety_India said:

The problem is it would have been ridiculous if it had been entirely untrue. 

But then I looked up the definition and did some research on my own and found that I did engage in emotional vampire behaviors myself like threatening someone etc. 

That lead me to think that I must have some darkness in me. 

The thing is by using this logic almost every person on planet earth is an energy vampire, not to imply that it's redundant because of its universality, just that being more conscious of it opens up channels for further cleansing and healing of the personality, when these impurities are removed, a better higher self emerges. 

It's like if I said I'm guilty of lying. And someone says "that's okay because everyone lies" but honestly that's not okay, the better road would be to stop lying or at least minimize it and create as much high consciousness and clamp down on low consciousness so you clean up your energies and the energies of your environment, imagine if everyone did this then the world will be a better place. 

Often times we shame the negative so much that we just don't confront it, because our ego just cannot handle such self negativity, so we rather turn a blind eye to it than detect and improve on it, this happens because of excessive shaming that actually blocks the process of reversal or healing by simply demonizing the whole aspect of scanning for flaws, the ego is so resistant that it just doesn't want to hear that it must have fucked up in some way unconsciously and so the growth never happens because that channel is always blocked by insecurity, pride, tension, fear and ego. 

. 

I think it's great that your willing to see these flaws and take action toward healing. Shaming is more negativity which creates a neverending loop or in the worst cases it ends in self hatred and suicide. 

Letting go of these feelings will instead create a neverending loop of positivity into love and self transcendence.

[axiom]

5 hours ago, Preety_India said:

I need some guidance. I'm breaking down. I don't know how to deal with these thoughts. Please help me. 

Should I pay attention to these thoughts or neglect them?

 

Reassurance-seeking is a big part of what energy vampirism is, although I personally think the term itself is quite ridiculous. 

Really I think it's just a new-age term for borderline personality disorder (BPD), which is well-understood.

Maybe check out the symptoms of this and see how many you can relate to. 

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, axiom said:

Reassurance-seeking is a big part of what energy vampirism is, although I personally think the term itself is quite ridiculous. 

Really I think it's just a new-age term for borderline personality disorder (BPD), which is well-understood.

Maybe check out the symptoms of this and see how many you can relate to. 

I have checked for BPD with a psychiatrist and I don't have it. But they told me that I have anxiety that can lead to behaviors of uncertainty and insecurity coming from deep fears. 

 

[Razard86]

Here is a good source of energy vampires. https://scottjeffrey.com/emotional-energy-vampires/

The thing to understand....anytime you believe you lack you WILL engage in some form of energy vampirism.

Think of the feeling of lack as a lack of gratitude with self, and everything you identify with self i.e. present circumstances, past, assumed future prospects, repressed emotions and thoughts. As long as you operate from this "state" you will engage in vampirism.

Its no different than as long as someone is hungry they will eat, as long as someone is thirsty they will drink.  You engage in these acts to calm these desires. The problem is all eating and drinking only temporarily calms these desires, the same way identifying with finitude/ or lack only allows you momentary calming of desires when you engage in an activity and reach a desired result.

The WHOLE purpose of awakening is to identify with the infinite and this will dissolve the feeling of lack and stop you from being a devil/vampire. The truth is unless the identity one has taken up is infinite... they have sentenced themselves to a life of devilry/vampirism. 

Edited March 23, 2022 by Razard86

[Breakingthewall]

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

The thing is by using this logic almost every person on planet earth is an energy vampire,

In my opinion, a energy vampire is a narcissistic. that is, people who look for a reaction in others to feel validated. Usually it is a reaction of admiration, but it can be another, even hatred. it means that you feel incomplete and seek (unsuccessfully) that the energy of others completes you. indeed, most people in the world are to some extent

[Preety_India]

13 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

Here is a good source of energy vampires. https://scottjeffrey.com/emotional-energy-vampires/

The thing to understand....anytime you believe you lack you WILL engage in some form of energy vampirism.

Think of the feeling of lack as a lack of gratitude with self, and everything you identify with self i.e. present circumstances, past, assumed future prospects, repressed emotions and thoughts. As long as you operate from this "state" you will engage in vampirism.

Its no different than as long as someone is hungry they will eat, as long as someone is thirsty they will drink.  You engage in these acts to calm these desires. The problem is all eating and drinking only temporarily calms these desires, the same way identifying with finitude/ or lack only allows you momentary calming of desires when you engage in an activity and reach a desired result.

The WHOLE purpose of awakening is to identify with the infinite and this will dissolve the feeling of lack and stop you from being a devil/vampire. The truth is unless the identity one has taken up is infinite... they have sentenced themselves to a life of devilry/vampirism. 

This is quite good.

Problem is that it doesn't look practical. 

How is a person practically supposed to Embody infinity in their lives? 

A manual? A guide? A set of steps? 

 

[axiom]

6 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

This is quite good.

Problem is that it doesn't look practical. 

How is a person practically supposed to Embody infinity in their lives? 

A manual? A guide? A set of steps? 

Have you ever done SDS / strong determination meditation? I think a 10-day silent meditation retreat would be a huge step in the right direction for you (and anyone else, really). It's free to do it, and there are no catches. The food they serve tends to be delicious too. You can find a list of upcoming retreats at dhamma.org.

[Batman]

7 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

This is quite good.

Problem is that it doesn't look practical. 

How is a person practically supposed to Embody infinity in their lives? 

A manual? A guide? A set of steps? 

 

By becoming conscious of it deeper and deeper.

If you are using other's presence to feel better about your self, I would consider you someone who feeds on the energy of others. This is actually not so rare in modern cultures. The primary function of ego is to feed of another. If you are strongly attached to your thought forms, you are probably engaging in activities and manipulations that reinforce your thoughts and beliefs regarding yourself, which usually includes consuming the energy of others (whether it is by communicating them your opinions and beliefs without being open to hear their side, or by arguing with them, making them feel weak, drawing them to your ego activities, etc.).

[JosephKnecht]

6 hours ago, Preety_India said:

@JosephKnecht@J@JosephKnecht I'm not sure if you got the solution you were looking for.

But even thinking that I could be an energy vampire is very frightening to accept. 

I do think that it's possible that we can take the energy of others, but not without their consent. 

In cults, the cult leader has learned how to utilize this energy from his followers and can 'channel' that energy into alternative uses. 

From the highest POV, everything is just energy flow and if you are not aware of these energy flows, you will be 'used' by them. 

The way to stop feeding on others is to become full of yourself, by yourself. 

 

[Breakingthewall]

35 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

This is quite good.

Problem is that it doesn't look practical. 

How is a person practically supposed to Embody infinity in their lives? 

A manual? A guide? A set of steps? 

 

there is no manual for enlightenment. it is a process that has to come out of yourself. a change of perception of reality that when it starts starts a cascade reaction. many things can trigger it, suffering is one of them