I'm just depressed

[Preety_India]

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If you don't have "it" then

• You feel constantly unmotivated 
• With age it gets worse 
• You feel agitated 
• You are not in touch with your masculine or feminine or you fall out of touch... It kinda remains incomplete 
• You don't feel grounded or attached. You don't have that home hearth feeling 
• You feel a thirst all the time 
• You have very strong needs for socialization in the absence. You will kill this need. 
• You feel constant hunger or a sense of hunger (dissatisfaction and Frustration) and you won't be able to put a finger on it 
• You might even start acting weird with age 
• In its presence you start focusing on life and living normally 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

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Again what happens in the absence of it? 

You feel disconnected and turn into a wandering drug addict that feeds on socializing with other wandering drug addicts. 

It's like you are an injured cat that has been dumped with other injured cats in a cat shelter that doesn't care about cats. So your condition only deteriorates. 

This is what happens when you don't have a healthy influence as company or a healthy role model. 

What is an injured cat going to receive from other unhealthy cats? It's going to contract diseases from other cats because they will pass on their misery to this cat. 

But the one solution is to take this unhealthy cat and place it in a good home for adoption and then it will have a good life. 

Similarly we need to find a healthy influence or role model who we absorb energies from 

                             

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Even the dog is scared, no? 

[Preety_India]

Irish and Swedish. 

 

 

 

 

Yes lady I need some kisses now. Kiss me please 

 

 

I think a rose would look really nice. 

 

 

Pink pink pink pink glitter 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 26, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

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I'm still a bit depressed. 

I took a cold shower right now to feel better. 

I have to keep hammering it into my head that I'm a Swedish woman who is into holistic healing. 

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I'm through numerous transformations currently both emotionally and psychologically. 

 

 

 

And I'm thinking of butterflies 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 26, 2022 by Preety_India

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I observe in myself that I'm getting more and more introverted and sinking into my shell. 

I feel like everything is over for me. 

I just don't want anything. 

I'll never understand my true feelings. 

Finally I just feel happy this way 

 

 

Edited March 26, 2022 by Preety_India

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I'm sick and tired of the world, humanity, people, things, romance, men, Relationships. I just don't know who I am anymore. 

I feel like I'm sitting in a graveyard. 

I don't know what life has in store for me

I'm going through excruciating mental pain. 

Everything feels like a joke. 

I feel like nobody ever gave a fuck about me.. 

Edited March 26, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

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As the realization sinks in that nobody gives a fuck about me, I have understood that I have to be extremely serious about my life. 

Don't give into cheap love that doesn't care. Don't act like a kid. Fucking grow up. 

Yea I act juvenile because of some unmet needs. And I need to grow the fuck up. 

I need to pull myself up by the bootstraps 

It has been very hard to say the least. 

 

               

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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There are two things here. One is my image and the other is me. 

My image here on this forum is spectacularly different from whom I actually am. 

I can't do much to reconcile the two. 

It's something that happened just naturally, I didn't do anything consciously. 

Most people assume that I must be some cheap shallow person. 

But I'm not the person who you think I am. I'll always be a mystery to people because the real me is good at hiding itself. 

The real me is buried under layers of drama, tension, defenses, issues, facades, and masks of protection that I wear because of my introversion. 

And that won't go away because I don't feel free around people. 

There is no point in blaming a person for doing what their brain tells them to do. 

I operate like any other human. I do what my brain tells me to. 

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

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Journal Maintenance work 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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desire: oneness, happiness, love, abundance

 

fear: fear itself, division, the opposite of happiness, scarcity

 

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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What prevents you from doing personal development work? 

Lethargy, unwillingness, lack of motivation, lack of direction, lack of discipline 

Work on blockages 

?How to organize, schedule and coordinate your effort in the right direction to achieve your goals? 

I cannot coordinate at all. 

Coordinate effort 

? How to cultivate different forms  of intelligence? 

My IQ is not very high in different areas. I need to improve this area. 

Improve intelligence 

? How to motivate myself to get results? 

This has been a huge problem. Lack of motivation. 

Motivate yourself harder 

 

?How to navigate through self help and filter information correctly? 

I never categorize information as per my needs. 

Customize and filter information to needs

 

? How to stop feeling blank and unmotivated? 

I often feel like I have no direction and I end up feeling blank. 

Have a sense of direction

 

?How to love myself? 

I don't push myself enough to love myself..

Push yourself to cultivate self love

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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(1) Compassion - Compassion wins over empathy in my book, because empathy biases us. For example we have a much easier time empathizing with someone who looks and behaves as we do, and a much more difficult time doing so with someone who has very different values or life experiences. Empathy can also lead to projecting your life experiences and beliefs on to others.

 

(2) Dignity - Both myself and others are worthy of self-respect. The primary purpose of social structures should be to make it possible for individuals and communities to live a dignified life.

 

(3) Contemplation - One's meaning making apparatus should be cultivated over a lifetime. Attitudes and beliefs should be scrutinized and deconstructed. This also includes cultivating one's ability to adopt new perspectives. Learning should be a lifelong process.

 

 

Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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Correct. 

The only difference between introverts and extroverts is where they get their kicks from. Extroverts get their fix from socialising, introverts from pursuing their own thoughts. There's no difference in creativity, intelligence, emotional intelligence, passion, focus, strength or any other measure.  In fact introverts can be quite social, they just don't get most of their pleasure from being social - introverts can be just as socially aware as extroverts.

Also, it's not one-size-fits-all. Introverts are not introverts in all situations, and likewise for extroverts. Maybe you're more extroverted with close friends and less so with acquaintances, or more introverted in a work situation than outside of it.

 

 

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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Work standing up! 

 

Give it a shot. For years I worked sitting down and was always tired, but I find when I work standing up I'm able to focus and be productive, so much that my thoughts even flow smoother. 

 

This may be a great strategy for kinesthetic learners. Stand up, get the blood flowing!

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Yup I did this same technique today. 

I stood up and did my work and I saw that I felt a bit more motivated than usual 

 

Another technique I use is to talk to myself. I know it sounds absurd.. 

 

But whenever I talk to myself I feel more energetic and connected and in a flow. Like I'm getting stuff done without losing focus 

 

So Yea try talking to yourself. 

 

 

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Journal entry template 

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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I used to focus hard on techniques, try very hard to get somewhere and such, but now understand that really the only thing that matters is that I'm alligned with my own being/inner nature/soul. I would suggest to just choose whatever resonates most with you in every moment, because that's the option that is most you. In my experience that seems to mean often to just let go of things. If you by doing that, line up your actions and thoughts with what feels good to you, you'll come more and more into allignment with what you truly are, and become the most expanded version of yourself that you could be. And what is more worthwhile than that? Well, I can't think of it.. If you do things from an energy of wanting to get somewhere, you'll be practising that energy, which is pretty much the oposite of what you want. That would be practising how you don't wish to feel as a means of reaching how you do wish to feel. hmm.. 

 

 

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

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Act first then from your actions you will find and customize a mental model you already know (or you will discover one along the way).

 

What must the first action be? To be generous with others, consistently.

 

What does generosity mean? In your case: give money to non-profit and see people you have avoided seeing (scarcity mindset applied to relationships).

 

It's okay if there is a back & forth pattern.

If you don't do this, you will be solving the scarcity mindset with a scarcity mindset and you will also probably never actually act because you will loose yourself in conceptualization and planning.

 

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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The key to living a good life and getting results is regular practice. That which you do with your mind (where you concentrate your mental resources) on a daily, weekly. 

The key to living a good life and getting results is regular practice. That which you do with your mind (where you concentrate your mental resources) on a daily, weekly, monthly basis.

Consistent practice leads to an elevated level of skillfulness in that particular area which then translates into powerful action and results. (Isn’t it the case that the results are what you ultimately want?)

Imagine if you practiced playing guitar (or meditation or any other skill) for 1 – 2 hours every day from age 5.

Imagine you started programming at age 3 and kept doing it regularly for 10, 20 years.

On the other hand, every practice be it good (like reading books) or bad (like watching TV) will lose its effect on your life without doing it consistently.

Hard work- regular practice of worthwhile skills with no immediate results (otherwise it would be fun, therefore - easy)

It is also important that you dedicate a distinct chunk of time to practice to give it the full focus (this is where the Time block planning technique comes into play [the idea of  Cal Newport] )

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Edited March 27, 2022 by Preety_India

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It's how you FEEL that matters. Don't control your speech to sound positive when inwards you are resisting it. The thought is a secondary manifestation of feeling. That's why it seems that we create with our thoughts, but thoughts only seem to have power exactly because they are completely powerless. Go direct to the Source, go to feeling, listen to feeling and you need not worry. 

You do not CONTROL your thoughts, you observe your thoughts and use feeling as a guide for whether or not to follow or believe them.  You can select a better feeling thought, only because selecting a better feeling thought is dropping a thought that feels bad. When we bulldoze over feeling we are manipulating and controlling to get a positive outcome, simply to avoid feeling. Feeling is the unconditional love that trumps the duality of positive or negative and needs not wait for an outcome. This is why you think you're being kind of OCD, you interpret this in a way that causes you to focus on a thought that "you" FEAR a negative outcome. This is just one more thought that feeling is telling you "Nope" to. 

 

 

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