How to deal with unlived life

[Ulax]

I've been trying desperately for the past decade to change my life through various techniques, and journeys - including actualized.org, therapy, meditations, pick up, challenging myself.

However, I feel so much like I've missed out on life. I wanted so badly to be free of my mental chains so as to live freely during this time. And it is painful to think about all the things I missed out on.

How do you guys recommend I cope with this?

I guess grief, self-contempt, and hopelessness are the main things I resonate with currently.

Thanks in advance

[Yarco]

Depends on what you feel like you missed out on, and if you can make it up.

I felt like I missed out on having multiple sexual partners and "sowing my wild oats" because my fiancée at the time was the only person I'd ever slept with. So I broke up with her and slept with someone else. It's painful and scary to do, but I knew that if I didn't, it'd be gnawing at the back of my mind for the rest of my life until I did. I was obsessed every day with wondering what it'd be like to sleep with someone else and how different it would feel, until I did it.

I hated the career path I had chosen (or allowed my parents to choose for me), so I changed it.

The simplest solution is just to go live your life and make up for the stuff you missed. It's usually much faster than trying to grieve for what you missed out on instead. Don't settle and cope. Just go take what you want.  Even if it temporarily throws your life into chaos to get it. Otherwise you may never stop grieving.

Even if you're 40 years old and feel like you missed out on the club and bar scene, just go to the club. If you want to start a band, start a band. If you want to write a book, write a book. There aren't many things that you can't make up for.

Edited March 8, 2022 by Yarco

[itachi uchiha]

@Ulax u need to work on self help materials for 5 years to see some amazing results. from beginning to 5 years u will be in a maze, totally confused, mindfucked, stuck etc like u r now. but after 5 years something clicks and everything fall into place and u will become an extra ordinary human. doing selfhelp will be one of the most satisfying thing inyour life. u will be extra ordinary. u will get mind blowing results. so dont quit. never quit . develop preseverence and patience

[Ulax]

1 hour ago, itachi uchiha said:

@Ulax u need to work on self help materials for 5 years to see some amazing results. from beginning to 5 years u will be in a maze, totally confused, mindfucked, stuck etc like u r now. but after 5 years something clicks and everything fall into place and u will become an extra ordinary human. doing selfhelp will be one of the most satisfying thing inyour life. u will be extra ordinary. u will get mind blowing results. so dont quit. never quit . develop preseverence and patience

I've been working on it for 7 years now lol

[itachi uchiha]

@Ulax wtf

 

So what exactly is your problem.can u be more specific

[Ulax]

@itachi uchiha PTSD dude. I suppose the recommendations I was seeking were more emotional ones.

[aurum]

6 hours ago, Ulax said:

And it is painful to think about all the things I missed out on.

What exactly do you feel you missed out on? And why can’t you do it now?

[itachi uchiha]

@Ulax so u want to cure your emotional problems.ptsd = emotional problem right

[Preety_India]

@Ulax what is it that you missed out on? 

[Ulax]

@itachi uchiha Yes, but that is not what I want help with on this post

[itachi uchiha]

@Ulax so what do u  want to have help with

[Ulax]

@Preety_India Just living a fun, free youth. Having relationships, both sexual and plutonic. Being able to study.

[Preety_India]

@Ulax why don't you do it then? 

[itachi uchiha]

@Ulax practcie kriya yoga.kriya yoga gives amazing intoxicating states/ecstacy/bliss for hours.i had the best moments of my life from kriya yoga.no amount of  money and woman will make u happy like kriya yoga

[Ulax]

@itachi uchiha Dealing with my unlived life

[Ulax]

@itachi uchiha Thanks. I'll give it a go. What resource would you recommend I learn it from?

[itachi uchiha]

@Ulax do u wanna try kriya yoga.it is the answer to your problem

[Ulax]

@itachi uchiha Yes, im open to it

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0S93-iwxGmI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l00vX5cUaCA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGH6sdODcOw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-2K1xdwIu4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8wl-pSfMdY

Edited March 8, 2022 by Raze

[Theperciever]

@Ulax have you done much self-forgiveness work? if not I recommend trying this