How to become more manly?

[Vercingetorix]

I feel I'm too much connected to my feminine side that I lost touch with the male, the doer, the gambler, the one who takes actions, the one who fights. and as a result of that I can't find the partner i want -the feminine girl type that I'm attracted to to. I've read in the fast the way of the superior man And I'm gonna start reading it again now - but if you have any advice that helped with that please share.

let's make me man again.

[SamC]

This will sound super weird and will probably irritate but the way to solve this is to integrate more of your femininity.

I struggled with the same thing before but then realized that I didn't resist my masculinity, I resited my femininity. The reason why I was " feminine" was because I had shadow feminine elements which acted out subconsciously. I didn't control it. Remember, what you push down becomes stronger.

I realized that the reason why I wasn't masculine and cared what other people tbought of me was because I didn't trust in myself, which is a femenine quality. I  needed to submit, to myself.. and because myself is God I needed to submit and trust in God/ the universe.

I realized all this by taking LSD but you could probably go other ways. When you realize that you are good enough to be trusted - your masculinity will flower. 

Your problem is not your lack of masculinity, your lack of directon and conciousness.. its your lack of trust in that direction. It's your lack of trust in the feminine... and if you can't trust the feminine, the feminine can't trust you and you are seperated from the creation - aka Love. Your love for a feminine woman is a projection of your inner femenine side that wants to be integrated.

[StarStruck]

There is really no out of the box solution for this. For some they have to get in touch with their inner femininity so it will spark their inner masculinity.... And for some it is that they are too feminine and they need to spark their masculinity.

In general you want to balance your inner femininity and masculinity and become a whole person and when you meet a feminine girl, she will polarize you and you will become masculinity through your instincts.

It is really about listening to your instincts. Do no fap, if you can't feel your masculine instincts. This work is about getting in touch with your body.

Edited March 14, 2022 by StarStruck

[PurpleTree]

4 hours ago, SamC said:

This will sound super weird and will probably irritate but the way to solve this is to integrate more of your femininity.

I struggled with the same thing before but then realized that I didn't resist my masculinity, I resited my femininity. The reason why I was " feminine" was because I had shadow feminine elements which acted out subconsciously. I didn't control it. Remember, what you push down becomes stronger.

I realized that the reason why I wasn't masculine and cared what other people tbought of me was because I didn't trust in myself, which is a femenine quality. I  needed to submit, to myself.. and because myself is God I needed to submit and trust in God/ the universe.

I realized all this by taking LSD but you could probably go other ways. When you realize that you are good enough to be trusted - your masculinity will flower. 

Your problem is not your lack of masculinity, your lack of directon and conciousness.. its your lack of trust in that direction. It's your lack of trust in the feminine... and if you can't trust the feminine, the feminine can't trust you and you are seperated from the creation - aka Love. Your love for a feminine woman is a projection of your inner femenine side that wants to be integrated.

interesting theory/idea

[SamC]

9 minutes ago, PurpleTree said:

interesting theory/idea

It's a lot more than an idea, it is a truth. You can discover it yourself from direct experience.

[PurpleTree]

1 minute ago, SamC said:

It's a lot more than an idea, it is a truth. You can discover it yourself from direct experience.

i don't really like the word "truth" but ok

how can i discover it

[SamC]

29 minutes ago, PurpleTree said:

i don't really like the word "truth" but ok

how can i discover it

@PurpleTree Psychedelics is the easiest way but otherwise deep contemplation, meditation and stuff in that mannor. Anima integration/ possesion is another topic to dive into.

Taking LSD healed me and changed my life.  Be really fucking careful tho and take in it in the right setting and at a low dose. It can also fuck you up haaard.

I know what you mean by not liking the wording but it litterly is the case. Its possible to to get direct experience of the fact that what holds you back is your hatred and distrust for your own femine side ( for yourself) I'm not saying its the case for everyone.. I'm saying its the case if you feel like you're to feminine and repell girls over and over and over again and struggle witth putting the femenine on a pedestal. You don't want to submit to who you are and if you don't do that - no woman will submit to you.

If you want me to explain more, shoot me a Pm. Would be glad to help.

Edited March 14, 2022 by SamC

[Terell Kirby]

@Vercingetorix Having a life purpose is a conscious, healthy way to develop your masculinity.

Masculine drive is fueled by drive, mission, purpose and breaking through barriers and challenges. Being motivated by juicy vision / life purpose will spill into other areas in your life .. women find this quality very attractive in men as well .. not to mention, it is very authentic.

Edited March 14, 2022 by Terell Kirby

[JonasVE12]

Masculinity is your ability to step into tension and be grounded in tension. Look at navy seals, firemen, police men, or men who are good with women. Look how grounded they are in their body. They are in control, completely vulnerable, yet containing and penetrating the world through their level of emotional embodiment. 

Becoming masculine is all about developing your grounding ability in relationship to tension. Those examples above, if you visualize their energy for a bit, you can start to feel the contrast with your own internal energy and see the gap in masculine grounding ability. 

Walk a bit through the city, and feel your level of contraction in relationship to the world around you. How penetrative are you with your energy? 
How expansive are you? Is your self-expression limited? How reactive are you to your external environment and also to your internal one; the emotions and thoughts about yourself. Do you have a lot of fear, shame and apathy?

Are you taking any responsibility? Are you making decisions? Are you procrastinating and lazy? What is your long term vision? Do you always want to be contained instead of being your own container? 

Your masculine is only going to develop through challenge and serious embodiment work. It is uncomfortable for sure. Especially if you lack solid grounding. It takes time to build that. You will need to walk a path where you are being confronted with all the uncomfortable stuff that will build you over time. 

Get out there, be challenged, seek challenge. Seek confrontation, spend time in nature, walk around the city without shirt and shoes,  become primal again. Do martial arts, build a masculine physique, stop masturbating and half-assing things. Go to men retreats such as awakened masculinity. Face your social fears, face social rejection, confront your emotions, start to build a conscious relationship with your body where you release tension systematically, start to model your reality energetically and then bring it down into the physical body, spend time with other men, get good at game and socialization. 

Are you taking responsibility in fixing your diet, doing your routines, sticking with right habits, focussing on money stuff, doing daily chores? Are you sticking to a right sleeping schedule? Are you focussing on a deeper purpose in terms of career? 

So much stuff you can do man, but the key is: Face tension, gain experience, get out there, stop jacking off, and commit fully.

Embodiment is what you are after and it comes after a lot of experience in the physical world where you are confronting emotions, both internal from childhood such as fear and shame for example, but also emotions that external reality pushes onto you where you have to be able to contain them and ground them, such as being physically confronted by dominant aggressive males for example. 

If you want a feminine women, you need to be able to contain her. Your energy needs to feel solid, where the flow of your consciousness is going down into the earth, because you feel stable and powerful, ready for anything. This is all the result of a lot of experience. A feminine woman has the deepest desire to be contained in a relationship, to feel safe to express her feminine energy. 

Make it your life purpose to connect to this masculine energy, and once you do, you can drop this intention because you are embodied. This karma is then gone away from your identity and you make place for other purpose. 

Some practices to start:

• Join a gym, build strength
• Eat healthy
• Do Martial arts, jiu jitsu, muay thai, mma, ....
• Wake up early, take a cold shower
• Walk in nature barefoot, expose your body to the world, leave t shirt home
• Social exposure: Become comfortable facing rejection. Face rejection and let go of attachment to validation.
• Letting go / releasing practices: Hypnosis, meditation, body awareness, sedona/lester levenson/ hawkins
• Approach women
• Do oshos dynamic meditation early in the morning in a public park. 
• Find a community of like minded men: The Fearless man on youtube for example.
• Go to workshops and retreats for men: Awakened masculinity, fearless man workshops, ....
• Psychedelics: Letting go of your self-identity
• Full body awareness when outdoors: relaxation and belly breathing
• Look people in the eyes when you walk down the street, feel the tension. Penetrate people with your energy. No half-assing

These things have the aim to release feelings that are currently blocking your natural flow of masculine energy. When done as daily routines, with full commitment, these things will adapt your nervous system over the months and years and there comes a point of permanent embodiment where these shifts in feeling that result from the practices, form a natural part of your identity. Things are effortless and expansive then. You have total freedom. You can then start to let go of some of the practices if you wish. You have a lot more dynamic range in the things you can do because you are not contracted by blockages any more. Your feminine and masculine become more synergistic and harmonize, and you can bounce between them whenever you wish to. 

And the most important thing... Stop compulsive consumption of theory. And let go of needing to change over night. Change never happens as a result of one thing you do. It is compounded effect over time that is what changes you, just as building muscles will change the body. Tension and resistance will change your masculine embodiment level. And it is a proces that works over time. 1% each day. Take action and let go of needing to understand everything, needing to find the big answer, the next book that contains all the answers etc. Do the practices that are causing you to feel resistance, and do them rigorously with a david goggins mentality. 

Edited March 15, 2022 by JonasVE12