Night Game - What are good openers?

[ValiantSalvatore]

Today some clubs are opening again and I am going out with some friends. I still have the biggest issue with just approaching, I usually have a lot to a decent amount of fun when going out. I have the biggest issues with approaching and knowing what to say. I did not approach a lot of women yet approx 10 or as I am selective as well as it's just not easy. 

What can I say as an opener? When I sort of free flow and associate I just said.

• hey you look cute, can I grab your number?
• hey want to dance? 

That is quite generic I know more polarazing openers, yet I have issues being nudged into doing it as well as I never tried them as they are out of a book for example. I'll lost my notes these are out of a book.

• Who do you think is the stronger gender men or women?
• Who cheats more men or women?
• Who are better liars men or women?
• Who is more dominant in relationships men or women?
• Would you rather not have sex for one year or not use your phone for one year?
• Do strong men still exist?

I have issues coming up with stuff on my own for example I would say.

• How come most men are scared of leading are women the better leaders?
• What are your thoughts about feminine guys do they turn you on?
• Would you ever date a serial killer?
• Pick 3 people in the club who would you fuck, kill or marry?
• What is a drink no man should ever order?
• Would you attend a gay marriage?
• I like your black dress.
• I like XXX, what was the worst compliment you ever received?
• What do you think about unsocial guys?

Again, my question is what are good openers? What worked for you?

Note: The ones out of the book are indirect openers that tend to be polarazing and get the group engaged/befriend etc. These are apparently for sets with 3-4+ girls and mixed groups.

 

Edited March 5, 2022 by ValiantSalvatore

[something_else]

I think in clubs simple is better. There’s a good chance the girl won’t hear you first time and it gets super awkward to repeat complicated openers a few times

I don’t think the actual content of the opener matters as much as your energy when you deliver it

I’d pick something simple and just try it over and over. Or you could open with the thing about the girl that stands out to you the most. Observe whatever it is that stands out about her and point it out with high energy

[ValiantSalvatore]

@something_else Yeah that is what I also thought observational openers could work the best for me. These openers are supposed to work for bars and clubs. What summarized.

What are simple openers to you? I'd like to focus on just opening first and learning that for a while and then move on.

Edited March 5, 2022 by ValiantSalvatore

[Federico del pueblo]

1 hour ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

Again, my question is what are good openers? What worked for you?

Whatever is the truth of the moment.

"You seemed like a cool girl, so I wanted to say hi"

 

Canned openers:

"You look like cool people, so I wanted to come by for a moment"

"Hey, you guys look like fun together"

"Excuse me, you just look really intriguing, so I wanted to say hi"

"Hey, I'm [name], I wanted to meet you, you seemed cute/fun"

"You look like trouble in the most adorable way (I've seen this evening)"

"You guys look really adorable together"

"You guys look really adorable together, you...(the girl you like) look a little bit like trouble....but I'll deal with it"

"That was just the most dismissive look you gave me there....so I had to come and talk to you"

(pretending like you know them)

"Hi girls, sorry I'm late. I missed the bus..." (Then keep pretending, play with it)

"Hey, you're the cutest girl in a red dress I've seen in the last 5 minutes :P" 

 

Also be aware of how your mind might trick you.

If you're anxious you'll get thoughts like "but I don't know...this opener seems weird in this situation" "nah...this opener doesn't fit right now" "nah... that's not a good opener" and so on. Your mind will do anything to stop you from doing the feared thing.

Also it is much more about the delivery than the exact content of the line.

If you want to use a very cocky opener ("which on of you girls thinks she could handle all of this (pointing with your thumbs to yourself)") but you seem shy and insecure it doesn't work.

This doesn't mean that the opener doesn't work, your delivery didn't work.

And also keep in mind that you're not trying to seduce them with your opener. The goal of the opener is to get past the opener. It doesn't have to be amazing. What you do after the opener and how you calibrate is much more important.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Federico del pueblo Thanks a lot!. I'll copy this and modify it as well as use the lines that already fit within my personality or I like. 

Yeah I am a bit afraid of the follow up as well as how fast physical escalation can work. I'll just focus on the opener just opening and seeing IOT's is good enough for starters.

Also all of these are sort of the supercategory of observational openers. Thanks again. I'll see what will happen and works for me.

Edited March 5, 2022 by ValiantSalvatore

[Ulax]

Hey, I'm *INSERT NAME*

[Leo Gura]

Don't waste time trying to invent clever openers. The opener is irrelevant.

"Hey! Stop. I wanted to meet you real quick. What's your name?" is basically your universal opener.

The words of your opener is not what gets you the girl.

Observational openers tend to work best. For example: "Hey, girl in the black dress. I wanted to meet you real quick."

[vindicated erudite]

3 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

• Who do you think is the stronger gender men or women?
• Who cheats more men or women?
• Who are better liars men or women?
• Who is more dominant in relationships men or women?
• Would you rather not have sex for one year or not use your phone for one year?
• Do strong men still exist?

3 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

• How come most men are scared of leading are women the better leaders?
• What are your thoughts about feminine guys do they turn you on?
• Would you ever date a serial killer?
• Pick 3 people in the club who would you fuck, kill or marry?
• What is a drink no man should ever order?
• Would you attend a gay marriage?
• I like XXX, what was the worst compliment you ever received?
• What do you think about unsocial guys?

These are bad openers.

Let's say you are in a club and you want to approach a girl you can say something like:

"Hey, I think you look stunning. Are you enjoying yourself?"

"Excuse me, I saw you dancing over there and wanted to say hi, what's your name?"

If you're at the bar you can say something like:

"Excuse me, I don't know what drink to get do you have any recommendations?"

Just don't overdo it and don't get stuck in your head.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Leo Gura Thanks a lot also! How do you follow up though? Asking about interests what she's doing here and then going for number asking for haning-out inside the club or if they want to join us and staying till the set closes? 

I re-watched your part 2 of getting laid series and there was a lot of info. I do have to re-watch it again though and then take action. I do think outergame is the bigger issue than my inner game currently.
---
@vindicated erudite I'll add the technical nuance, this is for opening an entire set of more than 3-4+ girls and mixed groups IIRC. I did not mention that. That is my bad. A direct opener I would use what you wrote, yet I will open larger sets also. I really like attention so the indirect openers are for larger sets. My own openers are bad I admit etc. etc. but okay.

 

Edited March 5, 2022 by ValiantSalvatore

[vindicated erudite]

1 minute ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

@vindicated erudite I'll add the technical nuance, this is for opening an entire set of more than 3-4+ girls I did not mention that. That is my bad. A direct opener I would use what you wrote, yet I will open larger sets also. I really like attention so the indirect openers are for larger sets. My own openers are bad I admit etc. etc. but okay.

If you're approaching more than one girl then it does change a lot. I would recommend bringing a group of friends to make it easier.

 

[ValiantSalvatore]

@vindicated erudite Yeah I am with friends, I like to connect people so I don't really care. I just need a fun topic. 

[vindicated erudite]

Just now, ValiantSalvatore said:

@vindicated erudite Yeah I am with friends, I like to connect people so I don't really care. I just need a fun topic. 

Find a way to get the girls to talk about themselves and drop-in conversation points about yourself if it gets dry to keep the ball rolling.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@vindicated erudite Thanks I'll see what I can free flow associate with. And inquire about themselves.

[PurpleTree]

you look her in the eyes and kiss kiss

 

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

@Leo Gura Thanks a lot also! How do you follow up though? Asking about interests what she's doing here

The answer to that question is the heart of game. The answer cannot be told to you, you must learn it by doing it.

There isn't any algorithmic way to follow up. You must be so in the zone that you say whatever comes to your mind and amuses you, and whatever matches your sexual intent towards the girl you are speaking to. In other words, your follow-up cannot be some canned lines, it must be genuine and improvisational.

Usually the best follow-up is not interview style questions but just fun shit-talking.

Here's an example:

A girl is walking out of the restroom at the club. I tap her on the shoulder, smile, and say, "I love you." She gives me a face like she is turned off. I calibrate to that and say, "Hey, come here a second. Did you just take a giant shit in there? That turns me on. You should go back in there and take a video of yourself taking a giant shit and send it to me." I say this in way where it's obvious I'm teasing her. Her face changes, now she's interested in talking to me. So I pull her in physically and talk with her about other random stupid shit. This is not a routine I run. This is a spontaneous response generated on-the-fly to a particular situation.

Basically, your conversations have to be fun and random. Nothing serious. Nothing logical. Mostly it's flirting and shit-talk.

Your follow up has to be congruent with how you feel in the moment and your intent towards her. For example, if I see a girl I really like, I might just walk up to her, take her by the hand, and say, "OMG, you are fucking adorable. Come here..." and give her a genuine hug. Then stare in her eyes and hold her by the waist.  This is not done as some "routine" or planned line. It's a fully authentic expression of my attraction towards her, specifically her, in that moment. It's calibrated to her and to my own internal state. I am also reading her face and body to gauge how open she is to me. If she recoils, I will back off. If she is open then I will escalate further. The verbals comes spontaneously, not pre-meditated.

Your follow ups have to be improvisational. This is the hardest and most important part of game to learn. You learn it by lots of trail and error.

A good way to practice this is to open with a very simple opener and then force yourself not to ask her any questions and instead make statements about her. Talk to her without needing her to give you material. Also, you need to come from a fun, positive, emotional state, not a logical state. So put yourself into the proper state first before talking.

When you are in the right state, verbals become effortless and fun. When you are in the wrong state, your verbals are logical and awful.

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Leo Gura Aight I see what comes to mind. Last time I've said something about I'd love to see some naked boobs loud into the public then the barkeeper came with us into the club and said smth. silently with boobs and I ellbowed her boobs like 3 times with enough space. She just ran into me like on purpose with her boobs. 

This sh*t will definitely take some training. I'll see what improv interests come up as well as to speak with authority and clear intent. Aight aight I just see what I can come up with and what will happen in the moment. 

Thanks again for the exemplar. I'll see how far I'll get with all of this and focus on opening and being improvisational. Last time I triggered teacher when I improvised I laughed at her and myself and kept teasing her about, how can you teach elementary school children osmosis, I thought this is so funny. At one point she grabbed my hair angrily and shook me. In good jest. She had a boyfriend though. I'll see what will happen I think I am with the right people.

Edited March 5, 2022 by ValiantSalvatore

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

Last time I've said something about I'd love to see some naked boobs loud into the public

Avoid explicit sexual vulgarity.

Explicit sexual jokes turn off most women unless they are already very attracted to you.

[cle103]

@Leo Gura is there something you do to put yourself into an emotional, fun mood? Other than shit talking with wings and approaching (asking mainly for daygame). 

[Leo Gura]

32 minutes ago, cle103 said:

@Leo Gura is there something you do to put yourself into an emotional, fun mood? Other than shit talking with wings and approaching (asking mainly for daygame). 

1) Approaching and getting blown out

2) Shit talking with wings

3) Dancing & listening to good music

4) DMT

5) Going out consistently, building up momentum

6) Getting present and enjoying the environment, getting very calm in my body

7) Not thinking. Stop planning your approaches, stop thinking about "What am I going to say?"

8) Using funny, obnoxious, and absurd lines like: "Hi, I'm a douche bag. You should meet me." And in general just inventing new funny things to say to girls.

[PurpleTree]

13 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

1) Approaching and getting blown out

2) Shit talking with wings

3) Dancing & listening to good music

4) DMT

5) Going out consistently, building up momentum

6) Getting present and enjoying the environment, getting very calm in my body

7) Not thinking. Stop planning your approaches, stop thinking about "What am I going to say?"

8) Using funny, obnoxious, and absurd lines like: "Hi, I'm a douche bag. You should meet me." And in general just inventing new funny things to say to girls.

how do you deal with (chronic) fatigue when going out?

do you use modafinil or caffeine?