Girl Rejected Me Because I Don't Drink

[something_else]

3 hours ago, Preety_India said:

What so wrong about bending? 

Organic people don't think too much about high value and low value. 

They value everyone equally. They don't divide humanity into high value and low value. They prefer unity of human race versus division. 

We are all equal spiritually. Nobody is high or low. 

Ever heard of terms like Elitism and Classism? 

Such thinking leads to creating of high class and low class in the mind and that's the most unspiritual ungodly act, let alone high value 

 

Organic people automatically eliminate Elitists like you. Good on them. 

That's bad karma they avoid 

Lol.

Do you see the irony here?

You're creating elitism between what you called 'organic people' and 'non-organic people' which is exactly the same thing as dividing people into high and low value categories

 

[Preety_India]

3 minutes ago, something_else said:

Lol.

Do you see the irony here?

You're creating elitism between what you called 'organic people' and 'non-organic people' which is exactly the same thing as dividing people into high and low value categories

 

In a way yeah. But it's not Elitism to criticize Elitism. 

You see that? 

 

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

But who decided that he is an elitist?

To me it looks like he gave genuine advice that is helpful and makes sense and you projected your own insecurities at him, called him an elitist and started attacking him because of it.

 

Just FYI, this sounds much more arrogant and aggressive than what he wrote. So I am not sure who is an elitist here, lol.

I didn't attack him. I respect him. Just that if someone says high value low value I find it elitist. 

It makes me feel like we are making people feel bad by saying they are low. 

 

[NoSelfSelf]

There is this thing called "Buyer vs Seller Frame" you are coming from the place of a seller how can i do something to impress or show im good enough where buyer comes from a place im awesome how can this person fit in my life does she has what i want..

[something_else]

59 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

In a way yeah. But it's not Elitism to criticize Elitism. 

You see that? 

 

Your wording of it was quite elitist itself, that's all I was pointing out

[NoSelfSelf]

@Something Funny Yeah theres a trick to it...its all about the place its coming from you are either coming there to chase and react to girl or you are going there to make her chase and care more by showing how awesome guy you are vs going there to prove you are an awesome guy(you chasing to get her and proving it)...

[Emrie]

Thanks everyone for the advice, it's actually really bang-on.

While I didn't really care that she rejected me, I definitely didn't have the frame of "I'm awesome and you should show me that you are also awesome". I think Leo talked about this in his first How to Get Laid video, the frame that, even though I'm the one approaching (actually for this one she approached me after we made eye contact but w/e), I need to talk to her in a way where she's supposed to show me she's worth my time, not the other way around.

[Lyubov]

I screened out girls because they don’t drink. You gotta find someone who matches your lifestyle. I don’t see the point in going to a bar and not drinking and it’s fine if someone does but I couldn’t really vibe with such a woman that agrees to go to a bar on a date and then drinks tea. 

[Matthew85]

4 hours ago, Emrie said:

I need to talk to her in a way where she's supposed to show me she's worth my time, not the other way around.

@Emrie This is it buddy. I don't drink either and it's never been an issue for me. It's about knowing your value. 

[Danioover9000]

   I don't know nor have the entire context to base about said people who are anti alcohol or pro alcohol. Whenever I go and hear a person say they are 100% sober, and don't drink, and another person says they drink moderately, sometimes they take a break, and all this while being in a bar or night club, it cringes me, like why are you in a place that serves alcohol legally in a social context? I get preach anti feels, and feel a person is withholding a little bit more happiness by forcing themselves to be inflexible and rigid. 

[Emrie]

On 24/03/2022 at 3:04 AM, Danioover9000 said:

   I don't know nor have the entire context to base about said people who are anti alcohol or pro alcohol. Whenever I go and hear a person say they are 100% sober, and don't drink, and another person says they drink moderately, sometimes they take a break, and all this while being in a bar or night club, it cringes me, like why are you in a place that serves alcohol legally in a social context? I get preach anti feels, and feel a person is withholding a little bit more happiness by forcing themselves to be inflexible and rigid. 

It's the opposite for me, actually. Drinking would actually bring me unhappiness because I just don't like the effects of alcohol.

[Danioover9000]

@Emrie

5 minutes ago, Emrie said:

It's the opposite for me, actually. Drinking would actually bring me unhappiness because I just don't like the effects of alcohol.

   HOW???

   I understand if it's trauma related, but please some people don't view it like you do, and assuming they get it when they don't makes you look crazy to them.

[Danioover9000]

@Something Funny

2 hours ago, Something Funny said:

@Danioover9000

This can be applied to you just as well. How can poisoning yourself and making yourself numb and dumb  make someone happy? some people don't view it like you do, and assuming they get it when they don't makes you look crazy to them.

Also, there is nothing crazy about what he wrote, he is just expressing his experience without judging you or saying that you are wrong. You, on the other hand are trying to push your believes onto him, saying that his experience is somehow wrong.

 

Look how judgemental you are. What's so cringe about a person wanting to socialize without hurting their health? Usually people who don't drink alcohol don't try to preach their lifestyle to anyone. On the contrary, they try to make it as insignificant and unnoticable as possible. It's people who drink who always make a big deal out of it with stuff like: "what!? You don't drink!? Why!? You are strange!"

Why do you feel the need to do that? What makes it so hard for you to hangout with sober people without "cringing" yourself out or making a big deal out of it? Is it because they are making you insecure  on some level since you know they are probably doing the right thing and have the balls to not bend over peer pressure?

   I don't know, maybe they drink because they have numerous pains and sufferings they need to numb themselves with. Maybe the loss of inhibition makes one more courageous than normal. Maybe the person loves the rum, or red wine, and it's related to a celebration, a celebration of something like a big accomplishment or a birthday, or maybe the alcohol is needed to lick one's wounds. Many motivations for many behaviors, like drinking, lower to higher forms of motives.

   I didn't mean to offend or assume, but it was unavoidable. However, be responsible whether to drink or not to. As long as one is aware that it is not motivated out of fear, that's all.

   

[OceanRiver]

@Emrie What's more funny, a woman that says drinking is an important part of her life or the dude that gets rejected by her but still wants similar chicks badly enough that he's coming up with ideas to not be rejected for being a non-drinker?