Have you ever truly loved another?

[Michael Jackson]

True Love is to want for another, what that other wants for itself. True Love is, to not need anything from that other, and to not desire anything, except for that other to fully be it self and to express what it truly wants to express.

 

Most people have never in their entire life loved another. They have not loved their women. They have not loved their husbands. They have not loved their children. Not their family. Not their neighbours. Not even loved themselves.

People confuse pleasure and attachment with Love. Love has nothing to do with need, nothing to do with pleasure, nothing to do with attachment. What our society calls "Love" is an ugly perversion of what Love truly is. It has nothing to do with actual Love.

 

Realizing that you have never loved opens a profound possibility. The possibility for true Love. Have you ever loved?

I have not.

[Preety_India]

This is very helpful to me. I will try to Embody this kind of love in my life 

 

Maybe in the past I always expected something. 

 

May God give me the strength to be capable of such love. 

Thanks for sharing this beautiful post. 

We make mistake. We are only human. 

 

[vizual]

Yes I have loved a woman so much that I was willing to give my life for her, do anything for her, just being in her presence made me happy,  fulfilled and she inspired me to be the best person I could be. I experienced a deep 'spiritual' connection with her, meaning we could communicate with each other just by lookign at each other for a split second, weird synchronicities going on. It was good, but it didn't end well and I got hurt. I think the love I experienced was real, but that that person was more of a gateway for me to get in touch with that higher love, which is ultimately inside of me, or the universe, or however you want to call it. I think deep romantic love is a step up somewhere on the ladder toward the highest love, because ultimately romantic love is still very conditional. But it can give you glimpses into unconditional love.

[Michael Jackson]

1 hour ago, Preety_India said:

This is very helpful to me. I will try to Embody this kind of love in my life 

 

Maybe in the past I always expected something. 

 

May God give me the strength to be capable of such love. 

Thanks for sharing this beautiful post. 

We make mistake. We are only human. 

 

@Preety_India <3

1 hour ago, vizual said:

I think the love I experienced was real, but that that person was more of a gateway for me to get in touch with that higher love, which is ultimately inside of me, or the universe, or however you want to call it. I think deep romantic love is a step up somewhere on the ladder toward the highest love, because ultimately romantic love is still very conditional. But it can give you glimpses into unconditional love.

@vizual Hey, thank you for sharing this perspective, very interesting.

I also believe that it is possible to have brief moments of true Love (glimpses into unconditional love as you call them) in romantic relationships. I guess archieving that is already a very beautiful thing.

[Inliytened1]

4 hours ago, Michael Jackson said:

 

@vizual Hey, thank you for sharing this perspective, very interesting.

I also believe that it is possible to have brief moments of true Love (glimpses into unconditional love as you call them) in romantic relationships. I guess archieving that is already a very beautiful thing.

refreshing post.

@Michael Jackson @vizual I agree wholeheartedly with both of you.  Finite love is an aspect of a more broader Infinite Love.    WHen you love someone else with all of your Being it is actually Being/Love itself for itself.  Because others are aspects of yourself in a broader sense.   One other thing to mention is that If you have ever had a broken heart or suffered from a deeply broken heart you can feel this with all of your Being.  The suffering is intense and can actually be a form of spiritual growth, interestingly enough.   

[gettoefl]

only mom will take a bullet for the child

you won't

[jimwell]

I see it in a different way. I think everybody is capable of love and has loved many things.

But nobody (including me) has loved at the highest level - complete, unconditional love. Something limited is not capable of that. 

[Arthogaan]

I love my fiance unconditionally. She can do whatever she wants and it won't hurt me. She can move out. She can sleep with other man. It does not touch me because she is Me. It's like my other body. How could I be mad for second part of my body for doing what it feels like doing. Posession is main sickness in relationships.

Your partner does not owe you ANYTHING. No games. No strategies to get what you want from them.

 

This radicall video helped me change perspective some years ago:

https://youtu.be/TEkEq8YVAnA

 

 

Edited March 23, 2022 by Arthogaan

[Michael Jackson]

3 hours ago, Arthogaan said:

I love my fiance unconditionally. She can do whatever she wants and it won't hurt me. She can move out. She can sleep with other man. It does not touch me because she is Me. It's like my other body. How could I be mad for second part of my body for doing what it feels like doing. Posession is main sickness in relationships.

Your partner does not owe you ANYTHING. No games. No strategies to get what you want from them.

 

This radicall video helped me change perspective some years ago:

https://youtu.be/TEkEq8YVAnA

 

 

@Arthogaan Well that's a high quality relationship right there.. Does she also love you like that?

[Yarco]

I've felt the release of dopamine and other chemicals from interacting with people. And I feel a sense of loyalty to some of the people I have a history with or where the relationship is mutually beneficial. That's about it. 

When you get down to it, I think that's all most people mean when they say love. Otherwise it wouldn't be so easy to hurt people you supposedly love.

I still tell my SO I love her most days, mostly only reciprocally if she says it first. Why bother arguing semantics. 

Would I still feel the same if I had to sit next to her while she dies of cancer for years, bald and gradually getting more and more sickly and emaciated. Probably not. I'd still do it though, it's just part of the contract.

Would I give my life for her if it really came down to it, probably not. I think most people who claim they would, would have a change of heart when the situation happened. Talk is easier than action. Maybe I'd give my life for my kid from a utilitarian perspective, I've experienced about all I can out of life and they have so much more potential and unlived life.

[Preety_India]

I think a person should have some basic expectations in a relationship otherwise it loses meaning in practical life. 

 

[Michael Jackson]

36 minutes ago, Yarco said:

I've felt the release of dopamine and other chemicals from interacting with people. And I feel a sense of loyalty to some of the people I have a history with or where the relationship is mutually beneficial. That's about it. 

When you get down to it, I think that's all most people mean when they say love. Otherwise it wouldn't be so easy to hurt people you supposedly love.

I still tell my SO I love her most days, mostly only reciprocally if she says it first. Why bother arguing semantics. 

Would I still feel the same if I had to sit next to her while she dies of cancer for years, bald and gradually getting more and more sickly and emaciated. Probably not. I'd still do it though, it's just part of the contract.

Would I give my life for her if it really came down to it, probably not. I think most people who claim they would, would have a change of heart when the situation happened. Talk is easier than action. Maybe I'd give my life for my kid from a utilitarian perspective, I've experienced about all I can out of life and they have so much more potential and unlived life.

Hey @Yarco

Thank you for your honest perspective regarding that topic.

This is what most people live like. And from my POV this is simply not Love.

Actually, it has nothing more to do with actual Love, than the trashcan inside of your kitchen.

The great news is, actual Love, true Love, unconditional Love is something that truly exists. It is what we all long for deep down and anything less than that won't ever satisfy us in the long run.

Edited March 23, 2022 by Michael Jackson

[Preety_India]

4 minutes ago, Michael Jackson said:

The great news is, actual Love, true Love, unconditional Love is something that truly exists. It is what we all long for deep down and anything less than that won't ever satisfy us in the long run.

But not many people are ready for this? 

[Arthogaan]

On 23.03.2022 at 0:12 PM, Michael Jackson said:

@Arthogaan Well that's a high quality relationship right there.. Does she also love you like that?

Deep down yes. But she does not have as strong Self-Love and confidence as me so for example I know if I would do some crazy stuff it would feel dangerous for her and it would hurt her so I do not.

Also she has no desire to do such stuff herself. She once did sleep with other guy out of curiosity how would she feel and if I trully wouldn't mind. It was really fun talking about it and it made us stronger and love each other even more. She does not look to do that again.

So there is slight asymetry but I want to give her that safety of growth. She will reach the "unconditional" level some day I believe.

 

At the end of the day it's lack of unconditional Self-love that stops us from loving others unconditionally.

 

For example the belief that it means something bad about you if your partner does something other than you would like him to do.

Edited March 25, 2022 by Arthogaan

[Michael Jackson]

On 23.3.2022 at 3:15 PM, Arthogaan said:

For example the belief that it means something bad about you if your partner does something other than you would like him to do.

@Arthogaan Thank you for sharing your perspective. In that case true Love would mean setting your partner free to do whatever he / she feels like doing.

[Arthogaan]

Yes - full acceptance and support to explore the life. It kinda forms into that highest parental love. How would God love his people?

[Preety_India]

A person who expects unconditional love is a bad person deep down, sorry no other polite way to put it. 

True love is when that person wants a deep connection with you and harmonize with you, all other love is false love, a facade. 

Unconditional love is even worse. Practice what you preach. If you expect unconditional love from someone, your love is already conditional because you judge them for not showing unconditional love 

 

True love was never meant to be unconditional or else it can easily become a recipe for abuse. True love has one condition - true love, which means a true connection, without any agenda or pretense. 

 

[amanen]

I'm very lucky to have a girlfriend with whom I share genuine unconditional love with, mutually. I would die for her.

Haven't really deep down loved anybody else, nor would I say my family deep down ever loved me either, more like attachment on their part.

[Michael Jackson]

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

A person who expects unconditional love is a bad person deep down, sorry no other polite way to put it. 

@Preety_India There are no "bad people." Only confused people.

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

True love is when that person wants a deep connection with you and harmonize with you

No. This is wanting something from the other person, which is precisely not Love. True Love is, when you want the other person to be fully itself and want nothing in return.

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

If you expect unconditional love from someone, your love is already conditional because you judge them for not showing unconditional love 

Obviously.

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

True love was never meant to be IS unconditional

Fixed it for you. Love with conditions is simply not Love. Love is always unconditional.

 

4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

True love has one NO condition

Fixed.

[Michael Jackson]

4 hours ago, amanen said:

I'm very lucky to have a girlfriend with whom I share genuine unconditional love with, mutually. I would die for her.

Haven't really deep down loved anybody else, nor would I say my family deep down ever loved me either, more like attachment on their part.

@amanen Beautiful! I hope that I can at some day experience a relationship at an equal degree of depth<3