A true spiritual partner to me

[Preety_India]

Not a player. 

 

[Preety_India]

A cool calm collected guy who would really love me for who I am. 

Deep down I'm just a gentle sweet person although on the outside I appear like an egotistical hot tempered person. 

Maybe I always attract men who always want to play with me. 

 

[Preety_India]

I'm very shy and sensitive. 

 

[Preety_India]

I want someone who will have a very deep intimacy with me. 

 

[Preety_India]

I'm kinda tired. 

 

[Preety_India]

I cried so many tears. 

[Preety_India]

A guy who will not make it difficult for me to talk to him (because I'm already such a bad introvert, I hardly open up) 

 

[Preety_India]

I feel like a lost puppy. I feel sad. 

 

 

I cannot stand coldness

 

I cannot stand someone not talking to me. I feel so alone. 

I'm crying again. I feel so hurt whenever someone acts cold with me. 

It hurts like a dagger. 

I don't want to be with men who don't allow any intimacy or openness 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I'm sorry I love you. 

[Preety_India]

I suffer horrible levels of abandonment anxiety. 

I want a secure attachment. 

Not an insecure feeling. Uncertainty of emotion. I don't like it 

And not a withdrawing attachment. 

 

[Preety_India]

This makes me happy right now. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

[Preety_India]

People always want a woman to sacrifice everything she got even to the point of hurt. 

 

 

That I should have no agency or power whatsoever just by the default condition of being a woman yet you should be perfectly entitled to every agency and Power you need. 

 

Sometimes I also feel like the notions of femininity tend to fool women rather than benefit them. 

 

Because you didn't have to deal with shit, maybe that's why, probably. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 18, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

That I should have no agency or power whatsoever just by the default condition of being a woman yet you should be perfectly entitled to every agency and Power you need. 

 

[Preety_India]

Sometimes I also feel like the notions of femininity tend to fool women rather than benefit them. 

[Preety_India]

Because you didn't have to deal with shit, maybe that's why, probably. 

 

[Preety_India]

I want a deeply committed spiritual relationship. 

Till then I'll continue in solitude mode. 

 

[Preety_India]

Now I'll completely collapse into hermit mode.. 

What I want is a man who would love me spiritually. 

 

[Preety_India]

He was everything to me. 

 

But I'll always remember him and everything he taught me indirectly. 

I thought he was my soulmate. 

 

[Preety_India]

Basically it comes down to lack of loyalty. 

People who are truly loyal they stick through thick and thin