Can Spiritual work heal my Anger Issues?

[Loving Radiance]

@gettoefl  You are right about the root cause.

[Leo Gura]

Mystical experiences of God's Love will certainly help with that.

Fundamentally you're angry because you didn't get the love you feel you deserved. Denial of love lead to hurt which lead to anger.

[JonasVE12]

Usually anger is also covering up another emotion. Such as shame for example. To release the anger, you have to also work on the underlying emotion that the anger is being reactive to. I had this one girlfriend that I was teasing and she became angry. Obviously, she took the tease too serious because she was insecure about that specific thing I was teasing her over. She had a wounded heart. It was just a playful innocent tease, but the underlying shame in her heart got triggered. As this sort of mechanism to not feel the truth of that emotion in herself, because she was avoiding it, she deflected and projected the shame as anger onto me. Anger is outwardly orientated energy that is very reactive in nature. The key is to turn the anger in on itself, feel emotions underlying the anger and then feel deeper and deeper into it until you can let it go. You can do this in daily sessions of 30 minutes where you actively bring up anger in your body, feel into the body, and then release it through the breath. As well as doing this whenever you feel anger. When you feel anger, you can release this the most powerful by orientating your attention into your somatic internal field and letting accepting energy flow to those regions you feel anger in. Doing this consistently will release anger and underlying emotions. But it is important to also work on the underlying emotions separately. 

A normal amount of anger is also healthy. To the first step to release it is to not make anger the demon. Many people feel shame and resistance towards anger. It has been told that anger is wrong. You become shamed in society when you feel anger. The first step is to allow yourself to feel anger fully, but inwardly, and not project it outwardly. 

[LSD-Rumi]

@Preety_India  Awareness alone is Curative. Allow yourself to experience the anger, notice how unpleasant and dirty it feels,let your mind experience the essence of the anger experience. This is not what you want, right? What you want is to be in peace and to be cheerful. Why do you allow yourself to be in the way? Cannot you handle the difficulties of life without being angry and annoied? You must train yourself to be in peace regardless, and to have a paragmatic approach to life. So instead of getting angry and anxious if a situation arises, train yourself to accept it and focus on finding a solution.

Anger is a very tricky emotion, it stems from resistance. The more you resist, the more angry you get.

[Preety_India]

12 hours ago, Kksd74628 said:

@Preety_India

Anger comes from non-acceptance of that you were hurt. It can also be way to express yourself when you feel like you haven't been understood, heard or accepted. I commented in the past to you that you need to the action NOW and accept your life like it is right NOW or then change it, but staying in the middle ground won't ever make the difference and that place is also called as hell. Stop adding more gasoline into fire by hating yourself, because if you don't love yourself then no one can fix the problem for you. Know that you are important and useful for your surrounding people and start seeing yourself in path to happiness rather than in trap of not progressing.

Use this community to share love instead of posting negative stuff here constantly, because otherwise this opportunity to grow just becomes act of poisoning others. I authentically want to help you and be on your side, but I won't participate to say nice things just to meet your desires to get "love" from others. I don't see any use for people everlastingly upping your mood via nice comments, because the mood will crash as fast as it went high for a moment. You need to generate the love you need from within you, because otherwise you will build - if you haven't built already - neediness of positive messages to you and that will never make you truly happy and you know it. You actually know what you should do and what could be the next step towards your dream life, but you just wont do it, because you fear unknownness more that you hate the present moment and that keeps you from progressing.

PS. I asked it in the past also, but why do you keep changing your profile picture daily and why do you have other female pictures in it, because that crashes your self-esteem even more, just saying.

With love -joNi-

I don't like people who end their post "with love" yet don't show even an iota of love in their post. The exact type of people I always avoid, the insincere ones. 

The one that triggers my anger the most is insincerity and lack of genuineness. I say straight to the face, instead of going behind the back. So anyone with insincerity is quickly detected in my mental system one way or another. 

Sometimes my anger is good, it's my system reacting to bullshit. It's my system alerting me to it thus protecting me from any further damage to my system, like a survival mechanism. That's why I honor anger, pure stage red survival in an unloving environment. 

I have avoided replying  to your posts because they generally lack sensitivity to my problems, it's like someone saying childish things to something really serious. I understand that you want to help me, but your post is not helpful at all. Maybe work on empathy training before you write to me or simply avoid writing to me since it is like adding fuel to my fire. I am a trauma victim and certain things you say can actually resurface my trauma, if I were in your place, I would be very careful about how I set the frame knowing beforehand what type of person I'm talking to, in this case it's a trauma victim like me. I have survived things you cannot imagine. 

Responding to the first part of your post - yea anger can come from being misunderstood yet I did not like your phrasing. I'm not in any middle ground, action does not happen overnight nor is it easy as you say it. I don't hate myself, I hate aspects of myself, that's a huge difference because I'm looking for self growth and I'm getting there inch by inch. I have progressed an awful lot if you have carefully followed me on this forum. You don't know me personally so you don't know shit about my journey. I haven't progressed fast enough yet my overall progress is massive if you have followed me all the way through from post number 1. It is silly to say that I am not progressing simply because I talk about my challenges. 

People come here to express their problems and seek solutions to those problems. That's the nature of this place, and if you can't accept that, then you are in the wrong place. This is not a dancing community of happy people. All kinds of traumatized, depressed, vulnerable people come here to seek help and work on their issues at their own pace. If you think you can't handle someone's problems or feel bad after reading it, then simply push the ignore button and don't read it. If someone is battling alcoholism and writing how they relapsed and document their struggle, I won't call it poisoning others but I'll respect their struggles. My private struggles are none of your business by the way, and if you don't like it, then avoid reading it, but of course people with problems are going to be here, some have worse problems than others, only the degree is different. 

I do share helpful things with people, that's how I show love, but I'm fully within my right to express my worries and thoughts too, that's what help is meant for. So don't try to block me getting help 

Responding to your second part of your post - I don't need your love nor your advice. Nobody is upping my mood, people simply give useful suggestions. So spare me your uppers, I don't need them. If someone says something positive, it's called community support to someone who needs it, so if I get community support, it's actually good for me, you don't need to give it if you don't feel like, but there are others who are supportive and understanding and they aren't doing anything wrong. I only feel better and if someone is surrounded by a supportive community, it actually helps their trauma, - learn basics of mental health before commenting to me. I don't come here for ego boosting so you don't need to support me. Others who are more matured and understanding, leave it to them. 

I don't fear any unknownNess, you don't know shit about me. 

My profile picture is the least of my concerns. I do it for aesthetic and artistic reasons. It has zero impact on my self esteem 

Stop speculating when you don't know me at all.

I'm tired of the tone you adopt while writing to me. I would suggest you to avoid future communication with me, because instead of being helpful, it turns my whole agenda into a personal debate and I don't appreciate that. Your response is not only insensitive, it's not helpful at all. It's harshly critical and most importantly not resonating with my personal truth at all, like I said you don't know me personally so a lot of what you are saying is just pure assumption/projection that doesn't resonate. 

Don't ask me anymore questions and I'm not interesting in debating you on here, so simply avoid me instead of creating deliberate misunderstanding and then feeding on it. 

 

 

[Breakingthewall]

@Preety_India in my experience, the only thing that can really help is spirituality. every problem that happens to you is ego. spirituality is transcending your ego. Since there has been a lack of love in your life (and mine, and almost everyone), you have configured a victimizing ego. I dont say it as something negative, it is something that happens if the right circumstances are given. if you transcend your ego, you will see that a victimizing ego or an ego of any other kind is the same thing, a mental construct. In any case, an uncomfortable, unbearable ego is a great help to motivate you to transcend it. if it were comfortable, you would never do it, and that in my opinion is something dramatic. having the opportunity to do so is a privilege. my advice: without psychedelics it is almost impossible to do it. And also you need determination and bravery.

You are in a jail and you have to scape. If you're desperate enough, and you  realize that being brave really isn't difficult when you see that not being so is more intimidating, you'll break down the walls.

Edited March 19, 2022 by Breakingthewall

[Juan]

4 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Mystical experiences of God's Love will certainly help with that.

Fundamentally you're angry because you didn't get the love you feel you deserved. Denial of love lead to hurt which lead to anger.

+1

[Consilience]

Haven't read through the post, but just answering the thread title. 

YES. Spiritual work has deeply healed my own anger issues. I used to be such an angry person, to the point where I'm pretty sure it was my anger issues that gave me my autoimmune condition. Or at least a large part of it. Getting a chronic disease was part of my wake up call that how I was operating was deeply unsustainable, damaging not only my external relationships, but my physical body at a cellular level. 

- Daily meditation

- Yoga

- Psychedelics 

- Emotional processing/circling/psycotheraputic practices

- Meditation retreats

These have all played a significant role with healing my anger. The most powerful have been daily meditation, meditation retreats, and psychedelics. Great part is, all three of these practices have many benefits beyond healing anger. 

[Michael Jackson]

@Preety_India Hi:)

I am not an expert on anger issues but I think spiritual work can help you with it. In spiritual work you can find a deep love for yourself and the world which is truly healing and transformative in so many ways. I hope you get better, wish you all the best <3

[Preety_India]

@Juan yes I agree with Leo. 

15 minutes ago, Consilience said:

Haven't read through the post, but just answering the thread title. 

YES. Spiritual work has deeply healed my own anger issues. I used to be such an angry person, to the point where I'm pretty sure it was my anger issues that gave me my autoimmune condition. Or at least a large part of it. Getting a chronic disease was part of my wake up call that how I was operating was deeply unsustainable, damaging not only my external relationships, but my physical body at a cellular level. 

- Daily meditation

- Yoga

- Psychedelics 

- Emotional processing/circling/psycotheraputic practices

- Meditation retreats

These have all played a significant role with healing my anger. The most powerful have been daily meditation, meditation retreats, and psychedelics. Great part is, all three of these practices have many benefits beyond healing anger. 

Thank you. 

1 minute ago, Michael Jackson said:

@Preety_India Hi:)

I am not an expert on anger issues but I think spiritual work can help you with it. In spiritual work you can find a deep love for yourself and the world which is truly healing and transformative in so many ways. I hope you get better, wish you all the best <3

Thank you. That's awesome 

[Tristan12]

6 hours ago, Loving Radiance said:

7 hours ago, gettoefl said:

anger is the belief, the world has wronged me and i need to assert myself and right that wrong

contemplate this

then ask has an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth ever worked to bring harmony trust peace

Anger doesn't respond to rationality. It just wants to be seen and felt.

Exactly

[vizual]

I only have the potential to become angry when my life isn’t going well and I’m frustrated by my circumstances. The frustration starts building and wants to unleash itself through anger. The root cause, in my case, is that I wasn’t heading in the right direction in my life. The things that triggered my anger were really only me expressing my own frustrations with my life. Even when it seems very justified to be angry in those particular circumstances. The mind can play tricks on you like that.

 So really I would say; try to find your root cause. There’s possibly something boiling inside of you which needs to be addressed

[Matt23]

Try learning and practicing to just "let it go".   First feel the emotions and sensations in your body (separately from the thoughts and stories etc. in your mind).  Just focus on the bodily sensations.  And don't try to suppress them, but try instead to feel them fully.  Let them all out (in yourself with awareness, rather than expressing unhinged). 

Then as you get more used to this, you might find they dissipate more and more.  Then you can even try just consciously letting them go.  As a choice.

This process is like trying to first transcend the anger, stories, and feelings buy becoming aware of them and not caught in them.  Then comes the part about being able to just observe them, which leads to you realizing you can let them go (or not).  

[Preety_India]

7 hours ago, JonasVE12 said:

Usually anger is also covering up another emotion. Such as shame for example. To release the anger, you have to also work on the underlying emotion that the anger is being reactive to. I had this one girlfriend that I was teasing and she became angry. Obviously, she took the tease too serious because she was insecure about that specific thing I was teasing her over. She had a wounded heart. It was just a playful innocent tease, but the underlying shame in her heart got triggered. As this sort of mechanism to not feel the truth of that emotion in herself, because she was avoiding it, she deflected and projected the shame as anger onto me. Anger is outwardly orientated energy that is very reactive in nature. The key is to turn the anger in on itself, feel emotions underlying the anger and then feel deeper and deeper into it until you can let it go. You can do this in daily sessions of 30 minutes where you actively bring up anger in your body, feel into the body, and then release it through the breath. As well as doing this whenever you feel anger. When you feel anger, you can release this the most powerful by orientating your attention into your somatic internal field and letting accepting energy flow to those regions you feel anger in. Doing this consistently will release anger and underlying emotions. But it is important to also work on the underlying emotions separately. 

A normal amount of anger is also healthy. To the first step to release it is to not make anger the demon. Many people feel shame and resistance towards anger. It has been told that anger is wrong. You become shamed in society when you feel anger. The first step is to allow yourself to feel anger fully, but inwardly, and not project it outwardly. 

Your answers are helping me a lot. 

[Kksd74628]

@Preety_India

Didn't expect that kind of welcome. I admit that I can't in any way know what you have been faced, but problem in communicating through chatting is that I can't show my real facial expressions and feelings through only words. Of course I could soften everything that I say, but that seems to cut the message narrow. My tone in writing that was positive, but for some reason you took it as negative. That is not problem in me or you, but in communication and understanding. Sometimes we understand each others wrongly and I am sorry, if that made you more sad, because that was certainly not my true intention.

If everything that I said was wrong and hurtful then I can't say anything, because I only made conclusions from what I have seen you doing here as long as I have been here. Of course I can't read all your 33k posts and if that is needed to understand you then maybe I will never understand and we can move on from that. Still, if you say that understanding you needs reading 33k posts then I would suggest you learning basic self-expression. Don't suppose that my intention is to make you feel bad, because from that everything can be taken as negative and evil. I answer here to people to help them and why would I purposely make others feel bad.

My way of communicating is through logic and I have seen that this method does not work for everyone and most people aren't ready to take critisism as you said and that is one problem in what I truly are. Should I change what I am to meet some people where they are? I don't know, because at least when I - with self-bias of course - read my answers I don't see anything too wrong and hateful there. Maybe I could phrase things differently, but as I said I am not writing poem here, but just expressing what comes to my mind and what feels right to say in every precise moment. I will do many mistakes, but stoning me, because of my opinion is kind of radical, if you ask me.

[Preety_India]

54 minutes ago, Kksd74628 said:

@Preety_India

Didn't expect that kind of welcome. I admit that I can't in any way know what you have been faced, but problem in communicating through chatting is that I can't show my real facial expressions and feelings through only words. Of course I could soften everything that I say, but that seems to cut the message narrow. My tone in writing that was positive, but for some reason you took it as negative. That is not problem in me or you, but in communication and understanding. Sometimes we understand each others wrongly and I am sorry, if that made you more sad, because that was certainly not my true intention.

If everything that I said was wrong and hurtful then I can't say anything, because I only made conclusions from what I have seen you doing here as long as I have been here. Of course I can't read all your 33k posts and if that is needed to understand you then maybe I will never understand and we can move on from that. Still, if you say that understanding you needs reading 33k posts then I would suggest you learning basic self-expression. Don't suppose that my intention is to make you feel bad, because from that everything can be taken as negative and evil. I answer here to people to help them and why would I purposely make others feel bad.

My way of communicating is through logic and I have seen that this method does not work for everyone and most people aren't ready to take critisism as you said and that is one problem in what I truly are. Should I change what I am to meet some people where they are? I don't know, because at least when I - with self-bias of course - read my answers I don't see anything too wrong and hateful there. Maybe I could phrase things differently, but as I said I am not writing poem here, but just expressing what comes to my mind and what feels right to say in every precise moment. I will do many mistakes, but stoning me, because of my opinion is kind of radical, if you ask me.

You just don't get it and that's fine. We are on opposite sides and we won't understand each other. Your opinion is just an opinion at the end of the day, not my reality. I'll cut here. 

 

You're simply judging me by my posts at the end of the day and applying your perception to it.. 

You don't know me in real life so try not to come across like you know everything about me. I mean stop being so judgemental on my life,yikes 

You are simply dragging me into a debate that is going nowhere. Meanwhile I'm looking for something more productive and meaningful to me. 

You can always keep your opinions to yourself especially when they aren't helping me. 

When I'm constantly telling you that you aren't helping me, why are you still trying to dominate the narrative. I didn't start the thread for your commentary on my life, look at how others answer, they focus on the topic at hand. I didn't ask for personal commentary jesus. What exactly are you achieving by drawing me into a debate of disagreements, it's not going anywhere. Like I said your perspective isn't helping me, so for me it's practically useless, just words on a screen that don't matter to me. I'm looking for answers to my question and not an analysis on my life. So why don't you just let it go and quit? 

And others aren't writing poems. They are writing helpful suggestions. 

Your Posts are judgemental and don't resonate with what I'm looking for. You can say opinions but your silly little pesky judgements on me are not what I'm looking for. If you can't help someone, then just don't bother at all.. This is the kind of stubbornness I don't appreciate. 

The way you are constructing the frame here is coming across as unempathetic, non - resonating and lacking in true understanding and very negative. It's like I'm telling people that my medical issue is because of my poor diet and you are convincing me that it's because of my mind. It's unhelpful when you have zero clue about who I am.. So maybe when a person tells you that they aren't finding your comment helpful, then the better thing is to avoid? 

Edited March 20, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

@Kksd74628 I'm going to have to ask you to stop responding to me as a request because whatever you're saying is putting me in a dark negative mood and rather than helping, it's making me feel blamed. It's toxic. 

 

I'll avoid you on the forum and I'll expect you to do the same. 

 

Edited March 20, 2022 by Preety_India

[Breakingthewall]

@Preety_India that is because @Kksd74628 has a touch of condescending superiority that could provoque an anger attack to Buda ?. But same time he use to do good points

Edited March 20, 2022 by Breakingthewall

[Preety_India]

2 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

@Preety_India that is because @Kksd74628 has a touch of condescending superiority that could provoque an anger attack to Buda ?

There is some kind of thinly veiled personal attacks, the underhanded type, it's defeating rather than constructive. There is a certain Condescending kind of meanness in all of his  posts directed at me, something that is hurting rather than healing 

 

Edited March 20, 2022 by Preety_India

[axiom]

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Edited March 20, 2022 by axiom